Chicago marathon

BUSTERHYMAN

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As I raced into the Chicago marathon, this dude next to me asked what I was running in aid of.
"Life," I said.
"What, like for starving children of the world or something?" He asked.
"No," I replied speeding up, "that angry bitch behind me is my wife who just found out I fucked her sister."
 

aninnymouse

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Run! Y'no she gah naif inner hans an a cupla moer inner purse! Run Fast! fore she catchup wit'cha. Y'll be ded furshur! Or, she cutcha so bat'chull wish y'was!