childhood sexual abuse survivors

Discussion in 'The Healthy Penis' started by rugbydude, Oct 17, 2006.

  1. rugbydude

    rugbydude New Member

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    hey chaps et al...was just curious how many here are, like me, survivors of childhood sexual abuse? and if so, what ongoing impacts this has had on your life esp in sexual matters..?! feel free to send a private message should you so desire. thanks people!
     
  2. danerain

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    I just have your basic touching issues... and paranoia....

    And you?
     
  3. rugbydude

    rugbydude New Member

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    well i also have severe touching and space issues. it's part of the post traumatic stress syndrome i struggle with. also took a VERY long time for me to trust women esp sexually as it was my mom who abused me, but healing is possible always with Love...wish u only good things and Peace dude. thank you for your bravery and honesty!
     
  4. danerain

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    Yeah, the touching issues are pretty "normal." I mainly got pinned to the floor by girls I really didn't like, and then they'd just hump me while I was screaming at them to get off me. When I was 12 I got molested by a doctor and just kinda decided that this is how women are going to treat me and that I'd just have to deal with it....

    Of course now I'm trying to get over this crap. Lucky for me I'm bi, and all the people who molested me were female. At least I don't have touching problems with guys.
     
  5. sykray

    sykray Active Member

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    I was inappropriately seduced by my grandmother, my father and two older male cousins. No one used force or threats. In fact, it was quite enjoyable but I was able to pick up on their guilt, anxiety etc.

    I have blurred boundaries (much less the case now) holding people at a distance and being withdrawn, shy and impersonal with them or being strongly identified with them as if we were merged into one person. The middle ground is too difficult for me to be comfortable with.

    When I was younger I was attracted mainly by guys who were between the ages of my cousins (late teens) and father - so I wanted partners who were older. Now I am still attracted to men in this age range (17 to 30) but few want a partner old enough to be a father or grandfather figure. Those that do can't cope with me not being an older figure from my perspective but seeing them as an extension of myself.

    I am a psychotherapist and sex therapist by training (surprise, surprise!) and I have had quite a lot of therapy on these and other issues. I can't have sex casually or anonymously. Potential partners must first be as close and as familiar as members of my family. When the sexual side of any relationship ends, I still want to retain that person as a part of my "family".
     
  6. rugbydude

    rugbydude New Member

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    what can i say? thank u to both of u for making me feel a bit more normal and less freaky. this subject of sexual abuse of men and boys by girls and women has been taboo for way too long. speaking for myself, it wasn't fun, it wasn't a secret initiation into the adult world of sex before my mates, and it certainly wasn't enjoyable. not to mention the healing i needed from God to undo it. again thanks to all!
     
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