Dolly Parton is just so amazing! What a wonderful voice and I can see how that song helped you through such a difficult time. You have my deepest empathy.
In four days, it will be my grandmother's 6th jahrzeit. She died 22 December 2005, and two days after that, her oldest son died. It wasn't a good Christmas for us. I remember sitting in the living room the next night, watching "A Christmas Story" over and over while downing a bottle of whiskey and not being able to stop crying. A friend said that it would be worse when lose my mother (this friend is not very tactful), but she watched me for the first few years of my life, thus imprinting me, so it was like losing one's parent.
Since then, the holidays just don't have the same meaning.
I think that we've have felt similar pain and loss, so I offer whatever consolation I can give and wish you much joy and peace this season and year 'round.
I'm going to go cry myself to sleep now.