Chronic Medical Condition And Dating

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2154371

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I was diagnosed with a chronic illness several years ago now and haven’t dated since. I have felt like I would be wasting her time, or am a bad investment given the uncertainty of my life expectancy, ability to have children, ability to take care of children, etc. Not to mention the daily inconvenience of a special diet, and lack of energy.

Hoping to get some honest opinions about how to broach this topic if/when I start dating again. Thanks in advance for you thoughts.
 
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693987

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I would say to not necessarily have it as a first date conversation, but maybe a second or third date conversation. Enough so the person has gotten to spend some time in your company/gotten to know you a bit better, but before there are likely to be any major expectations or hopes for things.

I have something I also disclosed to people after they got to know me a little, but early on in spending time in each other's company. Good luck!

P.S. Not all women want to raise a family, so some of the concerns you mention would be something that is sought after, not a drawback :)
 
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286798

Guest
For the right person, it won't be an issue.

If you're considering dating apps/websites, I probably wouldn't include anything about it, but I would disclose within the first few dates. If your special diet requires accommodation at a restaurant, that may be a natural way to bring it up.
 

LaFemme

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My dad had a significant health problem that limited his breathing and impacted his life span and energy. He lived to 75 when he was told he would only live to 30. After my mom passed away, he had a very robust dating life. He was not a healthy man at all, needed oxygen tanks. At his funeral there were at least 5 women who thought they were his girlfriend, although he really did have one serious woman. Stayed a player til til the end!

Btw, my mom was totally healthy and died suddenly at age 44. There’s no guarantee on life.

Life is completely what you make it. You only limit yourself. Don’t limit what someone else might feel for you.
 

AlteredEgo

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Yeah, my aunt died suddenly from an e. coli infection that she fought off for several months before her body suddenly gave out. I miss her every day. She was otherwise healthy; though morbidly obese, she had lost well over 100 pounds, and her blood chemistry was perfect. The coroner's report had mentioned enlarged heart, and I thought for a long time that was the COD, but no. It was an infection I had believed was cured. Nobody is promised anything. Much worse than dying is missing out on living from the crippling fear of death and its consequences.

One of my exes, one of my favorite people ever, died earlier thos year from complications of cirrhosis of the liver. I wouldn't take back a single second I gave him. I will always love him, and I'm utterly heartbroken by his passing, but I'm so thankful that he shared part of his life with me. I'm a better woman for having loved a good man like him.
 
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693987

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To add to what others have said about life being uncertain, my mother passed away at 55. She was a generally healthy person who seemingly spontaneously got cancer. She passed away less than 3 weeks after the diagnosis. You never know, really. Chronic medical condition certainly wouldn't be an issue with the right person who fit well with me.
 
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918177

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I have a chronic illness and I could date if I wanted to inspite of mobility issues and sometimes needing around the clock monitoring.
I still receive extravagant amounts of attention, I am self supporting and I run my own business and household.

Life is fucking short.

Grab life by the short hairs and LIVE.

You're a long time dead.
 

Scarletbegonia

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To add to what others have said about life being uncertain, my mother passed away at 55. She was a generally healthy person who seemingly spontaneously got cancer. She passed away less than 3 weeks after the diagnosis. You never know, really. Chronic medical condition certainly wouldn't be an issue with the right person who fit well with me.

The fast ones suck. My mom was diagnosed around valentines ‘18, and died April 30, 2018.

To the OP, I have a disorder that interferes with my diaphragm. Breathing isn’t something I take for granted. I was told, at age 17, that I could die in my sleep at any time. I’m 50, almost 51.
Aside from insomnia for a few years, the impact has been to tell partners if we get to the point of living together.