Hmmm...I never thought of that. That was very well said...However, for someone like me who sees it like smoking...which, once again, not against smokers just the act of smoking. In that context, can't you see that I might be a little scared that suddenly it will be wrong to tell people you shouldn't smoke...red ribbon week is prejudice, etc...I ask not out of hate...I really do want to hear feedback like jason's. I'm not narrow minded...:redface:
Thank you for that compliment.
By using that smoking analogy do you mean that you're not against homosexuality, just gay sex?
Are you saying that you're scared that people will say it's OK to be gay?
Let me diagram that sentence:
In that context, can't you see that I might be a little scared that suddenly it will be wrong to tell people you shouldn't have straight sex... straight ribbon week is prejudice, etc...I ask not out of hate...I really do want to hear feedback like jason's.
I really don't know any gay people who are against being straight. As gay people say, "If it weren't for straight people, I wouldn't be here!" I do know some gay people have suffered so much at the hands of some straight people that they are suspicious of many of them. They are, however, in the minority. I'm pretty masculine. Nobody ever takes me for a gay person, not even in gay venues. One Halloween party I went to had the host look at me and say, "What are you supposed to be? A straight guy?"
The deal is like with any other. Imagine you moved into a really gay town or neighborhood. You walk down the street holding hands with your wife, maybe kiss her in public, maybe want to chat with your guy friends about one particularly hot night you had, maybe she wants to chat-up her friends about some new thing you did that sent her to the moon. Maybe you left the shades up one day and the neighbors spy you giving her a very close and deep kiss. How comfortable would feel knowing all your gay neighbors might see those things? You could say, "I don't see any problem with it because that's normal behavior." But you might also say, "I would feel uncomfortable because of what my neighbors might think."
Gay people face this sort of thing frequently. They kiss each other or hold hands or are physically affectionate with each other and they're told, "they're flaunting their sexuality!"
Do you really care what other straight couples do in their own homes? Some straight couples fuck like bunnies, others don't have any sex at all, some are cheating on each other, some are miserable and on the verge of divorce. The fact is that the same things go on behind gay doors yet because of the sex involved, some straight people become uncomfortable because they then go on to imagine what's going on.
To look at gay sex for a moment, nothing goes on in gay bedrooms that doesn't go on in straight bedrooms. Men go down on women, women go down on men, and lots of men like being anally penetrated by their wives either with fingers or a dildo. The anus is an erogenous zone in all men and not a single religion believes that sexual relations of any sort between a married man and woman is immoral. You can be a good Catholic or Southern Baptist so long as it's your wife pegging you with a dildo.
But really, none of that matters. What adults do behind closed doors is really nobody else's business. Gays do not remotely care what straights do in the bedroom. Have you ever seen a gay march protesting straight sex? Have you ever seen gays claiming straight people should be denied marriage, adoption, a job, or being in the military because they're straight?
Did you ever see black people protesting to ban white people from those things? Now that blacks have full civil rights (though that may not be practiced in some places) and we've even elected a half-black president, do you see any instance where whites are barred from anything?
The key comes down to respect for individuality (a very American principle), privacy (another very American principle), and that in
public life, we are all, as American citizens, treated equally (an extremely American principle). Now if your church or private club wants to bar gays or if you don't want to invite them into your home, then that's your prerogative.
The marriage issue wouldn't be a big deal except that marriage confers legal rights and benefits to families allowing them to live as families in our society. Family members have rights to visit each other in hospital or prison, to decide our fate in terminally ill cases, rights of inheritance, to combine tax statuses, and most importantly, rights of parenthood.
Could you imagine your wife building a home for you, staying at home as a homemaker, raising your kids, managing your finances, standing by you through thick and thin, enriching your life in ever way and then, as soon as you die, your relatives coming in and taking it all away from her? The state claiming that all your property belongs to them? She ends up with nothing but the clothes on her back. That happens to gay couples.
Can you imagine your wife staying home and getting audited by the IRS every year, you limited to giving her only $10,000 a year and paying gift taxes on it, and then she gets dunned for inheritance taxes at your death? That happens to gay couples.
Imagine your wife is fighting in Iraq, serving her country in the most noble way possible only it's somehow discovered that she has a husband at home waiting for her. She's dishonorably discharged and sent home without benefit or pay. Imagine nobody discovers your wife is married to a man and your wife, God forbid, is killed in action and receives a military funeral. They don't hand the flag to you. They hand it to her parents. You don't receive any death benefits. That happens to gay couples.
Imagine your wife, again God forbid, is in a hospital near death and you can't visit her because you're not legally her family. Imagine she slips into a vegetative state and you have no say in whether life support is continued or terminated. Both of these things happen to gay couples.
Imagine your wife needs a transfusion and the only person who can donate that blood is a gay person. Your wife won't get that blood because gays cannot donate blood.
And the greatest horror:
Could you imagine your wife dying and then find social services on your doorstep to take away your kids because you're not their legal parent? Your kids are taken away, put into foster homes, and you have to hope that not only can you afford a lawyer, but that the lawyer wins. If you don't win or can't afford defending yourself and your family, then your kids could go into foster care or be handed over to her relatives until they're 18. That happens to gay families.
