Closing Out an Old Chapter

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Pecker Check, Jul 21, 2009.

  1. Pecker Check

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    I tend to relive old experiences and remember people from the past. Maybe I do this too much. Anyhow, when I was 10 or 11 I used to play around sexually with a guy who was a couple of years older. At some point, after we hadn’t done anything for several months, we got by ourselves I was amazed (and delighted!) by the changes in him. We only had a few such experiences after his genitals had grown, but I thought they were wonderfully huge! Nor did we exactly know what to do with his new stuff and abilities. We tried a few naïve things but didn’t really make the best of the opportunities.

    A lot of years have gone by, and I’ve often wondered what became of this guy. My family moved away from our home town for a couple of years, and by the time we came back he had moved out of the area. All I know is where he went to high school after that, and I wrote a very vanilla letter to the school. Of course, they could/would tell me nothing.

    Has anybody had any experience with trying to track down figures from the past and how did it work out? How did you end up finding the person, and was it worth the search? I only want to get back in touch, share my lingering thoughts, and maybe exchange pictures and emails. If it were to come to anything more than that, OK, but I doubt that it would. By now, I’m completely out and in a good relationship. This is not about getting “back together.” For all I know, our experimentation is something he no longer thinks about or wants to think about. I’d just like to close out a chapter of an old book. Has anyone else in here ever thought about doing (or actually done) something like this?
     
  2. chiasmj

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    Luckily I'm young enough that anyone whose name I still remember has most likely found their way onto Facebook, or can at least be tracked down with a basic Google search.

    I did have one experience tracking down a straight friend of mine who I lost touch with after I transferred schools in 9th grade. We were mostly inseparable for a time, and even had a sleepover. We actually slept together in the same bed, fully clothed, because the guest bed was in another room, wasn't made up for me and we were too beat to set it up. I remember that experience being very exciting and confusing, but I was too scared and inexperienced to suggest that we fool around at all.

    So I tracked him down about a year or two ago on Facebook and we had a long catching up conversation (where are you now, oh you're married) and eventually ended up coming out to him and asking specific questions about the time we spent together, how he interpreted all that, and what happened to him and our group of friends after I transferred to the new school.

    I've tracked down a few other friends from that period (one of whom is gay now) and all I found out was that the boys who were straight would have responded negatively to any sexual advances, but despite that there were some fun times that I missed out on because I appeared so stuck up and closed minded (mostly it was the boys showing off to each other--I seriously missed out on all male bonding as a kid).

    But that's my story, and I almost forgot about all that digging I did a few years ago until you mentioned it. So in the end, here's what I have to say: If this is bugging you, if you think this is truly a missing piece, go forward with no expectations and track him down. You'll get some piece that will fit in your puzzle, but it never is the piece you're expecting. And then you'll forget about it and go about your life.

    j
     
    #2 chiasmj, Jul 23, 2009
    Last edited: Jul 23, 2009
  3. Countryguy63

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    Afraid I'm no help as I'm in the same situation, only I can't recall how to spell his last name so it's even harder. I can say it, but it was a very long Italian name with some extra letters thrown in, lol.

    Good Luck
     
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