cock sex at the urinals

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carolinacurious:
I have never, NEVER, put my hands on any part of a person that could even slightly be construed as sexual without clear consent, I don't see why I shouldn't expect the same from others. Why we are even having this conversation baffles me, but it does make clear why some people act abhorrently.

I think you should be able to expect the same from others.

I'm not really sure we are having this conversation. (If you can get my meaning from my previous posts)

I don't see anyone advocating abhorrent behavior, certainly not me.

The main point of contention is how to react when someone else crosses the line and even that point is somewhat vague, to me anyway.

Now whether he was talking about giving or receiving I couldn't say, but I see what you're saying now, Carolinacurious. To me, it doesn't matter, because we were talkings about RIGHTS. If he wants to be forgiving, that's his right, certainly! But it certainly can't be expected that other do accordingly.

It is very clear to me that he was talking about being on the receiving side of things, at least from what was written, to me there is no ambiguity on that point.

It's not clear to me that Indianaman was talking about RIGHTS, I know I have been. I have asked Indianaman a specific question that would clear this up, at least for me. But it's too vague for me at this point.

I've said before and in case there is any confusion: I know you were within your rights.

I feel rather strongly: If someone forces ME into an exceptional circumstance, I really don't want to hear about how I handled wrongly later (at least from a legal standpoint anyway). Break into my house and you get what you get, "I violated your rights?", too fucking bad, I didn't put your ass there, nor did I ask to be woken up in the middle of the night to make an immediate life or death decision.
 

MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK

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Right off the bat, may I point out that for all of you who find my reaction to a complete stranger attempting touch me without my permission a bit overboard,

TOUGH SHIT!! :grr: If I wish to refuse any physical action by somebody I know nothing about, then you'd better goddamn well believe I'm going to react, even if it means I have to defend myself physically.

Let's also face something here; you can't just expect me to let a grope go by without making my point. So my breaking a hand is reciprocative to a grope.

And I refuse to subscribe to the notion that anyone has the right to be physically curious about another and not be held accountable if harm befalls the toucher.
 

B_DoubleMeatWhopper

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Originally posted by MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK@Mar 23 2005, 02:17 AM
Right off the bat, may I point out that for all of you who find my reaction to a complete stranger attempting touch me without my permission a bit overboard,

Chuck, I think most of us here agree with you, and would act similarly. A bit overboard? As if grabbing your 'massive package' without your permission isn't a bit overboard on the part of Mr. Groper. We got your back, dude, as long as you take care of your front! ;)
 

B_hungrick

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Originally posted by geewise@Mar 22 2005, 06:36 AM
just interested to know if anyone has had any good experiences when going to the urinals in public that you've been able to attract a complete stranger, by looking at each others big dicks and perhaps sucking or playing while you were there?
[post=292928]Quoted post[/post]​


To get back to the original post. I'm like many of the people here in that I don't know why a public restroom would be a good place to have sex, whatever kind it is. Maybe someone could explain this to me. Public restrooms are not exactly comfortable places to be intimate. Or is this just me?
 

MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK

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The comment is appreciated, especially when it comes from a logical individual like you, there, DMW.

Now, if everybody here wouldn't mind, let's all just grab a decaf somewhere on me, and let our blood pressure drop a thousand points. And let's all try and behave and not get belligerent and totally boneheaded again, hmmm??
 

madame_zora

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Originally posted by MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK@Mar 23 2005, 02:17 AM
Right off the bat, may I point out that for all of you who find my reaction to a complete stranger attempting touch me without my permission a bit overboard,

TOUGH SHIT!! :grr: If I wish to refuse any physical action by somebody I know nothing about, then you'd better goddamn well believe I'm going to react, even if it means I have to defend myself physically.

Let's also face something here; you can't just expect me to let a grope go by without making my point. So my breaking a hand is reciprocative to a grope.

And I refuse to subscribe to the notion that anyone has the right to be physically curious about another and not be held accountable if harm befalls the toucher.
[post=293187]Quoted post[/post]​


Hola! We have a winner! I've got plenty of midwestern farm girl in me to take care of myself too, I see no reason on earth for a lecher to be indulged. Now, if someone wants to handle it differently, that's their biz, but the point is, groper beware!

I see it like this, if it's just a look, I'll either let it slide, or try to catch their eye if I want it to stop. If that doesn't work, I'll say, "Can I help you?", that almost always works. If some creep is following me around in a public place and finding repetitive reasons to "brush up" against me, I'll scowl at him the first time, and loudly humiliate him the second time with a "Get the fuck away from me, asshole!". BUT on the few occasions that someone has helped themselves to putting their hands on my boobs, butt or crotch uninvited or unexpected, they're gonna get hit with everything I've got. Don't give a fuck how anyone feels. My body, my rights being violated. I guarantee the few times this has happened, the groper though a little more about it next time he got the urge, and I see that as my social responsibility. Those who are stronger should protect those who are not.

Carolinacurious, your example of someone breaking into your house is a good one. If they don't want to get beat/shot/maced/whatever, they don't need to be breaking into your private property. I see this in the same light.
 
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carolinacurious: deleted in the interest of...in the interest of....I never had any real interest in this thread anyway....
 
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carolinacurious: This will probably arrive too late, like usual, but I thought I would point out Chuck:

If I were on a Jury and you were on trial for breaking someone's hand because they grabbed your penis at a urinal, with no invitation from you, then I would vote for aquittal and I would be willing to hang the jury for months if I had to.

[deleted]


Please get back to your regularly scheduled discussion about cruising tearooms. sorry for the interruption. pardon.
 

madame_zora

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*Locks arms with Chuck*

I hate decaf, how about you? :p


I don't want to escalate this any further, I think it's played out. We have differing opinions, at least in terms of degrees. I would never advocate violence offensively, but defensively- absolutly. On a case-by-case basis, no one really knows what they'll do until they're there. I've been there, and maybe that's the only difference between us.
 

uylenborch

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Yawn.........

Have had the occasional grope. It's not all that difficult to figure out who is receptive, who is oblivious, and who is flaunting themselves for entrapment purposes, whether official or vigilante.
 

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Originally posted by BuffMusicIdol@Mar 22 2005, 05:55 PM
Whao.
I didn't follow the thread to the end.

Indiana:
I don't ever allow name calling in my house, regardless of the reasonm, age, or status in society.

Go to your room until you grow up and leave us the hell alone. Don't come out until you can be civil and respectful. You are obviously acting as a child, and so expect to be treated as one by all of us here. And if you don't want to be treated as a child, then STOP ACTING LIKE ONE!!!

Sheesh. I have enough kid problems without coming here and putting up with this.
[post=293116]Quoted post[/post]​

Are you saying that I am acting like a child? I don't remember resorting to name-calling, please point out where I did and if I did, my apologies. Believe me or not, that was not my intent. Not just in this situation but in EVERY situation, you should look at both sides. That was ALL I ever intended to do. This clearly got way out of hand. Perhaps I instigated and again, my apologies. I was only trying to get folks to discuss and look at both sides of the situation. Regardless of the situation and me personally, I don't advocate violence with violence, that was my whole point about this. Some of you feel differently and that is okay. I happen to feel that it is a terrible way to deal with things.

Have I been groped in restrooms, bars, etc....? Yes and I have handled it non-violently each time. I would NEVER grope or brush up against someone without their permission and on purpose. My understanding from trying to get caught up on all the conversation is that folks feel that I have or would. Have I thought about it? Yes, I have. Would I ever carry it through, absolutely not. My side of the argument had more to do with the reaction NOT with whether it was wrong or not. Anyway, I will happily read your responses. I feel I have said probably more than enough for some of you to hear. I won't apologize however. I feel it is my social responsibility to discuss both sides of an issue, not just a knee-jerk reaction. Clearly this is a controversial thread with passionate feelings. Thank you all for sharing them. I'm done.
 

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I'll keep this short and sweet (for once). Clearly we are approaching this from different angles, but I think I misunderstood you post in one way- I thought you were defending your right to grope, but now I see you were only defending your right to react in the manner you deem appropriate, so I apologise for jumping your shit. Yes, you did call me a bitch (not unwarranted), but I did call you stupid first. If you had in fact been saying it was alright to grope someone unwanted and expect to be treated non-violently, THAT would have been stupid, but I think you were only saying YOU would not hit someone for doing that to you, which is your choice.
 

MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK

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Indianaman, I'm reasonably sure you don't appreciate an individual's right not to be touched without permission. True, what I did was assault when this happened, but if you think(Something I'm sure the better % of this lot who don't take this seriously don't do!), the guy who did this actually also assaulted me as well.

Now I myself don't find the act of maiming anyone pleasurable at all. Truth be told, I would've rather he only looked and not acted on his curiosity.But he didn't, and things happened. My fault? I didn't take undeserved physical liberties upon a total stranger, and I have to say I probably never will.
 

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Originally posted by indianaman_04@Mar 23 2005, 03:17 PM
I don't remember resorting to name-calling, please point out where I did and if I did, my apologies.

Post #25 of this thread:

No, you are stupid to think that way you stupid bitch!!

Yes, referring to Jana as a 'stupid bitch' is name-calling. She's not stupid.
 

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Just behave yourselves. I come here because I like the people and generally the conversations. I've had enough arguing in my life.

No name calling, please. It's not necessary.

I've had enough of this thread. I'll find something else to make smart alec remarks on.
 

Freddie53

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A major point has been left out of this conversation about groping, sexual activity in public restrooms and all. The police regularly cruise restrooms undercover and arrest people regularly for being propositioned too. So in public restrooms consider the fact that sexual activity in illegal there. Find some other place to do it. Period. Unless, of course, you really enjoy the beds down at the local jail.

I don't know exactly what undercover cops do encoruage would be sexual predators in public restrooms to do their thing. And I would rather not know.

But anytime a person makes unwanted without permission advances toward another person, that person is a predator and in most instances it is illegal.

I liked the way a first grade teacher explained it to an elementary boy when he grabbed the ass of an elementary girl. She chewed him out royally and I remember her words because they were so simple and true.

She said, "You can't put your hands on her butt, it isn't yours. It doesn't belong to you." How simple to understand. Of course in elemenary school she didn't add unless you have permission.


I am glsd that the discussion is coming to a better understanding then what was there earlier. Of course, each person, if a sexaul predator physically advances him or her, has to make his or her own decision what to do about it. It is the personal property of that person. Of course that person being attacked can allow it to continue, politely say no, or kick them in the ass or some other physicaL act.

And yes, we all have to face whatever consequences come from our actions. Personally, I would probably chew the predator out verbally and scream bloody murder. But then that would be my first reaction. But you can bet I would resort to physical action if verbal action didn't succeed.

The only thing I can see here worth discussing is how to respond to a sexaul predator in any situation in a way that stops the behavior and prevents any physcial danger to the the person being assaulted.

Jana, in your case, I support what you would do. Why, because you know how to do it effectively. I have to doubt you know how to put a man on the floor. So your reaction is a valid one. But a feeble or weak person might out of necessity react differently. In a public place, I suggest shouting bloody murder. In a loud voice loud enough for everyone to hear, yell exactly what the predator has done.

If a victim is not willing to do that, then tell the management what has happened. And if for some reason the victim is not willing to even tell the management, then the victim needs a way to exit the scene completely.

The tragic part is when the pradator is physically stronger than the victim and there are no people around, the victim is in a damned if they do and damned if they don't. There have been children and perhaps some adults who have wet their pants because of a bad previous scene in a public restroom. They, the victims of previous assault, were that scared of going into a public restroom and wet their pants rather then go in the public restroom because they couldn't find someone to go in with them in time. How tragic. No, I don't know of this happening to adults. But yes, sadly in public school restrooms and schools. it has happened. And as a teacher I am embarassed to admit that the teachers and principals knew about the assaults in the restrooms and did absolutely nothing about it.

That is why all sexual activity and any acts of assault period in public restrooms must be aggresively be monitored by police, teachers, bosses etc.and aggressors dealt with severely.

Invite - if both are past 18 years of age yes. But never in a public restroom. Find some other place to extend the invitations.
Assault - No. Not No, but No,No. No. Regardless if age or gender.
Why should we even be discussing if it is alright to be a sexaul predator or not?
We must call a spade a spade in this situation and not sugar coat it. There is not enough sugar in the world to sweeten a case where one person is a sexual predator of another person. Period.

Bottom line: All public restrooms should be a safe place for everyone regardless of gender, age, or physical strength. A five year old should feel safe in a public restroom. So should a 90 year old person.

Of course, potential victims need to use common sense. If the "potential victim" knows the reputation of a certain bar and knows that the restroom there is a pickup place for gay people, that "potential victim" needs to take that into account when planning when and where restroom visits will take place.