Confused Straight Hot Head

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Smaccoms, Oct 4, 2008.

  1. Smaccoms

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    So, my friend "X", he's rediculously hot, awesome guy (in general, really), and straight...or so he claims. All his friends (and ex girlfriend too) say he's practically bisexual, whether he admits it or not, and me and him get along really well (we get in deep conversations sometimes). It's true he likes to make out with me and all (only when drunk or high obviously). It seems as well, sometimes when he's coming back to sober, but I'm there suggesting something, he might take another shot to prolong his drunkeness (for me?). He's told me he just like flirting (and goin to bed in rare cases) with other guys when he's bored, and wants some entertainment, but I have my doubts. I've known him for three years and we still make out. His room mate told he talks about me ALL the time, more than his girlfriend even. Apparently, he really likes me, when I just figured I was a play toy or something, but his room mate claims otherwise. Not that the friendship i in peril or anything, I just wanted to get peoples' perspective on the situation, it always really has intrigued me, and iI don't know what to make of it (I mean we're still friends as far as I know so). So, your thoughts (if you please?)
     
  2. nashboy

    nashboy Active Member

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    sounds like a good situation to me...just milk it and have fun...dont read too much into it...you could freak him out. just go with the flow...if hes comfortable, you'll know.
     
  3. ledroit

    ledroit New Member

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    What has kept you back? Sounds like he's trying to tell you he's not as straight as he thought he was, and he likes you. So....?
     
  4. B_Think_Kink

    B_Think_Kink New Member

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    Tell him to set up a threesome with you and a girl, he might be able to go for it more easily and that way you can get your fill of girl as well.
     
  5. BigDallasDick8x6

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    I would love to help you out with some good advice, however I will need to see several naked pics of this ridiculously hot guy in order to better formulate my answer. :biggrin1:

    Seriously, good luck.

    The thing that concerns me is the "hot head" in the title you chose for this thread. You didn't that explain that in your post and no one else conmmented on it either. Are you saying he has a bad temper? If so, you need to elaborate on that.

    Or does that mean he's hot and you want to give, or have given, him head??

    What exactly do you mean by "make out"? It's been my experience that kissing is the last thing a straight guy will do with another guy. They'll have sex but won't kiss. Or won't kiss until you've given them a lot of blowjobs. So if he's at the kissing stage, he's willing to have sex with you (if he's the typical straight guy).

    Even if you're just groping each other like drunk college guys do, if he's groping you back he'll let you suck him, especially when he can claim afterwards that he was drunk.
     
  6. Corius

    Corius New Member

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    When he's sober tell him how much you have enjoyed the intimacies you shared while he was fortified by the alcohol. Tell him it's alright for men to get to know each other "really well"--that what two men do together is their business and that you would like to feel unihibited even when both of you are sober. Lay it on a bit thick so that he understands that you dig him as a person. He has to know that it's o. k. with you and you want it to be o. k. with him as well. It is your goal to get him to soberly express to you what he tells others you mean to him. Right?
     
  7. B_Nick4444

    B_Nick4444 New Member

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    yes, please! :biggrin1:
     
  8. Smaccoms

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    haha thats a good idea, I'd feel weird asking him for sex though, I mean he usually likes to stay in control, like just earlier this week, we were playin Beirut, just having fun, and hi roomate (a gay girl) kept saying how I'm so hot and she'd love to see us make out (apparently I'm really hot, even "X" has always thought (and said that night) that I'm really cute, although he always ends that with I could get some hot girls) after some long convincing from her, he finnaly subsided. He pulled me toward him and frenched me the entire time, grabbing my ass (I grabbed his in response), rubbing up all against me. Obviously, he doesn't sound straight at this point right? OKay next he shoves me on the bed, gets on top of me and whispers in my year for a rating and I'm just like, I dunno. SO, he spends like the next 20 minutes at least sitting with his crotch over mine right on top of me as I'm laying on the bed.
    I didn't really mean anything by hot head (only that he's hot) You do have a point ith the making out thing though, didn't think about that. He has told me that he didn't want to lead me on (I told him he wasn't) So that obviously means he doesn't want to go there with me. He has a lot of regrets in his life (having with too many people I guess or something like that), so while he does like frenching me and stuff, I guess he's afraid he may regret going any deeper. It's weird, he still remains to identify as straight. Also, while I've known him 3 years, I've only seen him 3 or 4 times a year (that was a little misleading) We've only made out twice as well, so I guess it's still new to him (with me anyway, maybe he just hasn't felt anything for aother guy before, and I"m the first? I wasn't expecting him to feel anything, I guess he's just tryin to figure things out) LAWL, it's so weird I don't know what to do, guess just bide my time and get to know him better. I mean, we do share some intimate thughts, like the other night we were talking about what feeligns scared us most in the world quite seriously, and he was straight with me (of course it was 4 in the morning after getting high and getting drunk and we were alone in the dark, so)
     
  9. BigDallasDick8x6

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    >>OKay next he shoves me on the bed, gets on top of me and whispers in my year for a rating and I'm just like, I dunno.<<

    Dude, that was an easy one -- You should have said "You're absolutely the hottest guy I know."
     
  10. Smaccoms

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    hahawoulda been fun, but somehow, some voice in my head was telling me I didn't want to sound like a slut. I feel like he'd enjoy himself more and keep pushing himself if I make him feel like he hasn't totally seduced me yet, yea know? IT's true, I wasn't totally hard, just aroused. Obviously I want him, but I feel like I'll get him in the sack more likely if I play it like a game, have a litle fun with it. Funny putting it that way when it sounds like he's seducing me hehe, does any of this make sense (I mean, I heard him telling my sister once he was tired of being treated like a cock instead of a person, and I like him as a person :))
     
  11. Corius

    Corius New Member

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    If this "hot" fellow is the type you would value as a friend, by all means concentrate on the friendshp---and, yes, don't treat him as just a cock! I'd say that you would be better off avoiding the complications of alcohol. Let him know that his "moves" do arouse the animal urges in you; assure him that he is safe with you in exploring just where it is at for him as far as his sexuality is concerned. Ideally, two persons are so bonded in friendship/love that when sex seems like the next appropriate stage they literally fall into each others arms and the sex seems natural and right. And when it has happened do take the time to tell each other what it has meant to you.The fellow is obvously confused and is looking for something he hasn't yet given himself the permission to pursue. Are you ready to declare your feelings for him? Or, shall we just assume that both of you just want to have a bit of fun? It makes a world of difference. No one likes to be used.
     
  12. blooeyz

    blooeyz New Member

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    maybe he is afraid of losing you if the sex doesn't work out?
     
  13. B_Think_Kink

    B_Think_Kink New Member

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    I would get really drunk and really stoned with him and tell him that you want to do a girl, but you're scared to do it alone.. he may chime in and tell you he will help you out.. then you'll have a bonding experience and you may be able to go from there with him.
     
  14. Smaccoms

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    yea, I've at least decided to tell him how glad I am that we're good friends. He has made mistakes, but he's one of those people that just tries and tries to be a good person, but he still can't believe that he is (even though he really is). I think I want to let him know he can trust me--I trust him (something you don't run into everyday, is it hehe), I think you might be right about the sex thing though. Very good thought also that he thinks he might loose me if the sex doesn't work out, that makes a lot of sense (for him). I mean he recently broke it off with a girl he had real feelings for, and I think what broke it off is that he cheated on her (and it depresses him cause he still has feelings for her). He even told me he's been having a lot of regrets lately about some stuff that he's done. I think thoughts of what he done t people he cares about it holding him back cause he's terrified he's going to do it again. He's seems really depressed about this stuff still. I want to make him feel better hehe, thanks for all the insight everbody, it's really helping me. :smile:
     
  15. CUBE

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    If you want a relationship with a person...any focus on him past entertainment purposes is a waste...he doen't know what the fuck he wants.
     
  16. nudeyorker

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    Is having a straight forward honest (sober) conversation with your friend out of the question?
     
  17. Smaccoms

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    Your both right, aren't you. haha He does need to figure what he wants doesn't he? Well maybe not even that, more being okay with what he wants, and confident he won't make the same mistake again? Next time I se him I see how things go
     
  18. Corius

    Corius New Member

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    But he might find out if he were to concentrate on one relationship at a time. One really doesn't know what a relationship with a man or with a woman would be like until one gives himself to such a relationship with a depth of devotion and concentration (it helps to be uninhibited)which comes close to being love.
     
  19. jason_els

    jason_els <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    I don't think letting him seduce you is necessarily a good thing. If, as you say, he's worried about hurting people he loves, he may feel very guilty for attempting to seduce you and then being unsure of how you felt about it. Yes, your tactic does make sense. There's a saying, "A boy chases a girl until she catches him." I just don't think this is the right tactic here and now. What this guy needs is sincerity and security. Go out, have a great time together, but definitely have that talk with him about where you stand regarding him. He needs to know he's safe with you.

    You'll know when the right time is, but I suggest the next time you feel the time is right to do something, you make a move. This will reassure him that he's not the only pursuer in this relationship. I say give this all a try because there's definitely romantic potential going on here.
     
  20. Smaccoms

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    Yea know, I think you're right, that feels like the most reasonable thing to do, I'll go ahead with that then hehe. Although we haven't talked since that night, I guess he's just doin life stuff lol
     
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