da_blissmachine: I consider myself strait. I have had many erotic dreams in the past about females and am comfortable with them. But last night for the first time in my life i had one about a male friend. What dould this meen?
Not a damn thing. Or everything, it could be.
Seriously, I keep hearing comfortable statistics on the frequency of same-sex erotic dreams -- that, essentially, it's much more common than you think, plus it has no conclusive bearing on eventual sexuality. Look at it this way. Plenty of your peers may have already had some sort of same-sex experience, whether it be simple playing around or mutual masturbation or more sexual-laden behaviors like oral sex or penetrative sex. Because of this single act, do they become gay? The answer: not at all.
Don't be alarmed by the dream, man. Though you may find it strange that a friend appeared in one of your erotic fantasies, it doesn't necessarily infer your attractions or longing for the guy. Simply asked, do you find him attractive? Do you want to act out on your fantasies? Or, are they merely that -- thoughts?
Until your feelings begin to change for your friend (and you'll know it), you're still straight.
Seriously, I keep hearing comfortable statistics on the frequency of same-sex erotic dreams -- that, essentially, it's much more common than you think, plus it has no conclusive bearing on eventual sexuality. Look at it this way. Plenty of your peers may have already had some sort of same-sex experience, whether it be simple playing around or mutual masturbation or more sexual-laden behaviors like oral sex or penetrative sex. Because of this single act, do they become gay? The answer: not at all.
Don't be alarmed by the dream, man. Though you may find it strange that a friend appeared in one of your erotic fantasies, it doesn't necessarily infer your attractions or longing for the guy. Simply asked, do you find him attractive? Do you want to act out on your fantasies? Or, are they merely that -- thoughts?
Until your feelings begin to change for your friend (and you'll know it), you're still straight.
Don't sweat it, dude; it's just a dream. Everyone at sometime or other realises the possibility of doing the deed with someone of the sex opposite of what his orientation dictates. Most people just never follow through with it. And even if you did try it out once just to satisfy any curiosity you might have, it doesn't automatically make you an ass pirate. There's a saying: Once a philosopher; twice a sodomite! But I don't think your dream is trying to tell you anything ... I've eaten pussy in a dream before, and trust me - it's not going to happen! 
da_blissmachine: could it be a desire for closeness and "brotherhood" between males?
there was no anal or oral sex:
we were sleeping over at my basement (in the dream) and goofing off with my camera and funny clothes making silly "model" looks and stuff. then it went on to sexier more suggestive looks. then we stripped and felt eachtoher's biceps and shoulders and noses (weird no?), then we started to jack off and touched eachtohers penises a bit.
there was no anal or oral sex:
we were sleeping over at my basement (in the dream) and goofing off with my camera and funny clothes making silly "model" looks and stuff. then it went on to sexier more suggestive looks. then we stripped and felt eachtoher's biceps and shoulders and noses (weird no?), then we started to jack off and touched eachtohers penises a bit.
jackinman: Don't worry about it buddy. It was just a dream. It doesn't mean anything. Like others have mentioned here, as long as you don't plan on acting out on any of the fantasizes you are still st8.
[quote author=da_blissmachine link=board=meetgreet;num=1045017137;start=0#3 date=02/11/03 at 19:47:48]
"...could it be a desire for closeness and "brotherhood" between males?..."
[/quote]
da_blissmachine,
I think you can stop worrying, too.
And, yes...it could be a deep-seated psychological desire (NEED, really) for not only closeness but more like bonding with other males... in a strictly positive way.
I have done in-depth reading to help me understand my very troubled past. I was extremely introverted during my first twenty years. Didn't go out for sports; couldn't relate to my dad (in fact, in retrospect, he outright rejected me; I just didn't realize it then nor the consequences that meant to me emotionally) I withdrew from being around other males during a crucial time of my life (when ultimately my emotional journey from boyhood to manhood could have been MUCH easier had I had postive role models via my father and being around other guys and getting involved with "guy things" such a sports, cars, dating girls in H.S. etc.) Instead, I remained somewhat of a recluse; down on myself, with very little self esteem and motivation to even try. This "trend" was so very subtle year to year for me; I just didn't see it nor did I realize the paralyzing effect not having other guys in my life was having upon me. It took the death of my father (just two years ago) and not being able to grieve for him that led me into the journey of "untangling" my past. It all makes perfect sense now. Guys need to have other guys in their lives....but not necessarily in a sexual kind of way.
Guys need to feel accepted and a part of the "brotherhood" of their gender. Your dream I strongly suspect has to do more with your desire to be one of the guys. I don't read anything at all in your dream about the issue of sexual orientation here necessarily. And I wouldn't fret over it just now. It's NOT the real issue here at all and I am willing to bet on it!
And, who's to say hormonal "adjustments" are contributing to your dreams at this stage of your early life? Testosterone is a powerful force to reckon with.
The other posters have shared some good insights, too.
So, relax.
And, btw....I sure wish I could remember the details of my dreams like you did! -- Shoot, I can't even remember the next morning if I even HAD a dream! ;D
"...could it be a desire for closeness and "brotherhood" between males?..."
[/quote]
da_blissmachine,
I think you can stop worrying, too.
And, yes...it could be a deep-seated psychological desire (NEED, really) for not only closeness but more like bonding with other males... in a strictly positive way.
I have done in-depth reading to help me understand my very troubled past. I was extremely introverted during my first twenty years. Didn't go out for sports; couldn't relate to my dad (in fact, in retrospect, he outright rejected me; I just didn't realize it then nor the consequences that meant to me emotionally) I withdrew from being around other males during a crucial time of my life (when ultimately my emotional journey from boyhood to manhood could have been MUCH easier had I had postive role models via my father and being around other guys and getting involved with "guy things" such a sports, cars, dating girls in H.S. etc.) Instead, I remained somewhat of a recluse; down on myself, with very little self esteem and motivation to even try. This "trend" was so very subtle year to year for me; I just didn't see it nor did I realize the paralyzing effect not having other guys in my life was having upon me. It took the death of my father (just two years ago) and not being able to grieve for him that led me into the journey of "untangling" my past. It all makes perfect sense now. Guys need to have other guys in their lives....but not necessarily in a sexual kind of way.
Guys need to feel accepted and a part of the "brotherhood" of their gender. Your dream I strongly suspect has to do more with your desire to be one of the guys. I don't read anything at all in your dream about the issue of sexual orientation here necessarily. And I wouldn't fret over it just now. It's NOT the real issue here at all and I am willing to bet on it!
And, who's to say hormonal "adjustments" are contributing to your dreams at this stage of your early life? Testosterone is a powerful force to reckon with.
The other posters have shared some good insights, too.
So, relax.
And, btw....I sure wish I could remember the details of my dreams like you did! -- Shoot, I can't even remember the next morning if I even HAD a dream! ;D
BIGBOYDAVE: From looking at other posting you have made I got a feeling your curious about exploring other sides of your sexuality hence the dream .
Go ahead explore your young if u feel uncomfortable doing some things then don't do them.
if there are things you are comfortable exploring then enjoy.
Go ahead explore your young if u feel uncomfortable doing some things then don't do them.
if there are things you are comfortable exploring then enjoy.
sammygirly: I wouldn't worry about it either way. If you want to explore, do so. If you don't, don't. Dreams don't define who you are or I'd be a large-ish pickle living in a trailer with Bob Barker and Christina Aguilera.... ;D
Honestly, it's my opinion that we are all bisexual at birth, and develop tastes depending on outside factors as we age. I see nothing wrong with it at all...sexuality of all kinds is human nature.
Honestly, it's my opinion that we are all bisexual at birth, and develop tastes depending on outside factors as we age. I see nothing wrong with it at all...sexuality of all kinds is human nature.
