Contrary Couples

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by ClaireTalon, Jan 24, 2006.

  1. ClaireTalon

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    Something that I have no experience with, but find it extremely interesting. Do you believe in something like contrary couples, ie, couples that personify great differences in interests, or physically? Or even better, do you have first-hand experience?

    From my purely theoretical point of view, I can't imagine those couples to be very long-lasting. Maybe for the moment, but nothing for the long run.
     
  2. RideRocket

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    As far as high profile couples, you have James Carville and Mary Matalin - both definitely on extremes.

    As long as you maintain an open line of communication with your significant other, things should be ok.
     
  3. Shelby

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    also Schwarzenegger/Kennedy
     
  4. Matthew

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    Physical differences in couples don't surprise me. The differences in interests (i.e. big political divides as mentioned above) do. Don't understand how those can work. Hot sex is one thing -- building a life together is totally different.
     
  5. Pene_Negro_Grande

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    Most of my friends are like that....Really multicultural and religion....
     
  6. Webster

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    My best friend and his partner (also a close friend) are celebrating 30 years together as of next month. On the surface, they seem like a very incompatable couple. Through the years they have each changed many aspects of their lives. But they are a testament that true love survives through all the changes, troubles and challenges that 30 years can bring to a relationship.
     
  7. Webster

    Webster New Member

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    Contrary couples?
    My parents never got along.
    Same with both sets of grandparents...................
     
  8. Irish

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    Physically different...

    My girlfriend is very petite (4'11" ~90 lbs.) and, while skinny as a rail, I'm not at all small at 6'3". I suppose we have quite a few similar interests and thoughts on some subjects, but there are also a lot of things that we feel very differently about. I don't really see it as making a difference much one way or the other unless it's incredibly extreme.
    If you and your partner are too much alike, where's the fun in that? No unpredictability, no surprises, it's like dating yourself. On the other hand, if you can't agree on anything it's very hard to be happy about much of anything with that person and the chances that you'll even get along are slim to none.

    Every girl I've dated has been (very) short and had fairly different philosophical views from myself. I find that I really like having someone I can argue (not fight) with and someone who can make me see things a little differently. Contrary couples can also be complimentary couples, if you're looking for someone who "completes you" then the best thing to do is find someone you can get along with but isn't really like you. Otherwise you're just intensifying your own missing parts.
     
  9. DC_DEEP

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    Kisses to you, Claire! I think a great deal depends upon where the couples have similarities, and where they have differences. My partner and I agree on a lot of things, and disagree on many others. We do spend a lot of time talking about lots of things, though. Even with a narrow subject like politics, we have agreements and disagreements. The important thing is that we view our discussions as just that, rather than personal attacks. And we try to discuss logically, give reasons for a stated view, listen to the other side, discuss some more.

    He is shorter than I, 5 years older, slightly larger around the waist, and exceptionally "type-A". I'm much more laid-back. He's a music lover, but has no musical ability or training; I'm an extensively trained musician. We both have lots of experience in science, especially Chemistry. It seems that our similarities and differences mesh perfectly, and it turns out that my weaknesses are his strengths, and my strengths are his weaknesses. We balance very well, and people comment to me all the time about our synergistic presence and energy as a couple.
     
  10. BBB2.5

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    Excellent question.
    I have been in a long term committed relationship. 8 years this February. We share many of the same likes. Get along great. No arguments..."ever".
    However, we are as different as night and day. I am very out going. Tall with a swimmers build. High school graduate. Most of all extremely sexual.
    While he is shorter and stocky. Laid back and easy going. A degree in music " classical violinist". He is not as sexual as I am.
    Yet, with all those differences, we get along like peanut butter and jelly.
    So Yes.... it does work.
    :tongue:
     
  11. ClaireTalon

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    Thank you for your insights. I have been with guys who mostly are like myself, couldn't imagine at all what it would be like with a guy who is my contrary. I guess it boils down to, against all contraries that you two personify, have in common that you won't take them as an offense.
     
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