Conversing with the opposite sex.

[fored]

Inspired by the "Pick up chicks" thread.

One of the worst problems I've had is talking to people, I am what you call an introvert so when it comes to conversing I am totally horrible.

Lately though I've been reading some articles and I'm glad to say that it has somewhat improved slightly so I thought I could open a thread here to see if there are others who can share ideas on how to converse.

It is after all the key to getting to know a woman/guy.

1. Try to get valuable information from the person so that you can spark a topic for conversation.

2. Avoid asking too many questions continuously as it could seem repetitive or even interrogative.

3. Don't shy away from sharing your personal experience or opinions.

4. Don't be afraid to be funny.

Thats all I have for now please feel free to contribute.

If possible, elaborate on what you mean by certain advice. I will post again soon!

 

[ManofThunder]

It is very difficult to converse when you're nervous. It can seem very forced if you're not careful. My advice would be to calm down and go with the flow. It's easy once you get started. For example, when you speak to a close family member (mother, father, brother etc.) the conversation begins naturally and is instinctive. This is because you have grown to know that person and understand that it's fine to say certain things without offending them or ruining your chances of a relationship. Take note of your conversations with family and close friends, note how you open and close a chat. It is important to be yourself; if you try too hard you are not being yourself and have no hope of a true friendship with that person. It's easier said than done, but practice the art of conversation and in time - your inner, charismatic master will shine through. Good luck.

 

[B_ILIW]

too many guys over-complicate talking to women. Women are human beings, they're at the base the same as men.

 

[slab8]

Regarding your point #2, asking questions, open-ended questions, is the easiest way to make conversation. People love to talk about themselves. Listen carefully to her, and choose one thing she says each time to be the basis for your next question. You can get quite personal quickly if you're doin' it right, because women also love to talk about "feelings".
You're right about one thing, if the questions are random and seem like you're scanning your brain for something to say it will seem unnatural.

 

[curious_angel]

Regarding your point #2, asking questions, open-ended questions, is the easiest way to make conversation. People love to talk about themselves. Listen carefully to her, and choose one thing she says each time to be the basis for your next question. You can get quite personal quickly if you're doin' it right, because women also love to talk about "feelings".
You're right about one thing, if the questions are random and seem like you're scanning your brain for something to say it will seem unnatural.

Not everyone likes to talk about themselves. If I feel that I'm being interrogated or pumped for information that is too personal, I'll be making a hasty exit. Keep the initial conversation light.

In my experience making eye contact and smiling, before approaching someone, will make all the difference. I'm not talking about staring or drooling, but holding the other person's gaze for a few seconds and smiling.

 

[AlteredEgo]

I became good at talking to people by practicing. If I had bad conversations during the day, I'd go home, and practice doing that same chat differently. I'd play out as many outcomes as I could think of.