Cougar

Act2_Begins_Now

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Have you heard the term? I suppose I have been living under a rock and for any of those that may have had thier own rock ... as I understand it term to describe an older woman who prefers a younger man.

Are you a Cougar?
Are you offended by the term?
Care to share pros/cons of being a Cougar?
Can a Cougar find true companionship with a younger man?
What do you suppose the age difference should be?
 

whatireallywant

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I hadn't heard the term until recently myself. I guess I'm something of a cougar as I am 44 and am attracted mostly to men in their twenties. But for me it's not exclusive. I can be attracted to men my own age and older too. I'm just mostly attracted to men in their twenties.
 

Act2_Begins_Now

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I find most younger men, more stimulating for my mind. From my very limited experience the younger guys seem to listen better and engage in conversation. Also they seem, for the most part, be interested in making sure the woman is satiated. I suppose I am typecasting and that isn't fair, perhaps the men our age that are like that are taken?
 

whatireallywant

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I find most younger men, more stimulating for my mind. From my very limited experience the younger guys seem to listen better and engage in conversation. Also they seem, for the most part, be interested in making sure the woman is satiated. I suppose I am typecasting and that isn't fair, perhaps the men our age that are like that are taken?

That could be true. The odd thing is that I am usually attracted to younger men, but my longest lasting relationship was with a guy who was over 11 years older than me. He and I are still friends too.
 

vancouvergirl

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Have you heard the term? I suppose I have been living under a rock and for any of those that may have had there own rock ... as I understand it term to describe an older woman who prefers a younger man.

Are you a Cougar?
Are you offended by the term?
Care to share pros/cons of being a Cougar?
Can a Cougar find true companionship with a younger man?
What do you suppose the age difference should be?

I suppose some people would consider me a cougar, but i really am not.

Three years ago, when i was actively polyamorous (i've been on hiatus for the last three years, but am now back!), ALL the guys i dated were between 25 and 30 (i was around 46). It was just luck of the draw. They pursued me, i did NOT pursue them. One led to the other. *shrug*

Pros? I must say i really did enjoy the high libidos. Man, i miss that. And cute? Whoa. My Dom was 16 years younger than me and he was as cute as they come. Long black hair with pink streaks, half Italian, half Filipino . . . *sigh* I was with him for 2 and a half years.

Cons? I think most young guys looking to hook up with older women are just doing it to put a notch on their belts. "I fucked someone my mother's age! Hehe" Sure there are young guys out there who actually prefer older women because they are sick of younger women's drama. But i only dated one guy like that, and he was cheating, so i broke it off. I don't 'do' cheat. Everyone else (except my Dom) just used me. Well, he used me too, but we had a contract saying that it was ok! ;-)

Because i was only dating younger guys for a couple of years, it almost made me feel like i was becoming superficial. Only cute young guys. Until i saw a much older man in the lineup in front of me at a fast food joint. He was joking around with the cashier and was just . . . well, he had spark. He didn't look half bad in his jeans, either. He told the cashier that he had just turned 85. I thought wow - i would date him. I guess i'm not as superficial as i thought! :p

As far as i'm concerned, it really doesn't matter what the age difference is. As long as there is spark. Hell, i would rather date a wrinkly 85 year old man who was happy, easy-going and full of life, than a very cute 25 year old morose guy. It's all about the attitude for me. Well, maybe not JUST attitude. And as long as his dick works quite well and you have fun together . . .

Oh, but that high libido. I reeeeally want that high libido . . . :)
 

vancouvergirl

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I find most younger men, more stimulating for my mind. From my very limited experience the younger guys seem to listen better and engage in conversation. Also they seem, for the most part, be interested in making sure the woman is satiated. I suppose I am typecasting and that isn't fair, perhaps the men our age that are like that are taken?

Damn, where did you find YOUR young guys? I found the absolute opposite. All they wanted was sex and they could not have cared less about what i wanted.

I think that my problem though, to be fair, was that i was a slave at the time and all the guys i dated were friends of my Master. Perhaps they just assumed that they could use me because i was a slave. They were wrong. I was not their slave.

Hmmm. All except the one guy who actually prefered older women that i mentioned in my other post (and who wasn't a friend of my Dom). He was sweet. He listened and cared about what i wanted. Maybe you're right after all. Because he really was the only true test of a young guy for me (other than my Dom). Too bad it ended up that he was cheating on his (also older) girlfriend, so i broke up with him.

I haven't really dated people my own age, so i can't comment on them. I do plan on giving them (well ANY age actually) a try though. Actually, i was always open to all ages. It just happened that only the younger ones asked me out.
 

Act2_Begins_Now

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Damn, where did you find YOUR young guys?

I was only referring sexually to one man. However, through work and work networking I look at the men my age and older compared to the younger men that are in their 30s. The older men are more dull, whereas the younger men seem more together in general.
 

socoken

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Ive fallen prey to a few cougars myself. Im only 24, but for some reason, I meet a lot of attractive women in their 30's and 40's that are just downright aggressive in getting what they want. I dont know how many different times Ive heard the "I can show you things no girl your age has ever dreamed of" line. Most of the time its B.S. but they are sexy and confident, so things are great anyway.
 

whatireallywant

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Ive fallen prey to a few cougars myself. Im only 24, but for some reason, I meet a lot of attractive women in their 30's and 40's that are just downright aggressive in getting what they want. I dont know how many different times Ive heard the "I can show you things no girl your age has ever dreamed of" line. Most of the time its B.S. but they are sexy and confident, so things are great anyway.

I'm not that kind of cougar. I'm 44 but less sexually experienced than most 20 year old women, sad to say. :frown1: I just tend to be attracted more (but not exclusively) to men in their twenties and early thirties.
 

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Guess I'm too young to be a Cougar... lol But good info to know for future reference!

I've never been with an older woman, but find myself attracted to them. So, I say, we should have no fear as older gals or younger guys and/or otherwise. If it works, it works, regardless of age - the beauty of a person trancends boundaries.
 

whatireallywant

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I'm glad that younger men are becoming more open to being with an older woman. I'm not what you normally would think of as a cougar - I'm an older woman who is attracted to younger men, but I am not "experienced" - in fact, most younger women are more experienced than I am! (and this was not my choice - it was just the luck of the draw in my life) I am glad that younger men are more open to older women because as I got older, all the good men my age got married - well, the straight ones anyway. (The old "All the good men are either married or gay! I can certainly relate to that!) I don't fault the men for being married or gay, it's just that I would like to find one who is compatible with me. I still have "young" interests and so a younger man might very well be compatible with me.
 

Pumblechook

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I'm glad that younger men are becoming more open to being with an older woman. I'm not what you normally would think of as a cougar - I'm an older woman who is attracted to younger men, but I am not "experienced" - in fact, most younger women are more experienced than I am! (and this was not my choice - it was just the luck of the draw in my life) I am glad that younger men are more open to older women because as I got older, all the good men my age got married - well, the straight ones anyway. (The old "All the good men are either married or gay! I can certainly relate to that!) I don't fault the men for being married or gay, it's just that I would like to find one who is compatible with me. I still have "young" interests and so a younger man might very well be compatible with me.

As far as not having experience with younger guys... at the same time I'd have to say I see very few guys having experience with older women. So, it is not so much a fault of one side or another or both, but just perhaps a newer acceptance of thought that is coming currently? I can't say as I have heard much about a younger guy/ older gal combination before or done it myself, but I also do not see any reason why it would function differently than any other combination. So, to me experience in that regard is out the window.
 

SpeedoGuy

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I'm glad that younger men are becoming more open to being with an older woman. I'm not what you normally would think of as a cougar - I'm an older woman who is attracted to younger men, but I am not "experienced"

I was always open to it. In my 20s I had a fling or two with women in their 40s. Those flings didn't last long but I sure didn't regret them. :smile:
 

whatireallywant

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As far as not having experience with younger guys... at the same time I'd have to say I see very few guys having experience with older women. So, it is not so much a fault of one side or another or both, but just perhaps a newer acceptance of thought that is coming currently? I can't say as I have heard much about a younger guy/ older gal combination before or done it myself, but I also do not see any reason why it would function differently than any other combination. So, to me experience in that regard is out the window.

I didn't mean that I just didn't have a lot of sexual experience with younger men - I meant that I don't have a lot of sexual experience at all! I don't know how much that is because of my looks, how much is because I'm very shy, and how much is because I have mostly been around very uptight people. I think (hope) it's more the last two than it is the first. I'm working to overcome the shyness. I find that if I'm in a group that is doing a specific activity, like hiking or playing volleyball, I am less shy than I am at, say, a party.

I do think that people are more open to the idea of older women/younger men now. I'm glad of that. I always liked younger men - not exclusively, but always liked them.