Could you love a person with developmental disability?

helgaleena

Sexy Member
Joined
Sep 8, 2006
Posts
5,475
Media
7
Likes
43
Points
193
Location
Wisconsin USA
Sexuality
50% Straight, 50% Gay
Gender
Female
There is a folk song in my region called Too stupid. by Lou and Peter Berryman.

I've had enough trouble with men who defeat me
With partners who want nothing short of a victory
I'm seeking a man who loves simply and strongly
Too stupid to think so too stupid to wrong me.

Too stupid to put himself down
Too stupid to act like a clown
Too stupid to push me around
It's then that I'll know that a husband I've found

And we will be married and we will be happy
And pretty soon we will be mammy and pappy
Looking after the kids won't be much of a bother
They probably won't if they're dumb like their father.

Too stupid to make any noise
Too stupid to break all their toys
Too stupid to trample my heart--
Dumbness will keep us from falling apart.

Our marriage will linger through many a summer,
And I will grow wiser and he will grow dumber.
(2 lines missing)
Too stupid to get in my hair
Too stupid to have an affair
Too stupid to argue with me--
With my dummy hubby it's happy I'll be.

Since I was born very blond I have always been stereotyped at first glance as stupid, because I am also female. It's amazing how many men are frightened if you dispel that first impression and they run away. So in this little song the sexes are reversed, haha. Marrying a stupider person than yourself is a centuries old strategy, innit?


Okej, I remembered the missing part.

And we will grow older through many a summer
And I will grow wiser and he will grow dumber.
And I will thank Fortune and i will thank Cupid
For making my hubby so godawful stupid.


I have a son with Asbergers. He's on the low end of the academic curve even though as an infant a shrink thought he was a genius. Asbergers causes poor social skills and overreactions to external sensory stimuli plus pervasive developmental delay. But I fully expect him to find love and have a career and a circle of friends. Just later on.

And he has a fierce mother until then.
 

Principessa

Expert Member
Joined
Nov 22, 2006
Posts
18,660
Media
0
Likes
138
Points
193
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
i couldnt have an adult romantic type relationship with them. mental prowess, wit, intelligence, and similar mental and verbal characteristics are very important to me in a long term romantic relationship and if the other person was not mentally capable of that level of thought, then i could not love them romantically. now, i would be able to love them more as you would a child or something like that, which isnt less love, just different love
Assuming I understood you correctly I think I agree. :cool:

i think i already do i mean who eats cheerios with a fork?!?
He's defective. Throw him away before he sticks himself in the eye with his cereal fork. :lmao: :kidding:

*SNIP*
I have a son with Asbergers. He's on the low end of the academic curve even though as an infant a shrink thought he was a genius. Asbergers causes poor social skills and overreactions to external sensory stimuli plus pervasive developmental delay. But I fully expect him to find love and have a career and a circle of friends. Just later on.

And he has a fierce mother until then.
My 9 yr old cousin is an Aspie. :smile: He is high functioning but has poor social and gross motor skills. He has issues with textures. Tends to fixate on one topic for months to years at a time; and is sweet, loving, fun, a sore loser, hates homework especially math but is otherwise okay. :cool: I have no idea what life has in store for 'my sweet prince' as I like to call him, but I intend to be there for him every step of the way.
 

thadjock

Mythical Member
Joined
Jun 11, 2006
Posts
4,722
Media
7
Likes
58,995
Points
518
Age
47
Location
LA CA USA
Sexuality
90% Gay, 10% Straight
Gender
Male
He's defective. Throw him away before he sticks himself in the eye with his cereal fork. :lmao: :kidding:
.

ya, it's something about milk control, he "doesnt' like it too wet".

once you stick around more than 2 months in a relationship you learn all the crazy shit about the person who already has you hooked on him and it's too late to get a refund. it's a thin blue line between love and hate.
 

dolfette

Expert Member
Joined
Nov 13, 2006
Posts
11,303
Media
0
Likes
109
Points
193
Sexuality
No Response
does gender make a difference?
if tim had been tina, marrying an older man, would it be awwww?
are we more likely to see a man as being preditory?
or is it more socially acceptable...smart men with bimbos?
 

Principessa

Expert Member
Joined
Nov 22, 2006
Posts
18,660
Media
0
Likes
138
Points
193
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
ya, it's something about milk control, he "doesnt' like it too wet".

once you stick around more than 2 months in a relationship you learn all the crazy shit about the person who already has you hooked on him and it's too late to get a refund. it's a thin blue line between love and hate.
It's the little things that will kill a relationship over time. Leaving the cap off the toothpaste, squeezing it from the middle, instead of neatly rolling up the ends of the tube, wet towels on the floor. Or in the case of one of my ex-boyfriends he had to refrigerate his olive oil. :mad: I swear to you we almost came to blows over this.
 

Mal_the_Wolf

Experimental Member
Joined
Nov 12, 2009
Posts
224
Media
20
Likes
16
Points
53
Location
east coast
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
a horribly un-pc thread title for which i apologise.

but i'm watching a film called 'tim', about an older woman who ends up marrying a young, attractive guy with the mind of a child...

it's a sweet film. quite romantic in a way.

is it abusive? taking advantage?
or can you just love the nature of a person?
could a protective, nurturing relationship benefit both?

hmmmmm...

well the film explores the notion that love isn't a feeling/thought but an actual force like gravity. its sorta of a hard to form an opnion on kinda film