Cow Milking Machines

Discussion in 'Penis Enlargement' started by kickstand, Nov 15, 2010.

  1. kickstand

    kickstand New Member

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    I read posts about vacuum cleaners being used as a thrill or penis pump with noone really advocating it for any long term use. While reading the posts I wondered if anyone had used a cow milking machine. If I was on a dairy farm, I cannot image the temptation to try it out. Anyone?:redface:
     
  2. D_Andy Cornholer

    D_Andy Cornholer Account Disabled

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    I used to live on a farm and i thought about it, but i never did anything lol
     
  3. FuzzyKen

    FuzzyKen New Member

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    A great deal of adapting has to be done on this one because the teat cups are not large enough for most men's penises. However it has been said that the pulsator from a milking machine spliced in between an electric vacuum pump does increase the effectiveness of the pumping session. These are adjustable and again much has been said. If you do net searches on Google you may still come up with quite a bit of information on this one. Machines can be purchased on occasion quite inexpensively off the internet.

    For a time there were several j/o clubs that had modified machines that were used on milking tables nationwide. I remember that one club like this did exist in Los Angeles.

    The cheapest way to find this kind of stuff would be to look on Ebay or Craigs List in ranching areas and see what you can find. Prices for complete units are variable.

    You will need a relatively strong vacuum source to power these however. An automobile AC suction pump should work and these are available from Harbor Freight at relatively low prices as well brand new.

    Good Luck and let the rest of us know how well it works.
     
  4. hsarge

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  5. ThickMushroom

    ThickMushroom New Member

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    Using milking machines and stuff is cool for porn stories but not for reality. Milking machines aren't meant for people's dicks. Its supposed to be like a calf suckling and thats nothing like getting a blow job. The machines do not stroke you but just pulse and suck so there isn't enough friction rubbing on your skin to get you off. You need something like a Venus2000 to do it. Those electro-ejaculators they use on bulls and pigs to make them cum are the same way where it sounds good but not a good idea to try it for real.
     
  6. hairyman101

    hairyman101 New Member

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  7. Calboner

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  8. R3lgrub

    R3lgrub New Member

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    Having grown up on a dairy, I can say with a fair bit of certainty that you'll have a hard time finding a farmer willing to let you try. The health code violations alone would be enough to shut him down for good.

    I used to think about trying it with a calf, they'll suck anything, but was too afraid to try. When they don't get any milk they jam their heads into the udder to stimulate production. I don't think having a calf head but you in the groin would be much fun either.
     
  9. JulieInNaplesFL

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    I can suck the chrom..... nevermine. :biggrin1:
     
  10. RideRocket

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    Something I like about this site is learning about all the crazy shit men will do to their junk just to get off.
     
  11. Calboner

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    This thread needs to be moved to the "Stupid Things to Do with Your Dick" forum.
     
  12. Calboner

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    It seems that no one is going to take advantage of my setup to say:

    "What do you think the 'Penis Enlargement' forum is?"

    Ba da boom.
     
  13. musclebare9

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    I think most brought up on a farm would know that would taint any future milk and get the farm in big trouble. Cow/calves are very curious and will use there tongue to explore just about anything. Their tongues are really rough so I wouldn't even think about letting them lick my dick. They also tend to have runny slobbery noses.
     
  14. MalakingTiti

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    Yeah right. Go ahead and try this if you dare. You're gonna fuck around and have your cock sucked off your body.
     
  15. Xspree

    Xspree New Member

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    Im inlove with Julie's comment and perhaps Julie!!
     
  16. FuzzyKen

    FuzzyKen New Member

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    One can buy an old DeLaval or other brand milking machine and adapt it into a masturbation device. There are many who have done this one with great satisfaction and as I have said in a previous posting adaptations were made by several commercial concerns who opened "milking parlors" as sex clubs in several major cities in the United States. They can be made into a really good sex device, but this is not something one can do by walking into a dairy and "plugging in". Adaptations need to be done with the teat cups because the udders of even larger breeds of dairy cattle are far smaller than the penis of most men.

    If you look there are or were several Yahoo groups that dealt with this and the machine modifications.

    Don't knock it if you had not tried it. . . .
     
  17. be_lover0069

    be_lover0069 New Member

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    what happens if u turn it on 12 and leave it for a little while? lol
     
  18. tgirlsrgreat

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    yeah you can do it, but the only problem is the damn thing doesn't turn off until it gets 2 gallons!!! so be careful!!!!
     
  19. Who_Dun_It

    Who_Dun_It New Member

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    That cold have....interesting.....results:redface:
     
  20. dad4you

    dad4you Member

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    I lived on a farm and had a calf suck on me.. it was PAINFUL.. I was only 15..