Current bf size and ex bf size

[Sexychick517]

Recently I finally admitted to my bf that I had bigger than him before. He always asked me so I finally admitted that I had (he's about average and I've had 8 inches before). Anyway he's acting really weird and jealous about it, asking me if it felt much better and stuff like that...
I'm sure I'm not the only one that has had to deal with this, so do you guys or girls have any ideas about what I could tell him that would make it a little better? Thanks

 

[amhersthungboi]

To quote an old adage ... it's not the size of the ship but the motion of the ocean. Someone can be huge and just not be good in bed -- perhaps remind him of that. Plus, the emotional intimacy of the sex always makes it better. Not many men buy the "size doesn't matter" line, but you can tell him that you still enjoy the sex becaues he's good at it and because he's him.
If he still feels inadequate, perhaps this situation is hitting at deeper feelings of inadequacy than just his penis.

 

[Alecia19]

Personally i would have to agree with the guy posted just before me on this. Just because a guy whose hung bigger than another doesnt necessarily mean he's gonna be better in bed. I'm not sure there's anything you can really do because this is more his problem than your's!!! If he's insecure which to me it appears i guess maybe continue to re-assure him (only if true, don't lie) that he pleases you.

 

[RideRocket]

Recently I finally admitted to my bf that I had bigger than him before. He always asked me so I finally admitted that I had (he's about average and I've had 8 inches before). Anyway he's acting really weird and jealous about it, asking me if it felt much better and stuff like that...
I'm sure I'm not the only one that has had to deal with this, so do you guys or girls have any ideas about what I could tell him that would make it a little better? Thanks

In addition, I would stress to him that it was your EX boyfriend. While he may have had a bigger penis, there were other qualities about him that just weren't compatible with you and that's why you are no longer with him.

Tell your current boyfriend that you are with him because of who he is and how he makes you feel - it's the 'total' package concept.

_______________
Then when you're about to break up with him, tell him it's because he has a small dick and that you were lying all along... :joke:

 

[B_Hickboy]

Yuck. My ex used to talk about her ex's 9.5 inches. It really didn't bother me, though, because he has a premature ejaculation problem - often goes off before he can get it all the way in. So he may have had an inch on me, but it wasn't doing him any good. In fact, she used to say just that, asking, "What good does it do to have all that if you can't do anything with it?"

I hope your current guy is caring and willing to learn how to satisfy you. After all, the biggest sex organ is the brain, as my bride to be is fond of saying. Sex is 95% mental, anyway. I know, because I've had sex with somebody who was 100% mental!

That makes no sense at all, but it made me laugh, so I left it in.

HickboysGirl loves me and never leaves me in doubt about anything. That alone makes EVERYTHING I do with her incredible, from the trout stream to the kitchen to the movie theatre to the restaurant to the bedroom. Even to the altar.

I hope your guy understands that you're with him by choice, that you left the other guy over other issues, and that you are not so shallow that you would choose a partner based on the size of his cock.

Then when you break up with him, tell him it's because he has a small dick and you were lying all along, as riderocket says. I've had it done to me before. :doh: :cockblockedsad: Some people can be so cruel.

 

[B_horribleperson]

Then when you break up with him, tell him it's because he has a small dick and you were lying all along, as riderocket says. .

hahahahahahahahahahaha






just tell him that even tho his penis is smaller that he is a MUCH better lover then your ex.

 

[B_gagger]

As long as you deep-down, honestly don't care, I wouldn't be too concerned. He'll get that assurance from you over time. If any part of you wishes that he were bigger like previous experience, I would address those feelings openly and honestly with him as you feel comfortable.

 

[B_HallWildcat]

I can't exactly relate to how your bf must feel, but my X gf, always made comments about my size to me and her friends, and often compared me to other partners she has had, telling me how much bigger i was, but I'm a big guy in general too, 6'2, broad build, and she likes smaller scranny guys, (still dont know why she was with me) so the next partner she has might get some grap about his size, so i feel bad for him already.

But for your bf, i would just advise you to not make a big deal about size, and you telling him about another bigger guy you have had is going to shake his confidence, so if you are concerned with his feelings, maybe try complimenting his other talents a lot, to boost his esteem.

 

[GottaBigOne]

One thing I think is important about this is that to most men, if not all, penis size and how confident we are in our penises has no relation whatsoever to how it performs sexually. Psychologically it is bigger is better, because its a status symbol, a symbol of virility(even if in actuality it is detrimental sexually) and whether or not it gives a woman more pleasure than another, if it is still smaller it will affect most men. Because we all know that penis size has little to do with giving most females an orgasm (because most women orgasm clitorally) the size, in relation to sexual performance, is also of little consequence to us.

The thing I think probably most affects those that take their penis sizes too seriously is a lack of genuine self-esteem in other areas. For someone who has a lot going for them in their lives, the size of their penis is probably of no consideration to them. Lets face it, the size of the penis, unless it is tiny or absolutely unusably huge, is a non-factor in most satisfying sex. It can enhance or detract, but ultimately size doesn't matter, so the only role penis size can then play is that of competition with other males. Its the same mentality that goes along with the alpha male syndrome of having to beat other men up, or to be physically imposing. Anyone who has to come to conclusions about their own self worth in comparison to others has a self esteem issue. Penis size is just another way this issue manifests itself.

 

[bigdude]

Come to me, I'll satisfy you...AHEM, I mean..umm...gottabigone- that was a great post, and I have to agree with every word this fine man spoke

 

[kurios]

Tell him to grow up!

 

[deleted3272]

Well You have to see it his way too I mean what if he told you his Ex was tighter than you or gave better head? I know bigger dosent allways make a better lover but people put alot of emphasis on size.

 

[rob_just_rob]

This is one of those questions that you should have probably have avoided answering.

Unfortunately, from reading your initial post, it sounds like he was hounding you for an answer despite your attempts to not answer. It would seem that this is an insecurity of his that goes beyond a casual curiosity.

I agree with the other posters who said that you should reassure him that you want to be with him, not the ex. However... if he can't let it go (and I suspect that he can't), there may not be much you can do.

 

[D_Elijah_MorganWood]

Guys shouldn't ask this unless they are prepared for the answer. More likely than not (unless you're huge), whomever you're asking has had a bigger dick than yours. The only right answer to this question is: "oh honey, you're the hugest I've ever had, nobody else even came close!". This would leave most women (and gay men) lying their asses off.

If you get someone like Madame Zora, she'll probably have them all arranged by size and tell you HOW MANY were bigger than yours and how much larger they were.

Thankfully my current squeeze isn't the biggest I've ever fucked but the biggest of my boyfriends so I can at least sound good if he ever asks.

In the words of Chris Rock, "Just be glad you're gettin' some".

 

[madame_zora]

Guys shouldn't ask this unless they are prepared for the answer. More likely than not (unless you're huge), whomever you're asking has had a bigger dick than yours. The only right answer to this question is: "oh honey, you're the hugest I've ever had, nobody else even came close!". This would leave most women (and gay men) lying their asses off.

If you get someone like Madame Zora, she'll probably have them all arranged by size and tell you HOW MANY were bigger than yours and how much larger they were.

Thankfully my current squeeze isn't the biggest I've ever fucked but the biggest of my boyfriends so I can at least sound good if he ever asks.

In the words of Chris Rock, "Just be glad you're gettin' some".

You cracked me up with that one!

Absolutely, positively, NO guy has a right to ask a question then brood about your honest answer. If he didn't want to know he shouldn't have asked. Now, I'm the wrong person to listen to because I would never be in a relationship to begin with, but in all honestly that's one of the big reasons. I refuse to spend my time rubbing someone's ass over their insecurites. That's a stupid way to spend time. I'd tell him it annoys you that he brings it up and you wish you'd never said anything, seeing what a whiner he's being. Then ask him if he's ever had a girlfriend with bigger tits, and go into details about every other act he's performed with other women, and bring it up over and over until he pukes. That should do the trick.

 

[edeneyes]

You cracked me up with that one!

Absolutely, positively, NO guy has a right to ask a question then brood about your honest answer. If he didn't want to know he shouldn't have asked. Now, I'm the wrong person to listen to because I would never be in a relationship to begin with, but in all honestly that's one of the big reasons. I refuse to spend my time rubbing someone's ass over their insecurites. That's a stupid way to spend time. I'd tell him it annoys you that he brings it up and you wish you'd never said anything, seeing what a whiner he's being. Then ask him if he's ever had a girlfriend with bigger tits, and go into details about every other act he's performed with other women, and bring it up over and over until he pukes. That should do the trick.

Yah know, I think the one possibility that nobody usually considers when this topic is raised (and I've been lurkng here for like 5+ years, so I know all the topics) is that just maybe he's turned on by the thought, but can't quite come out and say that. Maybe he wants to know how it feels because he's curious about bigger dicks...

A bi-curious or just big-dick curious guy that doesn't want to admit it can hide his personal curiosity by asking about it like this, maybe even pretending to be upset about it. Bottom line: there are tons of big-dick porno videos that are very popular with straight guys, presumably some of which have gf's, so don't assume he's jealous.

Any open minded guy should be able to live with the fact that he's not well endowed if that's the case, and similarly admit a fascination with big dicks if that actually exists. Then again, how many str8 acting guys are really open minded about sex?

Okay so I rambled about 10x more than I usually do when I post... which is like once every 6 months... sorry, taking my 6" and tucking it now...

 

[B_big dirigible]

Trouble. Big trouble. He shouldn't have asked, and you shouldn't have told him. "Don't ask, don't tell" - wisest adage in the English language. Well, except for Lord Acton's dictum, and anything from Groucho Marx, Ambrose Bierce, or Robert Benchley. But I digress. All you can do now is unplug the 'phone, sell the TV, cancel your ISP, change your name, and move to an interval-ownership condo in São Paulo. Next time you'll know better.

 

[D_Elijah_MorganWood]

is that just maybe he's turned on by the thought, but can't quite come out and say that.

True but rare. Very rare.

 

[AlteredEgo]

is that just maybe he's turned on by the thought, but can't quite come out and say that.

True but rare. Very rare.

Actually, a huge chunk of my clients have this fantasy. It falls into the cuckhold catergory. Like, have you ever imagined how hot it would be to watch your sexy lover having sex with other people, or doing kinky things with other peope and loving it? That would fit into that catergory too. Women do it as well. A very close friend of mine has small breasts, and masturbates to the fantasy that her boyfriend is cheating on her with large-breasted women. Anyway, in my experience, tons of men have cuckhold fantasies, and of those that have that kind of fantasy, 99% of them (regardless of their own penis size) fantasize that the other man or men have larger penises than they do themselves.

Not rare. Not rare at all.

To the original poster:
I think you must continue to be honest, and that includes being honest about this frustration. Maybe you should show him this thread (if you think he'd be okay with knowing you brought your concerns to a "public" forum). Maybe you could show him measurection.com which has tons of advice and support for small and average men, and those who love them. (And by "show" I do mean "accidentally" leaving the browser open to an appropriate thread on that site.) In fact, you yourself might want to head over there, where this question comes up frequently, and where it is answered by men with small and average penises.

Good luck, sweetie.

 

[D_Elijah_MorganWood]

Bronx, I believe you. I must be fatigued or something, I left the whole Cuckold aspect out of this discussion.


"My face is red, I stand corrected"

BTW if you don't mind me asking:
Dominitrix?