Hey everyone,
I rarely post, but I have seen many older posts on this topic and wanted to revive the conversation, because I’m sure it can help positive and negative guys. I myself was diagnosed as being positive when I was around 23 years old. As soon as I found out, I was in total shock. It was like a rock bottom moment for me and reminded me that I wasn’t invincible. It only took one lapse of judgment to change my life forever. After starting treatment, I became undetectable. I thought I That I had overcome the first big obstacle, but little did I know that dating with the stigma would be the hardest challenge yet. I have tried many dating sites and I’m very upfront about my status on my profiles, because I think it is easier to be upfront about my status because it is just one small part of me, but doesn’t define me as a person. However I learned quickly that a lot of guys on these sites thought the opposite. I would receive the craziest messages, ranging from me being a slut and deserving what I had, to people telling me I shouldn’t even be on these sites and apps because people like me desire to infect others with the disease. I understand that there are people who have fears of HIV but it doesn’t give them the privelage to be cruel. Speaking for myself, after my diagnosis, I was broken. I felt that I couldn’t trust a guy ever again, that I was considered ruined and no guy would ever want me. And receiving these kind of messages made everything so much worse. I hope that people who send these cruel messages or judge positive people understand that they are kicking people who are already down, which can lead to self harm, suicide, and even worse. I’m 30 now and I can’t say that things are easier at all. I have been single for about 5 years. Either I receive hate messages, messages asking questions about how I contracted the disease, or guys who just want to hookup because they think positive guys are easy. It’s totally not the case. We are people just like you, looking for our fairytale ending if that even exists. If I can only get one thing across is to be kind to others, educate yourselves, and if you encounter a positive person on a dating site or an app, treat them like you would treat any other person, with kindness and respect. Now that I got that off my chest, is there any other positive guys on here who can shed some light on dating with HIV. If you have found a relationship and or are dating with HIV, do you have any strategies on how to date and overcome the stigma. Also are there any negative people who have dated or are open to dating positive people, and are willing to share their experience?
I rarely post, but I have seen many older posts on this topic and wanted to revive the conversation, because I’m sure it can help positive and negative guys. I myself was diagnosed as being positive when I was around 23 years old. As soon as I found out, I was in total shock. It was like a rock bottom moment for me and reminded me that I wasn’t invincible. It only took one lapse of judgment to change my life forever. After starting treatment, I became undetectable. I thought I That I had overcome the first big obstacle, but little did I know that dating with the stigma would be the hardest challenge yet. I have tried many dating sites and I’m very upfront about my status on my profiles, because I think it is easier to be upfront about my status because it is just one small part of me, but doesn’t define me as a person. However I learned quickly that a lot of guys on these sites thought the opposite. I would receive the craziest messages, ranging from me being a slut and deserving what I had, to people telling me I shouldn’t even be on these sites and apps because people like me desire to infect others with the disease. I understand that there are people who have fears of HIV but it doesn’t give them the privelage to be cruel. Speaking for myself, after my diagnosis, I was broken. I felt that I couldn’t trust a guy ever again, that I was considered ruined and no guy would ever want me. And receiving these kind of messages made everything so much worse. I hope that people who send these cruel messages or judge positive people understand that they are kicking people who are already down, which can lead to self harm, suicide, and even worse. I’m 30 now and I can’t say that things are easier at all. I have been single for about 5 years. Either I receive hate messages, messages asking questions about how I contracted the disease, or guys who just want to hookup because they think positive guys are easy. It’s totally not the case. We are people just like you, looking for our fairytale ending if that even exists. If I can only get one thing across is to be kind to others, educate yourselves, and if you encounter a positive person on a dating site or an app, treat them like you would treat any other person, with kindness and respect. Now that I got that off my chest, is there any other positive guys on here who can shed some light on dating with HIV. If you have found a relationship and or are dating with HIV, do you have any strategies on how to date and overcome the stigma. Also are there any negative people who have dated or are open to dating positive people, and are willing to share their experience?