Dealing with annoying people at nude beaches

AMTZ410213

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I had the opportunity to visit Black's Beach in San Diego this weekend, and for the first time in the two years I've been going I had to deal with an annoying guy that wouldn't leave me alone. This guy wasn't exactly a creep, but he wouldn't take the hint that I wasn't interested in talking to him. Before anyone fires off the "you were in an area known for cruising, what did you expect?" response, I'm not complaining about what happened. What I would like is some advice from others on this board on how to handle someone like this next time. So here's what happened...

This guy walks up and starts in with the usual conversation starters like if I visit often, if it was a long drive to get there and so on. I give short answers and generally avoid eye contact to convey my lack of interest, but this guy keeps talking. He starts with offering all sorts of commentary and compliments about my body. He must be blind because I'm not that fit. He said I had a nice bubble butt, but I don't know how he knew because I had been seated the entire time I talked with him. After a good long awkward silence he also complimented my pubic hair which was strange. (It's just trimmed, nothing special.) He also went into detail about the other people around us commenting on their bodies and what he wanted to do to them, which mostly consisted of grabbing lots of asses. Finally, he moved on to politics and tried to find out what political labels he could apply to me. He told me that he thinks I'm a "Log Cabin Republican" which seemed uncalled for. I'm actually 0% Republican and only 30& log cabin, just check my profile. The conversation finally ended when he had to go pee behind a bush. For being a self proclaimed voyeur he sure was stingy about putting on a show for others to watch. While he was away I took the opportunity to get dressed and take away his incentive to hang out and talk more. He left shortly after that.

So how do the other nude beach goers here on LPSG handle these types of people? I'm looking forward to reading some good stories and advice in the comments below. Thanks!
 

CDraco

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Unfortunately had to deal with people like this, but not as extreme as your situation. It’s hard to be assertive without seeming like an ass. Sometimes I think it’s best to offer a simple exit like “excuse me,” and then just walk off, don’t wait for a response. Even if it’s not far away. No reason for the excuse, just the excuse itself. It happens again, then repeat. Awkward? Maybe.. but it gives you a chance of freedom at least
 

hot showers

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"you were in an area known for cruising, what did you expect?"
If anyone says this they don't get it. Just because your naked, even in a cruisy environment, it doesn't mean that social norms about interaction don't apply.

If someone wants to quietly enjoy the site of my dick from the next towel, go for it...that's part of the pleasure of nude beaches, but if you want to actively interact, social norms regarding mutual interest in such interaction are as applicable as in a clothed environment.
 

Mikehard9

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Only went to nudust beach once in Uk and it was pretty stressful

The beach was half empty when we git there , sat with boyfriend ....and random people kept walking past us and trying to sit right next to us ....bear in mind the beach was half emoty plenty of places to sit .....we moved to different area ...

It was stressful as all we wanted was a quiet day at beach and pervy weirdos and creeps harassed us the whole time - some people have no boundaries or manners .
 
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HorsemanUK

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I think you did your best by giving short disinterested answers. It happens its just some people don't take the hint, as others have said only other exit would be to simply excuse your self and walk away.
 

bkmuscledad

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I think you did your best by giving short disinterested answers. It happens its just some people don't take the hint, as others have said only other exit would be to simply excuse your self and walk away.
That's one way, but the only problem with that, Ben, is that if he was sitting there first, enjoying the spot he had selected, it's not really fair for him to have to change. Better to make it clearer (some people don't understand subtlety, unfortunately), and let him know you want this time to be alone.
 
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AMTZ410213

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I think you both (@Ben_c and @bkmuscledad) make good points.Things were slightly more complicated at the moment because this guy had asked me to stand up because he wanted a better look at my body. I really was stuck between the choices of staying seated and denying him the view he asked for, or getting up and walking away and risking him following me. It was a no-win situation. The good part of the story is after the annoying guy left I started talking with one of the other guys there and really enjoyed the last 30 minutes or so of my day.
 

HorsemanUK

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That's one way, but the only problem with that, Ben, is that if he was sitting there first, enjoying the spot he had selected, it's not really fair for him to have to change. Better to make it clearer (some people don't understand subtlety, unfortunately), and let him know you want this time to be alone.

Yes you could just make it clear that way. I assumed however, the op was asking for ways to deal with it when you're not comfortable being so direct and potentially 'rude'.
 

Shepardson

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He also went into detail about the other people around us commenting on their bodies and what he wanted to do to them, which mostly consisted of grabbing lots of asses.
Monty Python could've done the shit out of that guy. :yum

- Not that I don't sympathize with you and respect that you didn't want to be a dick to him. It's just funny to imagine as an outsider.
 
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bkmuscledad

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Yes you could just make it clear that way. I assumed however, the op was asking for ways to deal with it when you're not comfortable being so direct and potentially 'rude'.
Agreed. I think today we have a duty to introduce polite disagreement whenever possible. It's a dying art.
 
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deleted972421

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I always bring a book. That way when someone comes along, you have a perfect reason to end the conversation by saying "excuse me, I'm at a critical point in this book, do you mind if I continue reading?" To really freak him out, put a cover on the book that identifies it as the Holy Bible.
 

AMTZ410213

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I always bring a book. That way when someone comes along, you have a perfect reason to end the conversation by saying "excuse me, I'm at a critical point in this book, do you mind if I continue reading?" To really freak him out, put a cover on the book that identifies it as the Holy Bible.
Damn! I had my iPad with a book I’m reading on it with me. I should have thought of that. Thanks!
 

NCbear

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Or you could pretend to be even weirder than him.

For example:

“Stop talking! I need to listen to the voices in my head so I can do what they tell me.”

Or:

“No, sorry, I only have sex with camels.”

NCbear (who sometimes thinks an offensive or overly persistent approach from a poorly socialized person should receive a similar response)
 

HOU_HEADHUNTER

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The solutions here can be applied to everyday life. I've dealt with these same kind of guys when I'm at the gym or just out and about and I generally avoid eye contact or pretend that something else is in need of my attention. Out comes my cell and I began texting some imaginary person. I'll get very creative in coming up with ways to get somewhere else. If they continue to follow I would have no choice but to politely tell them I'm not interested. Most people get the clue when their attention is unwanted but there are those that don't seem to get it and will be annoyingly persistent.
 
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Buddie

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Only went to nudust beach once in Uk and it was pretty stressful

The beach was half empty when we git there , sat with boyfriend ....and random people kept walking past us and trying to sit right next to us ....bear in mind the beach was half emoty plenty of places to sit .....we moved to different area ...

It was stressful as all we wanted was a quiet day at beach and pervy weirdos and creeps harassed us the whole time - some people have no boundaries or manners .

You are totally correct