Dealing with friend's SOs

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by edonline, Sep 3, 2007.

  1. edonline

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    Has anyone had the experience where you find it troubling dealing with a friend's significant other? A friend of mine, who I've known for close to 20 yers, has been seeing a guy for about 5 years. The problem is, is that this guy is becoming more and more unbearable to be around (and this also has come from other mutual friends). This guy is very opinionated -- if you say the sky is blue, he'll say it's green just to take the opposite to start a debate. Saturday, a few of us were talking about the growing population in certain parts of the world and how people are starving because of the environment, etc and this guy actually snorted and said "Nobody is starving for lack of food. It's all politics, with the local government holding the food for themselves". Several people walked away, under the guise of going into the house for refreshments. When the talk turned to something else, he did the same thing, basically telling the other speaker that they were wrong.

    I also knew that this friend's SO's politics were conservative but on Sunday, when a bunch of us were visiting his new place, we saw his bookcases. Immediately, I said "Oh no!" when I saw the bold name of "Coulter" on several book spines. Also on the shelves were books by Pat Buchanan as well as several books on Ronald Reagan ("Reagan: The Man, The Legend").

    If it were only two incidents, I could probably just let them pass but it seems like something always comes to leave a bitter taste whenever this guy is around because he comes off as opinionated and acting superior to everyone else and this past weekend just magnified it. I'm afraid that soon someone will notbe able to hold back and will verbally attack him. Any ideas on how to deal with this, short of avoiding him (and my close friend) all together?
     
  2. D_Cliebert_Chodechoker

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    Ill tell u what if someone is a negative influence on you, or u dont like being around them then dont be around them. If someone is also so ignorant as to not be able to change their opionion when they are clearly wrong then let them live with that. I would not be around the person. Thats just my opinion. I guess it all comes down to how much he really bugs you. if its enough to dirve you to the point you dread seeing the person then avoid em.
     
  3. Shiningdog

    Shiningdog New Member

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    Axe him if he'd like for you to give him a couple free acres, and when he says yes, then kick him in the nuts.
     
  4. Osiris

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    Been there done that. You have to walk away.

    I had a friend who married this completely domaneering woman. Myself and another buddy were not married. Well he kept wanting to hang out with us. We would say about midnight "Shouldn't you et home to the wife?" He would always say it was OK. Everytime this happened, we could count on his wife calling our houses, cussing us out because WE kept him out late. We tried to tell her that he wanted to stay out later and we were trying to get him home earlier. Our friends lack of a pair of testicles lead to her calling us liars.

    We had finally had enough and one day he comes up to us and says "Where we kicking it tonight?" I spoke up and said, "We're going to Westport. You need to go home." He protested and said he had his house under control. Needless to say we went out without him. He followed us, wife followed him. Wife saw us telling him to get lost and go home to his wife since he was such a piss ant. She got pissy and he finally left.

    As long as your friend chooses to be witbh this person, you are kind of SOL. Try talking to the friend aside from the guy and see what his take on things is.
     
  5. edonline

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    I can deal with the politics somewhat. I'm always up for a good debate as long as it's civilized and intelligent. But one of the problems is that my friend's bf recently went back to college and it seems like he looks down at everone at times (although most of my friends have had higher education, only one has a college degree). Just little things he says and does, plus attitude. At his housewarming this past Sunday, one of my other friends didn't want to go. Luckily, he had a valid excuse but we others were thinking of ways to get out of going, but decided we should go, out of courtesy to our lifelong friend. Doubt we'll be going back to his bf's place.
     
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