Dear in the headlights!!! Gay men sleepin' wit' yo man!!!!

[invisibleman]

Hey ladies of LPSG--

Invisi here.

How would you feel if you came home and discovered your man (hubby or beau) having sex with another man?

I will tell you what I did to my ex when he cheated on me. I whupped my ex's ass in front of the guy he fucked on me with.

I had soooo much fun doing it. And it was long overdue.
​

How would you feel about gay guys or bisexuals wanting your man?

 

[D_Fiona_Farvel]

My BF has a soft Ed Kowalczyk look, so I am sure he's popular with men and they can want all they like.

If I came home and found him in bed with another man?
Barebacking? A vicious ass beating handed out to both.
Protected? Perhaps a beating because they're in my house w/o my knowing. Likely just kick them both out, the BF might be able to return. Definitely not going to permanently harm anyone, I don't care that much... not about my boyfriend necessarily, just about sex outside of the relationship.

You have stumped me, Invisi. :shrug:

 

[invisibleman]

My BF has a soft Ed Kowalczyk look, so I am sure he's popular with men and they can want all they like.

If I came home and found him in bed with another man?
Barebacking? A vicious ass beating handed out to both.
Protected? Perhaps a beating because they're in my house w/o my knowing. Likely just kick them both out, the BF might be able to return. Definitely not going to permanently harm anyone, I don't care that much... not about my boyfriend necessarily, just about sex outside of the relationship.

You have stumped me, Invisi. :shrug:

Don't be perplexed. I didn't permanently harm the ex. I just whupped his ass. That is all.
Color me evil.

There are threads on here about gay men wanting straight men. Straight women must tolerate it better because their man is fucking a gay man. Maybe it isn't good if the beau is fucking another woman instead.

 

[Gisella]

I do not mind people desiring "my guy", I do desire a bunch of people also...but having him is another story..I would not tolerate finding out cheating situation, in my bed worse, comming from any gender..makes no difference being men or women. I do not plan having any open relationship by the time I become a couple again..for this motive I do remain single..less dramas and complications.

 

[invisibleman]

I do not mind people desiring "my guy", I do desire a bunch of people also...but having him is another story..I would not tolerate finding out cheating situation, in my bed worse, comming from any gender..makes no difference being men or women. I do not plan having any open relationship by the time I become a couple again..for this motive I do remain single..less dramas and complications.

Oh, I agree with you, Gisella.


I just wanted to get women's perspective on this phenomenon. I, as ONE guy who is homosexual...am not out there trying to fuck a straight guy.


There are people creating threads about the gay guys trying to score straight guys and I am like "ARE WOMEN AWARE OF THIS SORT OF THING AND TOLERATE IT?"

 

[izzycajun]

I know a lot of bisexual women but I can't think of a single bisexual man. Do you girls encounter a lot of bisexual men? Incidentally, to answer your question, I think I'd be too shocked to react. Wish I could say I'd kick someone's ass but I think I would just freak out about my BF being gay since I don't know any bisexual men.

 

[D_Fiona_Farvel]

Oh, I agree with you, Gisella.


I just wanted to get women's perspective on this phenomenon. I, as ONE guy who is homosexual...am not out there trying to fuck a straight guy.


There are people creating threads about the gay guys trying to score straight guys and I am like "ARE WOMEN AWARE OF THIS SORT OF THING AND TOLERATE IT?"

I tend to skip over a lot and was not aware of the threads, Invisi. What's worse? Gay guys trying to turn out & steal your man or some ho? :shrug: I do not see the difference as both are predatory.

In one sense, I am fortunate that my boyfriend does not cheat, but we have certainly discussed his options while he's living out of the country and I'm not opposed to his engaging in safer casual sex. But, she should know that he tells me everything, so if she (or he) tried to break up our relationship, I'm not above hopping an international flight and restoring order with a foot in someone's ass. :smile:

I do not mind people desiring "my guy", I do desire a bunch of people also...but having him is another story..I would not tolerate finding out cheating situation, in my bed worse, comming from any gender..makes no difference being men or women. I do not plan having any open relationship by the time I become a couple again..for this motive I do remain single..less dramas and complications.

You're smart, beautiful, and fun, I can't image why anyone would cheat. :05:

 

[tasteslikejellyjam]

I know a lot of bisexual women but I can't think of a single bisexual man. Do you girls encounter a lot of bisexual men? Incidentally, to answer your question, I think I'd be too shocked to react. Wish I could say I'd kick someone's ass but I think I would just freak out about my BF being gay since I don't know any bisexual men.

I think bisexual men are like unicorns...
its a wonderful idea but doesn't actually exist..
they usually go one way or another...
all the ones I met turned full gay but claimed to be bi because they didn't mind touching titties...
guess what??
some gay men love groping titties just because they can...
doesn't make them bi...
I can see more women being bi on a subconscious level...
it only makes sense to group with other women for rearing reasons...
so I can see it as a bonding mechanism...
but not in men...
(WTF is up with my Discovery Channel PSAs tonight???)
anyways...
I think bi men are a myth most of the time...
although I dated a guy who loved my doing him in the butt & wanted a threesome with a trans...
but he thought men were icky...
its like asking Mr. Owl how many licks it takes to the center of a tootsy pop...
everyone has their own way of getting there...
so the world may never know...

 

[ManlyBanisters]

There are plenty of bisexual men - it is precisely the prejudices in both the gay and straight communities that men HAVE to be one way or the other that make bi men far less inclined to reveal their bisexuality to people. The 'Eeeew you fuck men!!' / 'Eeeew you fuck women!!' mentality from both communities is stupid. Cut them some slack, folks.

To answer the OP: If I came home and found my guy fucking another man I'd give you and him a damn good talking to for starting without me :wink:

No, seriously - I don't think I'd be any more or less pissed off to find my guy balls deep in a man than I would to find him balls deep in a woman. As to what I'd do, I think I'd probably just turn around and walk out. Would I be more surprised that it was a man? Well, yeah. More upset, shocked, hurt? No.

 

[invisibleman]

There are plenty of bisexual men - it is precisely the prejudices in both the gay and straight communities that men HAVE to be one way or the other that make bi men far less inclined to reveal their bisexuality to people. The 'Eeeew you fuck men!!' / 'Eeeew you fuck women!!' mentality from both communities is stupid. Cut them some slack, folks.


It isn't <my Stewie from FAMILY GUY voice> "Ewwww, you are fucking men or Ewww, you are fucking women"</my Stewie from FAMILY GUY voice>,

It is mostly..."Why couldn't you tell me that you wanted to fuck other men? He kept me in the dark while I was being faithful to him."

About my ex situation two or three months prior to getting the rude awakening, HE wondered if I had anyone else on the side. And told him that I didn't. He wanted monogamy. I was cool with that. We never had an open relationship agreement. We had taken HIV tests. We were together for six years. On three separate occasions, he was furious over guys looking at me?! I didn't flirt with any of those guys either.

To answer the OP: If I came home and found my guy fucking another man I'd give you and him a damn good talking to for starting without me :wink:

Bianca, I am not fixing tea and crumpets for David and Mick. That fucker could've told me how he felt. My ex just didn't want to tell me. He was wrong in what he did. He could've told me that he was fucking around.

No, seriously - I don't think I'd be any more or less pissed off to find my guy balls deep in a man than I would to find him balls deep in a woman.

Well, I guess you would. Some people would be cool with it. NOT ME.

As to what I'd do, I think I'd probably just turn around and walk out. Would I be more surprised that it was a man? Well, yeah. More upset, shocked, hurt? No.

Bianca, I am not fixing tea and crumpets for David and Mick. :smile:

 

[invisibleman]

I tend to skip over a lot and was not aware of the threads, Invisi. What's worse? Gay guys trying to turn out & steal your man or some ho? :shrug: I do not see the difference as both are predatory.

Yeah, I agree. THAT IS THE WORD. PREDATOR. :smile:

In one sense, I am fortunate that my boyfriend does not cheat, but we have certainly discussed his options while he's living out of the country and I'm not opposed to his engaging in safer casual sex.

This wasn't a case of living and working overseas though and having options. Which I do understand.

My ex situation was an issue of not telling me how he felt and what he was doing. Essentially (in metaphor)...

He kept an appearance of devotion
while docking in ports in various oceans.:biggrin1:
​

But, she should know that he tells me everything, so if she (or he) tried to break up our relationship, I'm not above hopping an international flight and restoring order with a foot in someone's ass. :smile:

Oh, I wouldn't do that. I would coerce the international homewrecka to fly here and have the homewrecka get a hotel room. ROOM SERVICE!!! And I roll up in there serving him his asswhuppin'. All on his dime.

 

[ManlyBanisters]

Praps I'm misunderstanding the question here.

I thought you were asking how women (of which I am one :smile would feel if we came home and find our (presumably) straight bf/husband with a man.

My simple answer to that is exactly the same as I would feel if I found him with a woman but slightly surprised that it was a man and not a woman.

I thought you were asking would I react differntly to him screwing a man as opposed to a woman. No. Cheating is cheating - the technicality of what is inserted into what is neither here nor there.

But your reply to my above post makes me think maybe you were asking in general about reactions to infidelity. Like I said, I would walk out - I need processing time.

And of course your man was not right to insist on and agree to monogamy and then go back on that. Maybe he was so bummed (no pun intended) about other guys looking at you because he was externalising his own desires for other men on to you - assuming you felt how he did.

EDIT: Oh and BTW, my opening paragraph on my first post, about prejudice towards bi men, was certainly not directed at you, invisi.

 

[EllieP]

My husband has already admitted to a couple of homosexual episodes where he was an interested bystander, more or less. Seems a lot more men are drawn to his size than women, but now it's mine, and I'm not a good sharer.

Yes, I would be surprised, horrified, cheated and would kick his ass from here to Timbuktu.

The reality is that I have a lot more gay male friends than he does (I'm an interior designer - it's in the job description) and yes, some do love my breasts. But they have no idea what Cap has in his pants and I aim to keep it that way.

 

[snappy]

YAWN! Next.

 

[invisibleman]

Praps I'm misunderstanding the question here.

I thought you were asking how women (of which I am one :smile would feel if we came home and find our (presumably) straight bf/husband with a man.

My simple answer to that is exactly the same as I would feel if I found him with a woman but slightly surprised that it was a man and not a woman.

I thought you were asking would I react differntly to him screwing a man as opposed to a woman. No. Cheating is cheating - the technicality of what is inserted into what is neither here nor there.

But your reply to my above post makes me think maybe you were asking in general about reactions to infidelity. Like I said, I would walk out - I need processing time.

Well, I tried to find out why he was acting funny. I kept asking him what the problem was. HE felt that I didn't need to know. I was like "Man, you should fucking tell me what is going on!" It was two months of that going on back and forth. And one night, I totally found out. I told him that he could've told me that he wanted to fuck other men. All I wanted was to find out. I told him that it was selfish of him to fuck all of these other guys while I wasn't doing it with anyone. If he had just told me a long time ago.

And of course your man was not right to insist on and agree to monogamy and then go back on that. Maybe he was so bummed (no pun intended) about other guys looking at you because he was externalising his own desires for other men on to you - assuming you felt how he did.

About the ex. If you only knew all that I have experienced with that guy...I think that the logical progression would've been a foot in his ass, too. But I am happy that I am not around him. I TOTALLY WISHED THAT HE HADN'T DONE WHAT HE DID. I NEVER DID THAT TO HIM. Because of what he did, I totally do not trust men at their word. He said that being with him uplifted his self-esteem. I felt like I was robbed. And I am so happy that I do not ever see him out. He truly disappointed me. He was a total let down.

EDIT: Oh and BTW, my opening paragraph on my first post, about prejudice towards bi men, was certainly not directed at you, invisi.

I know. I was probably explaining it how I processed your statement in context of writing what I had to write. I sometimes wish I were bisexual. This would be where I would be dating women if I were. Unfortunately, that isn't the case. I don't have anyone. No man.
I am truly at a crossroad. And I don't want anymore of what I have gotten.

 

[invisibleman]

My husband has already admitted to a couple of homosexual episodes where he was an interested bystander, more or less. Seems a lot more men are drawn to his size than women, but now it's mine, and I'm not a good sharer.

Yes, I would be surprised, horrified, cheated and would kick his ass from here to Timbuktu.

The reality is that I have a lot more gay male friends than he does (I'm an interior designer - it's in the job description) and yes, some do love my breasts. But they have no idea what Cap has in his pants and I aim to keep it that way.

Here's how I feel about it--MY OPINION AND FEELINGS. If I see a hot straight guy, I don't want him. I respect his sexuality. I don't bother him. I don't tell him that I am going to bed him.

If I truly felt like most of the gay peeps feel on here about bedding straight men...I surely could have done that in high school...in college...but I never had that urge or felt that as TROPHY WORTHY...fucking a straight guy.

I even worked out in a public gym. There were plenty of straight men. One was a personal trainer. He was really attractive. One day, he came in wearing some sweatpants...he showed a visible penis line in the crotch--he was flaccidly hung thick. I smiled :mischievous: but I didn't touch him. I went home and jerked off. I made sure that I worked out when he wasn't around...so that I could work out and not be distracted. Hehehe. :smile: But I definately do not have the "bed the straight guy" urge.

 

[dalynxx]

I would be pissed that he is a cheated on me and dump him. I like to have a choice on who I choose as a partner and I would prefer someone what is truthful to me. If he was bi-sexual he should have told me before we hooked up. It's just like lying or betraying me.

 

[dalynxx]

Here's how I feel about it--MY OPINION AND FEELINGS. If I see a hot straight guy, I don't want him. I respect his sexuality. I don't bother him. I don't tell him that I am going to bed him.

If I truly felt like most of the gay peeps feel on here about bedding straight men...I surely could have done that in high school...in college...but I never had that urge or felt that as TROPHY WORTHY...fucking a straight guy.

I even worked out in a public gym. There were plenty of straight men. One was a personal trainer. He was really attractive. One day, he came in wearing some sweatpants...he showed a visible penis line in the crotch--he was flaccidly hung thick. I smiled :mischievous: but I didn't touch him. I went home and jerked off. I made sure that I worked out when he wasn't around...so that I could work out and not be distracted. Hehehe. :smile: But I definately do not have the "bed the straight guy" urge.

You have my respect. You are a stand-up guy.

 

[D_Fiona_Farvel]

But they have no idea what Cap has in his pants and I aim to keep it that way.

You know, I discuss the size or skill of my partners with close friends. But, I can totally understand why you would not, it just removes one element of temptation.

About the ex. If you only knew all that I have experienced with that guy...I think that the logical progression would've been a foot in his ass, too. But I am happy that I am not around him. I TOTALLY WISHED THAT HE HADN'T DONE WHAT HE DID. I NEVER DID THAT TO HIM. Because of what he did, I totally do not trust men at their word. He said that being with him uplifted his self-esteem. I felt like I was robbed. And I am so happy that I do not ever see him out. He truly disappointed me. He was a total let down.

EDIT: Oh and BTW, my opening paragraph on my first post, about prejudice towards bi men, was certainly not directed at you, invisi.

I know. I was probably explaining it how I processed your statement in context of writing what I had to write. I sometimes wish I were bisexual. This would be where I would be dating women if I were. Unfortunately, that isn't the case. I don't have anyone. No man.
I am truly at a crossroad. And I don't want anymore of what I have gotten.

My fingers are crossed that a good man finds you, Invisi. :hug: I know sometimes it may seem impossible or easier to give up hope, but please do not allow one man's mind games to rob you of the ability to believe something good may happen.

If you were into women, I would be first in line for the music (I love your music!), sidewinder and Mars Rocks. But, since you're not, I am totally into sharing my BF... OK, he does not know this yet, but we can work on him. :09: *hugs*

 

[Not_Punny]

Hello, Roofies, you sploolicious thing you. Luved the pun! (Dear in the headlights)