Deep Thoughts For Those Who Take Things Way Too Serious

Discussion in 'Funny Stuff: Jokes, Quizzes, Games & Pics' started by jakeatolla, Jul 13, 2010.

  1. jakeatolla

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    - A day without sunshine is like...night.

    - He who laughs last thinks slowest.

    - On the other hand, you have different fingers

    - I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

    - The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap.

    - 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.

    - 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

    - Remember, half the people you know are below average.

    - Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

    - A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

    - If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.

    - OK, . . . . so what's the speed of dark?

    - Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

    - Every one has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.

    - How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?

    - What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

    - Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

    - Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened.

    - Just remember - if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off.

    - Light travels faster than sound. That is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

    - Life isn't like a box of chocolates; it's more like a jar of jalapeno's. What you do today, might burn your butt tomorrow.

    - How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.
     
  2. crescendo69

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    - I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

    I knew I could somehow save money on my next brake job.
     
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