Depressed... Wondering why no one loves me.

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by NightOwlGate, Jan 29, 2012.

  1. NightOwlGate

    NightOwlGate New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 14, 2010
    Messages:
    165
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    4
    Gender:
    Male
    I read so many posts on here of gay guys with straight friends who care about them and vice versa and people with lots of friends, but I have almost no friends and I feel so lonely...
     
  2. 11ish

    11ish Member

    Joined:
    Jan 28, 2012
    Messages:
    369
    Albums:
    7
    Likes Received:
    28
    Gender:
    Male
    ive moved a lot in life, and learned people and new friends are networking, make one and hang out with them during group functions, then you meet others.
     
  3. XanaJew

    XanaJew New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2008
    Messages:
    144
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Laguna Niguel
    I'll be your friend, man.
     
  4. D_Sal_Manilla

    D_Sal_Manilla Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2012
    Messages:
    1,054
    Likes Received:
    3
    Dude i would love to get to know you. Your hot, I'm hot (well i think i am) so fair warning that I'm sending you a friend request, even if its just to chat. :)
     
  5. dolfette

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 13, 2006
    Messages:
    11,901
    Likes Received:
    25
    you've just got to find your tribe.
    some people are fortunate to find them right on their doorstep. others need to do a bit of searching until they find them.
    it's not a fault or a failing with who you are, because you're as worth loving as the next man, it's about meeting those people with whom you feel that spark of connection.

    it'll happen.
    don't lose heart.
     
  6. Q Vee

    Q Vee New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2006
    Messages:
    1,032
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    8
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    New England, USA
    Life can be difficult and seem lonely at times. If you are really suffering from depression that SO does not help. If you have a health plan please try counseling, and speaking from experience, the first one may not click you may have to go through a few. That is common and not anyone's fault.

    In the meantime, you seem like a nice guy and you look cool enough to me. Plus 71 people have become your friend on here. That is pretty good!!! I bet there are other positives you have and I encourage you write them down and put those first on your mind; over any negatives you feel you have.

    Your young and you have a lot to live and experience. Don't wait for, visit museums, go to concerts and movies, try the new restaurant in town. If you see a friendly face along the way strike up a conversation. Just a few words and if there is a good vibe, go with it. If not keep it movin'.

    Enjoy some of life's pleasures, there are so many people that would trade places with you in a second.
     
  7. avg_joe

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Aug 15, 2006
    Messages:
    3,284
    Likes Received:
    5
    Gender:
    Male
    I learned from the hard way that if you didn't have many friends, life could be a constant struggle. Now I try to make friends with as many people as I can.
     
  8. B_thickjohnny

    B_thickjohnny New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 2, 2007
    Messages:
    2,874
    Likes Received:
    42
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Atlanta GA
    I know EXACTLY where you're coming from. I've moved around a bit though I was in Prague for 17 years. I never developed a real friendship with any one person - except maybe my ex with whom I'm still close. Other people I knew were more acquaintances, not friends - not people I could call on in times of trouble. My best friends are the guys I grew up with in New Orleans. Even those I haven't seen in years are still good friends and when I'm in town we always get together.

    Now I'm in Atlanta and have reconnected with former co-workers but that's not gone any further than dinner or a beer or a coffee. They have not asked me to join them at a Christmas party or dinner with other friends. Sometimes I feel better just staying home, working or watching the TV.

    I've been told to join a professional networking group but that's work related. I plan on joining a gay nudist group because I think that connection might be a good way of making friends. Otherwise, I'm not sure how, at 56, to make new friends.
     
  9. rbkwp

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2007
    Messages:
    29,252
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    1,915
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Auckland (AUK, NZ)
    Feel free to PM, at any time, always replied to ASAP
    Cheers
     
  10. tallguypns

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Aug 9, 2005
    Messages:
    1,663
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    6
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    nw florida
    Loneliness is humanity. We are all lonely. One can have hundreds of friends and be lonely. One can have no friends and be lonely. One can be surrounded by love and still be lonely. I suffer from depression and know that loneliness of which you speak. But as I've aged, I've found I prefer the company of myself to the company of others. It takes only a few hours among people to realize that I am not comfortable with people. I spend many lonely nights at home. In fact, if I'm not working, I'm usually alone. Now, how does this apply to your situation? You can choose to work on your depression with the help of a therapist, or become like me. Neither is the wrong path. It is all in how you see yourself.
     
  11. tanstaafl16

    tanstaafl16 Member

    Joined:
    May 23, 2011
    Messages:
    144
    Likes Received:
    17
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    New York City
    I'd be happy to talk to you ....
     
  12. Rugbypup

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jul 25, 2007
    Messages:
    3,194
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    19
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    New Zealand
    Kinda understand.

    I'm not happy with the company of gay men and straight men seem hesitant with mine. Leaving me with friends few and far between.

    You learn to live with it.

    I have dark days and fortuantly the are usually short lived.

    Friends, real friends in life are few and far between, keep looking though, they do pop up every now and again. :)
     
  13. wavejock

    wavejock Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 11, 2012
    Messages:
    526
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    248
    Gender:
    Male
    I am going to play devils advocate here bro and ask you to look at yourself objectively. I dont know you from a hole in the wall, but I have found that if a person doesnt have a ton of friends or whatever...usually its something about them.. a vibe, something they are projecting, etc etc. Just be objective man...your probably a good guy but maybe you are projecting something. Try it dude....and also there is no shame in talking to a therapist about that..they can really be helpful in helping people understand themselves better and also how others see us. I guarantee that how we see ourselves is not how others always see us...
     
  14. B_ILIW

    B_ILIW New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 25, 2009
    Messages:
    1,448
    Likes Received:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Birmingham, UK
    I don't believe life is difficult. I think, OP, you just need social skills.
     
  15. rbkwp

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2007
    Messages:
    29,252
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    1,915
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Auckland (AUK, NZ)
  16. SR_HollowAngel

    SR_HollowAngel New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2011
    Messages:
    19
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Florida
    I have been where you have more times than I would like, and I have not even hit my 30's.


    It does get lonely from time to time, and good friends are really tough to find. right now I just hang around with people that I know a bit. Not really the type to go out and hang out anywhere, or someone you can ask for a favor. Plus being gay makes the possibility of them finding out a little intimidating.


    The only thing I can say is that things get better in time. You are fortunate to have this many people online who are willing to chat and add you as a friend (wish I did), including myself.


    Life is not always as bad as it seems. All you can do is endure the rough spots and rise to see the sun.
     
  17. Redwyvre

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 22, 2011
    Messages:
    560
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    414
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    midwest
    It's amazing you've admitted you feel depressed and lonely. Now you need to do the work to find the key to open your heart. Good luck!
     
  18. Yorkie

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 5, 2006
    Messages:
    3,024
    Albums:
    3
    Likes Received:
    102
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Yorkshire, UK
    If he stops calling abortion "murder" and normal healthy penises "ant-eater cocks" it will be a good start.
     
  19. reallyhot

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 25, 2006
    Messages:
    1,479
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    79
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    The Great White North
    So what part of the world are you in?
    Perhaps you're located near someone who might like to be your friend!
    Put it out there and see what happens, nothing ventured, nothing gained.
    Like one of the posters said " you've just got to find your tribe"...
    Perhaps it's been someone here all along.
    Good Luck!
     
  20. Pierced1953

    Pierced1953 New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 16, 2010
    Messages:
    662
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    43
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    naked Tn
    Chill man. friends can start here. i have many gay friends, makes no difference what their sexual pref is. give us a hello back.
     
Draft saved Draft deleted