Did you "choose" to be gay?

[Titanomachina]

You are being ignorant, and you are making assumptions about something you don't know about. Just because you don't like going to Pride, it doesn't make it or the people who attend it stupid. You seem very keen to separate yourself from a type of gay person. Everyone is different, there's no need to pigeonhole people.

No I'm being realistic. Despite wanting to be part of the norm ( at least that's the public message), it's clear they don't want to be like everyone else. Different for the sake of being different, AKA stupid.

When you study psychology long enough this stuff becomes clear. You wouldn't understand because you are caught up in it.

 

[nickinoo]

No I'm being realistic. Despite wanting to be part of the norm ( at least that's the public message), it's clear they don't want to be like everyone else. Different for the sake of being different, AKA stupid.

When you study psychology long enough this stuff becomes clear. You wouldn't understand because you are caught up in it.

You are speaking on behalf of a lot of people who you don't know and making assumptions about them. That's not being realistic.

 

[Titanomachina]

You are speaking on behalf of a lot of people who you don't know and making assumptions about them. That's not being realistic.

Actually it is. I don't have to know each person personally, as that would cloud the data.

 

[nickinoo]

Actually it is. I don't have to know each person personally, as that would cloud the data.

What data are you talking about?

 

[Titanomachina]

What data are you talking about?

In regards to human behavior and motivation. Personal connections create bias and make people into more than what they are:

 

[nickinoo]

In regards to human behavior and motivation. Personal connections create bias and make people into more than what they are:

Could you expand on that. It's quite vague.

 

[umdoistressilvaquatro]

They make a certain subset of the gay population feel that way. Pride is just an excuse to throw a party and to feel special for no reason. There isn't anything unique about being gay any more than straight. It's just being human. They say they want to feel normal in society but that is obviously not the case.

Or to put it more simply, Pride is a stupid event for stupid people.

The Pride Parade is actually a continuation of Christopher Street Liberation Day. In the 60s, gay people lived under a police-state, living under the danger of persecution even when we were already living underground lives. One day we fought back. Every year in NY city gay people had a parade in the Greenwich Village in celebration of the resistance that occured in Stonewall Inn (located in Christopher Street). Once the celebrations grown bigger and moved outside of Christopher Street (and of NYC), it became known as Pride Parade. So it's not a stupid event for stupid people.

 

[Smaccoms]

Or to put it more simply, Pride is a stupid event for stupid people.

It's so very strange to see a person so ignorant of systemic oppression. Are you even aware of class society itself? I imagine not, being so ignorant of the realities of such a social system.

That's doesn't sound like how it happens in anywhere in the World

Really? Many, many men I've met have been afraid of losing their heterosexual status, especially within the grips of wanting to experiment with homosexual relations. Why would that same pressure not exist from the opposite end of the spectrum?

 

[umdoistressilvaquatro]

Really? Many, many men I've met have been afraid of losing their heterosexual status, especially within the grips of wanting to experiment with homosexual relations. Why would that same pressure not exist from the opposite end of the spectrum?

Because only one end of the spectrum is object of social scorn, only one internalizes they should be different, only one is under threath of rejection from family and friends. Basicaly: because homophobia exists, and heterophobia does not.

 

[HereIcome4917]

I'm 18 and gay, just came out and I this question has irked me since middle school. Did any of you actually choose to be gay? I'm not asking about whether or not you chose to come out or express youself as gay, I'm asking about whether or not you chose to be attracted to other men. It would boggle me if anyone would. I'm all for pride, but who would want to be a part of a minority struggling to fit in?

I did not choose to be gay. Absolutely not. It's a real nightmare when your in high school middle school. Judgment and confusion. Who would choose that kind of life? But I wouldn't change it for the world. I think guys are the best things ever built. I'm pretty sure straight men don't choose to be straight... Okay well some of them might LMAO

 

[Smaccoms]

Because only one end of the spectrum is object of social scorn, only one internalizes they should be different, only one is under threath of rejection from family and friends. Basicaly: because homophobia exists, and heterophobia does not.

Of course heterophobia exists, it's simply not institutionalized like homophobia is. Besides, class society exists in a binary. This means much policing goes into maintaining binaries, even ones within sexual orientation and race. It's simply another way of reinforcing and pushing the status quo, the status quo being Capitalism. In short, it's reactionary. Queer people experience just as much social pressure to stay "as gay as possible" (whatever the hell that actually means) as straight people experience to stay "as straight as possible" (whatever the hell THAT means).

So a gay person that feels more bisexual or pansexual could, potentially, feel "trapped" inside their gayness. Even if they don't see anything wrong with being completely gay, they might not like only having access to men or women. I certainly didn't. I wanted to know what straight men and gay women were getting so hot and heavy over.

Now I do, and it's wonderful.

 

[dongalong]

We all have thoughts and ideas, some of which are good, bad or don't conform to societal norms.
If we choose, those thoughts can disappear from our minds forever and nothing actually happens.

What if there is an idea that stays in our minds and is repeated constantly? That is a belief.

What if that belief brings you pleasure and excitement? It can stay stuck in your mind or it can manifest into life experiences if you choose to allow it.

My point is, there is always a choice somewhere down the line, whatever we do.

 

[umdoistressilvaquatro]

Of course heterophobia exists, it's simply not institutionalized like homophobia is. Besides, class society exists in a binary. This means much policing goes into maintaining binaries, even ones within sexual orientation and race. It's simply another way of reinforcing and pushing the status quo, the status quo being Capitalism. In short, it's reactionary. Queer people experience just as much social pressure to stay "as gay as possible" (whatever the hell that actually means) as straight people experience to stay "as straight as possible" (whatever the hell THAT means).

So a gay person that feels more bisexual or pansexual could, potentially, feel "trapped" inside their gayness. Even if they don't see anything wrong with being completely gay, they might not like only having access to men or women. I certainly didn't. I wanted to know what straight men and gay women were getting so hot and heavy over.

Now I do, and it's wonderful.

If you actually know an example of a straight person's heterosexuality being object of social scorn, do tell me. Same thing for a case of a straight person internalizing they should be gay, and a straight person living under threath of rejection from family and friends for being straight.
Also, your understanding that oppression systems exist only to perpetuate binaries is simply baloney. Oppression exists to perpetuate supremacism.

 

[umdoistressilvaquatro]

We all have thoughts and ideas, some of which are good, bad or don't conform to societal norms.
If we choose, those thoughts can disappear from our minds forever and nothing actually happens.

What if there is an idea that stays in our minds and is repeated constantly? That is a belief.

What if that belief brings you pleasure and excitement? It can stay stuck in your mind or it can manifest into life experiences if you choose to allow it.

My point is, there is always a choice somewhere down the line, whatever we do.

Yeah, but sexual orientation is not a belief, it's a physiological fact.

 

[linniejr]

The question in the conversation is Did you choose to be gay? My answer to that is, I am living as who I was born to be. I don't think it's a choice, I think you are who you are.

 

[Titanomachina]

It's so very strange to see a person so ignorant of systemic oppression. Are you even aware of class society itself? I imagine not, being so ignorant of the realities of such a social system.



Really? Many, many men I've met have been afraid of losing their heterosexual status, especially within the grips of wanting to experiment with homosexual relations. Why would that same pressure not exist from the opposite end of the spectrum?

I know about it, it's called not giving a shit.

Gay people make up such a small number of the total human population it's hard to care about them.

 

[dongalong]

Yeah, but sexual orientation is not a belief, it's a physiological fact.

Yes but surely you would choose to do what's physiologically right/healthy for yourself rather than live in denial.

 

[umdoistressilvaquatro]

Yes but surely you would choose to do what's physiologically right/healthy for yourself rather than live in denial.

If you are attracted to the same sex and choose to have sex with the opposite sex, you are still gay even though "in denial". That is, sexual orientation is still not a choice.

 

[nickinoo]

I know about it, it's called not giving a shit.

Gay people make up such a small number of the total human population it's hard to care about them.

You don't care about yourself?

 

[BIGBULL29]

Of course heterophobia exists, it's simply not institutionalized like homophobia is. Besides, class society exists in a binary. This means much policing goes into maintaining binaries, even ones within sexual orientation and race. It's simply another way of reinforcing and pushing the status quo, the status quo being Capitalism. In short, it's reactionary. Queer people experience just as much social pressure to stay "as gay as possible" (whatever the hell that actually means) as straight people experience to stay "as straight as possible" (whatever the hell THAT means).

So a gay person that feels more bisexual or pansexual could, potentially, feel "trapped" inside their gayness. Even if they don't see anything wrong with being completely gay, they might not like only having access to men or women. I certainly didn't. I wanted to know what straight men and gay women were getting so hot and heavy over.

Now I do, and it's wonderful.

You're so bright and beautiful. If everyone thought more like you..