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Discussion in 'Et Cetera, Et Cetera' started by earllogjam, May 21, 2008.
What made your childhood a happy one or unhappy one?
Unhappy- abusive older brother
Happy- my own awesomeness
I wouldn't say it sways too heavily one way or the other. The family was stable (no major drama or abuse) but heavily critical and negative. This still holds true today and has transcended to me. I am a pretty critical person by nature and don't enjoy it....Also, I was left alone too much.
If I had to choose either/or it would be unhappy...
Nice thread, btw.
I say yes, it was quite idyllic. However my shrink thinks I didn't have a good childhood. :tongue:
I had 2 parents who were always there for me and took care of all my wants and needs. We lived in a modest home in a nice neighborhood. I had lots of friends. I was occasionally spanked when bad; but not beaten or abused in any way.
I don't consider my childhood all that tragic because it didn't seem so at the time. Looking back I'm amazed I survived as well as I did.
When I got to know the inner family workings of my friends as I grew older, I came to understand that quite a few had worse homes than mine, but many also had better. Perhaps the most glaring example came from 3 brothers and their parents we spend summer vacation with. Despite one of the kids growing to be a slash-and-gore film director, I just marveled at how well they truly got along with their parents. They are the most unaffected guys I know and they didn't understand how my parents could be the way they are. We were all in mutual astonishment of the family lives of the other family.
Mostly happy. wonderful parents, friends and experiences.
but there were low points. being teased as the fat kid brought up a huge amount of problems.
I had a happy childhood.
My parents were always very positive and supportive. We lived in a quiet road, in a neighbourhood of families and retired people, where we we could play outside most of the tiime it wasn't raining. I had no hassles in school. I did occassionally notice that we didn't have the 'best' things or the newest things and I was sometimes uncomfortable about my appearance - but I had two parents at home telling me I was wonderful, beautiful and clever - I chose to believe my own press :biggrin:
The best - filled with great and happy memories!!!
My childhood was generally okay, quite good in fact. Although it wasn't privileged or "rich" or anything.
The problems arose in my teenage years. It was quite a shock to be told that my (dead) 'father' was in fact not my father. It was then a shock to find out who was. Then there were the questions such as 'if he (the deceased) is not my father - then why do I have his first and last names? Why was I lied to? etc.
Without ranting on and on: my childhood was generally quite awesome and I have great memories of it, quite a good memory in general. My teenage years - especially from 15-18 - were pretty shit.
WOW! I don't know what to write and certainly not how to vote.
Generally, and from the outside, it was a pretty perfect family set up.
Certainly no physical abuse or shit like that.
However, I have just gone out and bought the book 'They Fuck you up' by Oliver James!!! :tongue:
My mother is pretty sadisitic and very judgemental. She learnt early on that the best way of 'handling' me and making me do what she thought was right was by the threat of me being 'disowned' by the family.
She was actually pretty astute! 'Spot on' infact!
It completely screwed me up for years... 42 of them, to be honest.
But that was my fault. I was stupid enough to believe her, unquestioningly.
SO I've believed all this time that sex is wrong, dirty and should not be partaken of, especially out of wedlock.
That I should be ashamed of my body
That I have horrible boobs (her mother-in-laws, don't you know) and that I should never ever ever have a tattoo.
oh and smoke
and be loud or vivacious
or have an opinion.....
and she and my Dad rowed a lot, which I used to get in the middle of cos I hated seeing her screaming at my Dad and preferred her to scream at me.
But they are still together and bonking twice a week!
I completely take full responsibility for the negative effect she's had on my life cos I let her.
But shall no more! :biggrin1:
I'm still a work in progress! :redface:
I'm not sure if unhappy would be the correct choice of words for my childhood. I was the youngest of ten children. I never felt like I belonged there, no real connection to my family. When I turned 18 I moved away, at 42 I am finally getting comfortable going to the home of my youth.
Yeah, I had a generally happy childhood - a few minor whippin's here and there, but that was pretty much the norm back in the day!! I'm still on great terms with my parents - talk to them once a week on the phone, although I only see them a few times a year.
The presence of a large immediate family and both parents, however bitchy they are, made my childhood OK. Not unrealistically, zippy do dah happy, but stable and decent. They are good people.
It wasn't terrible, it wasn't great. I had an average or slightly below average childhood. I was teased and bullied a lot but I also had many friends.
It was the best...Great mother...stepfather got better with time. We lived in a great house overlooking the Pacific ocean.We had alot of parties and Sunday Brunches and BBQ's Went to a great school. We had really nice vacations. My brother and I had a great childhood. My step brother claims to have had a horrible one. Same family, same house, same experiences, he is five years younger...go figure
"Did you have a happy childhood?" Fuck no. Stable household, caring parents, and all that good stuff, but I was the youngest and lived under the tyranny of my immediately older brother who never missed an opportunity to humiliate me. I wet the bed for years, a classic symptom of emotional disturbance (as I only learned in adulthood) as well as an additional humiliation.
I have never wanted to have children because I could not bear the possibility that they might be something like me.
I had shelter, food, clothes, some affection, and some friends, mixed in with some abuse. It wasn't great but it was much better than a lot of kids I knew. Did it scar me for life. No
I would describe my childhood as "hard knock." My dad was the worse the kind of husband to my mother, and completely neglected my brother and I, but my mom was a soldier. She can take a direct hit and keep tickin'. We laughed a lot and that made the worse days...okay. I always had a lot of friends, was rewarded when I excelled in something, slept peacefully when I knew my dad wasn't coming home and I could tell that my mom was at peace.
Childhood was cool. How about that other than happy or unhappy? It's too difficult of a time to just place in the happy or unhappy box, for me at least. I wouldn't do it again if that says anything.
Yes I had a good childhood. We didn't have a lot of money but we always had food and clothing and a home. I had neighbor kids that I was friends with. In the summer on the weekends we would go to the lake and have an all day BBQ. The only regret is that when we drove to Florida with my grandparents we wanted to go to Disney and my grandparents were against it. My parents are very different types of grandparents and never would say no to my niece or nephew.
After I graduated High school me and my older sister went to Disney for vacation and it was great. By coincidence we picked the perfect time in early September when the kids were all back in school.
Childhood was pretty good. I have six brothers and sisters and I was second from the last. We had the usual sibling dramas, but we generally had a lot of fun. Our parents were firm, but kind and funny as hell. We always ate together at a big table and manners were strictly enforced. I was the family comic and got away with a lot of shit that the older kids never would have. I think parents mellow as the number of kids increase.