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Yeah after reading more of the reddit page it became very apparent that they are nothing like incels. The vibe is more “I just want to be loved”. It makes me sad that they have the labels, and women identify as such, regarding their perceived attractiveness (or lack thereof).I don't think FEMCELs canonize spree killers or encourage rape, misogyny or hatred of menfolk.. so, no problems with 'em.
It does suck that they coopted INCEL vocab. I like that they openly distance themselves from the hate and blame associated with INCELs in their mission statement.
Amen!I’ve heard of them. I also don’t like the use of incel language. It bothers me when people think they’re unlovable, regardless of the reason. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. You need to love yourself before others can love you.
And you can’t really love without loving yourself. To quote the great RuPaul, “if you can’t love yourself, how the hell you gonna love somebody else?”. Can I get an amen up in here?
Good looking women don’t have everything handed to them on a silver platter. I won’t say I was super good-looking when I was young (I was attractive), so I won’t use myself as an example, but I hung out with some gorgeous friends. Super popular. Anyway, on the surface it might have looked like life was easy, but their boyfriends cheated on them, their hearts got broken, they still had to study for university, they got sexually assaulted, they got into financial trouble - I mean, sure being pretty gets you into clubs, gets you backstage at concerts, gets you attention, but it doesn’t protect you from life.Amen!
And I kind of get the “woe is me” vibe too, which isn’t going to do them any favours. Confidence and positivity is also key. I get that having a community to relate to is important and can be helpful, but like you said, it just kind of seems like a self-fulfilling prophecy
And it also kind of bothers me that their beliefs are that the “Stacy’s” of the world have everything easy and everything handed to them on a golden platter just because they are good looking.
I don’t have a problem with femcels, but I just don’t think they are doing themselves any favours and it does concern me as being part of the sisterhood.
100%. I’m no Stacy, but I’d also like to think that I don’t meet the femcel definition (4/10 in attractiveness). I too have had, and still do have, friends who I think are more attractive than me who have been to hell and back. And I’ve also been there, as I believe most women have regardless of their looks.Good looking women don’t have everything handed to them on a silver platter. I won’t say I was super good-looking when I was young (I was attractive), so I won’t use myself as an example, but I hung out with some gorgeous friends. Super popular. Anyway, on the surface it might have looked like life was easy, but their boyfriends cheated on them, their hearts got broken, they still had to study for university, they got sexually assaulted, they got into financial trouble - I mean, sure being pretty gets you into clubs, gets you backstage at concerts, gets you attention, but it doesn’t protect you from life.
If all you want are the perks of being “pretty”, that’s fine I guess. It’s fun, no doubt. But it doesn’t get you love, it doesn’t guarantee you a good life, or a faithful boyfriend/husband, or healthy family. And pretty changes. It doesn’t always last. A woman better have something else going on for herself or she’s going to be left pretty devastated later on.
Exactly!100%. I’m no Stacy, but I’d also like to think that I don’t meet the femcel definition (4/10 in attractiveness). I too have had, and still do have, friends who I think are more attractive than me who have been to hell and back. And I’ve also been there, as I believe most women have regardless of their looks.
I’m still trying to gain further understanding of this, but basically the goal of femcels appears to be “ascension”. Based on what I’ve read, ascending is generally a transformation to be “pretty”, getting into a loving long term relationship and not being discriminated against (eg jobs) for their looks. Why isn’t it about being comfortable in your own skin, loving yourself, knowing your worth and gaining confidence?! Everything will flow from there.