dilemma about my sex pictures...

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by the_reverend, Jan 7, 2008.

  1. the_reverend

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    so after coming back to the site, i decided to...expand my gallery with a few choice pics of my ex and i in one of our favored activities. I'd gone back and forth on the matter for a while before my sabbatical, and now i'm facing the dilemma...

    see, the pictures were taken for just the two of us when we were still together. i justify it by saying that since i've done my best to maintain my anonymity on this site that her anonymity is protected as well. no one i know posts here and, near as i can tell, no one she knows posts here. we've been broken up for about as long as we'd been dating at this point...but at the same time, i still love her and i want to make sure i do right by her.

    so i seek the advice, counsel and wisdom of the lovely ladies here as my ethical and exhibitionist sides appear to be stalemated in the struggle of what to do...what do you think is the "right" thing to do here? cuz i'm slightly stumped and just want to make sure i'm properly balancing the fun I personally have here with a certain modicum of responsibility and consideration towards others. thanks in advance for any clarification or potential epiphanies you might be able to provide. :cool:
     
  2. SpeedoMike

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    IMHO, you would be a low down cad to share them with anybody. what would you say if she had some pics of you and passed them around to her friends? :eek:
     
  3. the_reverend

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    well, she DOES have the same pics...but, again, there is the fact that while i'm on friendly terms with some people around here, it's not like i'm passing them around and showing them to my friends who know me, let alone her. no one here knows either of us. it may not be a huge difference...or even a big enough difference...but that's where the dilemma of it comes in for me.

    (and considering what she's apparently already told quite a few of her closest friends, showing pictures would just be visual confirmation...lol)
     
  4. ManlyBanisters

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    There's your answer buddy - you said it yourself.
     
  5. D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah

    D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah Account Disabled

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    If you haven't got her permission then don't post them. The pictures were taken in private and to show them without her consent would be very disrespectful, even if she is non recognizable.
     
  6. Mandee

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    Hmmm... Idk... I think maybe if you block out her face so that no one can see who she is, there's really not much harm being done, but idk....
     
  7. Catchoftheday

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    Im sorry I dont see how this is a womans issue, so...I dont know how you think posting intimate pictures of somebody who you claim to love on a public website is a good idea, sorry but I dont have the words in my vocabulary to describe HOW bad an idea it is. Even thinking about it is totally deplorable PLEASE do not.
     
  8. the_reverend

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    well, it's not a women's issue...but i wanted to get a female point of view on it. i have a highly exhibitionist side, so there is a part of me that wants to show them off...and i had the rationale in my mind that doing so from behind the veil of anonymity that i've used in posting my own solo pictures made it okay.

    of course, ethics have to win the day and no amount of intellectual justification can make something right if it doesn't feel right. so thanks to those of you who helped give the voice of my conscience a little more strength. i've taken the pictures down.

    and thanks in particular to those who managed to do so without being immediately judgemental and confrontational. :p
     
  9. ManlyBanisters

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    Good call, rev. And, btw, nice cock :wink:
     
  10. SpoiledPrincess

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    Don't post them, you don't feel right about it and your feelings are right. They were for you to share with her and even though you protected her anonymity she'd know they were her.
     
  11. B_Italian1

    B_Italian1 New Member

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    What's with you people that post these long farewells and then come back a few weeks later? Anyway, welcome back Rev!
    You are questioning it, and usually when you question something it's because you have your doubts about it. If you really felt okay about it, you would just do it. I could be wrong, but I think maybe deep down inside you don't feel okay with it.
     
  12. the_reverend

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    awww...well thank you very much. :biggrin1: at least i got that out of this whole thing. lol!

    thanks for the welcome back! and hey, i was gone for almost a month...give me some credit. :wink:

    i think you're absolutely right on the questioning it part. i just needed some extra voices to lend that part of myself credence over the more exhibitionist "id" side of my brain that just thinks the pics of me and her together are really hot and wanted to show them off. lol. to be entirely fair, it wasn't entirely libido driven. there's also a kind of...sentimental side to it. like sexual nostalgia, i guess. i miss being with her on so many levels, but this is one of the few levels that has documented proof...and i think some part of me was tired or frustrated or something with remembering it in a vacuum, and felt like maybe sharing it with others would make it "realer." and i know she still thinks about us and our time together, that she still loves me and thinks i'm much better in bed than her current beau, lol. but we can't really TALK about those things, or much else, since she's with this guy now.

    meh...maybe i'm just feeling heartbroken and lovelorn and needed some excuse to vent about it for a bit with strangers since my friends are all bored of hearing it by now. lol. thanks again for the help, y'all!
     
  13. TheRob

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    dude if your even mildly uncomfortable with havingher pictures up take them down
    if youll forgive the phrasing, nobody on this site has a 'God given right' to see your ex naked...
     
  14. B_DEATHbyCARROT

    B_DEATHbyCARROT New Member

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    I asked the same question of myself. I even put one explicit pic up for a day. But I decided that if her body is shown even if she is not recognizable it is kinda wrong to do it without her permission (even if she will never know you did it). It's even more wrong if her face is shown (I never considered showing any of those).

    The only one I felt comfortable posting in the end was the one I didn't think she would mind herself being in (the one with her holding it).

    Bottom line: If you don't know that she would definitely be ok with it you are wrong to post it. If there is any doubt there is no doubt.
     
  15. B_Hickboy

    B_Hickboy New Member

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    You were gone?
     
  16. B_ajaxgayguy7

    B_ajaxgayguy7 New Member

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    her loss, nice cock buddy.
     
  17. the_reverend

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    just to reiterate...i've gone ahead and taken them down. in case anyone missed that a few posts back.

    lol...yeah. glad to know i was missed. :wink:

    well, thank you very much. she occasionally thinks so too, apparently. lol
     
  18. Not_Punny

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    Then why don't you tell her to get rid of the new beau?!
     
  19. the_reverend

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    because she lives on the other side of the country so it's not like we can be together even if she does. though they did break up for about a month this summer, and during that time we thought about maybe trying to possibly rekindle something, but the logistics proved too difficult and she wound up taking him back a little while later. apparently, things are better now and as long as she's happy overall...well, that's all that matters. i can't exactly ask her to dump him, uproot her life and move across the country just because our sex life was better. lol
     
  20. Hippie Hollow Girl

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    I think you made a wise decision. It isn't morally right to post nude pics of someone without their permission. Not to mention that you can probably depending on where you are at could get into legal trouble. Everyone needs to remember that when you post pics on here they are not secure....I remember reading some posts where people's pics have been stolen and put on other sites. That could be really embarrassing for people's jobs.....political careers.

    I don't think a hand in the pic is all that bad......But if there is a chance that someone will beat the shit out of you or get mad.......don't do it!

    Ask their permission. Or don't do it at all.
     
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