Discuss your Orientation

[zipper69]

I'm orientated North, but if you rotate me I'll be facing South.

 

[Supersized]

I like nice guys who are very unihibited sexually. I have an atrraction to women. You could almost put it as a need. I become very codependent around women that I'm attracted to and will change my personality to get them to like me. I hate that about myself but there it is. Guys I can be sexual with and still keep my identity and not put up with any you know what. Beautiful women can and have walked all over me. I might say I prefer men because I'm less likely to get hurt and I can be myself around them.

 

[bstexas]

My orientation is 100% gay. For as long as I can remember (even when I was 4, 5 or 6 years old) I was intrigued by men. I used to think to myself about the neighbor's dad who would play baseball with us, "I wish my dad was like _______", meaning the neighbor. When I was a little older, the kids in the neighborhood played around, showed each other our private parts ... touched them ... both guys and girls. The older I got the more infatuated with guys I got. I enjoyed being around them, was attracted to the athletic ones, didn't have much sexual experiments but KNEW I liked them. In jr. high and high school did sleep overs and jerking each other. I "dated" a few girls but didn't have real sex with them; just kissing and what not. So this feeling of wanting to be with men was ingrained in my very being before I even knew what sex or being gay or str8 was. I do enjoy watching str8 sex - it's hot to see a guy and gal together. I don't relate to the girl "wishing I was her" and I don't relate to the guy "he's getting that girl", it's just hot to me to see them having sex and being aroused and all. I'm 100% gay but still appreciate a beautiful, vivacious woman but don't wanna have sex with her. Now a guy? A muscular beefy stud? I wanna get to him as fast as I can! LOL

 

[titan1968]

What a good thread. Keep on posting.:biggrin1:

 

[titan1968]

When I was in my teens and twenties, I did feel some attraction for some jocks (I was lanky and awkward back then). Some guys did hit on me in university, but I didn't feel the need to respond to their advances (I was very inhibited back then). However, things changed when I hit my 30s: I started to have feelings for guys and needed to act on them; I still feel the same way at 40 and am not so inhibited....

I feel attraction for men and women, but couldn't tell you whether I'm more attracted to men or women. A fomer gay friend of mine was bold enough to tell me that I was gay and in denial.

When I'm in a relationship, I'd never think of cheating on that person.

 

[Fire Stick]

Convention, supported by traditional cultural and social mores, teaches us to think about heterosexuality and homosexuality in black and white terms. As I became a sexually experienced adult, I began to fully understand how this aspect of human sexuality is more realistically depicted as a continuum. Sure, there are many people who are exclusively heterosexual or homosexual, but there are also a lot of people at different points in between the two extremes, whether or not they ever act on both of sexual interests, whether or not they consider themselves to be bisexual in any practical sense. Its great that the LPSG community is sophisticated enough to understand this. On a personal note, I have always found there to be a great many men who are quite straight for the most part but who nonetheless are intrigued and even aroused by a large penis. I know that’s not a bold statement for this site.

In respect to my own sexuality, I consider myself to be gay, but even so, I have enjoyed sex with women. Honestly, though, I think a good part of the enjoyment owed to a satisfied male ego for having “nailed a broad.” I am never blind to a beautiful or sexy woman, but for a woman to register on the peter-meter, and some do, she has to be a pretty specific type that works for me. My sexual tastes in men are much broader, and a certain physical standard – although desirable – is not as critical. Because of lifestyle choices I have made, it has been a long time since I have pursued sexual relations with women. In male-to-male sex, I find the intensity of combined male sex drives to be particularly hot. Also, plainly spoken, I really like dicks and always have– my own and the dicks of other guys.

 

[D_Pubert Stabbingpain]

Interesting thread but highly subjective. My interpretation of the purpose and true meaning of the percentages is highly different from someone (perhaps everyone!) else's. As I have read posts throughout, not only this thread but, the entire lpsg site, I can honestly say that many, perhaps most, men who list themselves as 1%, 10%, or even 25% gay and then talk about their experiences, fantasies, preferences, and orientation, put my 50% to shame. As I have said in other threads dealing with this topic, I based my percentages on an overall life experience PLUS, as many here have stated, I find both men and women physically attractive. Is the % based only on appearance and attractiveness? Is it based only on the gender of the people you have sex with? Is it based on who you feel more emotionally attracted to? Is it a combo of all of these? *OR* should we just not worry about any of these and concentrate at our current place in time, with whomever we are with and not allow someone's gender dictate what we do or, better yet, who we are?
:smile:
Namaste

 

[hyphap]

My personal orientation is pretty unambiguously gay. I can recognize attractive women, and comment on them, but as I always say, it's like looking at a landscape painting: just because it's beautiful doesn't meant I want to have sex with it.

As for the straight men here who enjoy looking at pictures of dicks--the sex columnist Dan Savage, one of my favorite voices on matters of sexuality, says that straight men enjoy dick. They don't like men, but dicks are fascinating. It's the reason for the popularity of shemales: gay men don't want women with dicks, they want men. Straight men are the ones who want women and penises at the same time.

 

[D_Pubert Stabbingpain]

As for the straight men here who enjoy looking at pictures of dicks--the sex columnist Dan Savage, one of my favorite voices on matters of sexuality, says that straight men enjoy dick. They don't like men, but dicks are fascinating. It's the reason for the popularity of shemales: gay men don't want women with dicks, they want men. Straight men are the ones who want women and penises at the same time.

Interesting you interpret Savage's opinion this way. Here is a quote from an April column (scroll half way down to "I've got a file full of letters . . ":

[Savage Love] Piss, Dragons and 'Playboy'—Oh, My! - Columns - OC Weeklypage 1 - OC Weekly

Sounds to me like he thinks if a man likes cock he is gay, period. Well, I guess he doesn't really say that str8 men who suck cock actually *like* the man they are sucking. :biggrin1:



What was your point now?

 

[Corius]

Yes, 15 shooter, you have a point there. Cocks as cocks do not have power to draw me. The same can be said for vaginas! It was always the person who attracted me and the sex only came about after we were firmly bonded as friends. Though I am happily married, I can still be stirred by being in the presence of any one of my few former partners, male or female. I enjoyed sex in relationship on both sides of my sexuality and, were I free, I could very well be open to a relationship with one of my former male partners, one or the other of my two former female partners, or some new person, male or female, with whom I bonded in friendship. I have tried to be open to surprises in my life, including my sex life.

 

[Rowan Ravenseed]

Can I say firstly thank you to every-one for your feedback on this thread I'm loving reading your interpretations and how you view yourself.

That is exactly why i started this thread and why the question is phrased the way it is...... It is meant to be subjective because i feel that sexuality is a purely subjective thing..... it doesn't matter how many people tell you your gay or how many cocks you suck if you still believe yourself to be a straight man then for all intensive purposes you are a straight man. Not only that but the percentages themselves can be viewed subjectively as shooter has pointed out.

Interesting thread but highly subjective. My interpretation of the purpose and true meaning of the percentages is highly different from someone (perhaps everyone!) else's. As I have read posts throughout, not only this thread but, the entire lpsg site, I can honestly say that many, perhaps most, men who list themselves as 1%, 10%, or even 25% gay and then talk about their experiences, fantasies, preferences, and orientation, put my 50% to shame. As I have said in other threads dealing with this topic, I based my percentages on an overall life experience PLUS, as many here have stated, I find both men and women physically attractive. Is the % based only on appearance and attractiveness? Is it based only on the gender of the people you have sex with? Is it based on who you feel more emotionally attracted to? Is it a combo of all of these? *OR* should we just not worry about any of these and concentrate at our current place in time, with whomever we are with and not allow someone's gender dictate what we do or, better yet, who we are?
:smile:
Namaste

 

[dickthrobbing]

I state myself here as 80% straight and 20% gay although what I see myself as is a straight guy who enjoys fucking and being fucked, sucking and being sucked by another guy so I guess I am a bit bisexual

I was introduced to bi sex as part of a BDSM scene reluctantly at first but now

I must admit that if I look for sex with a dick out of a BDSM scene I really do enjoy the company of ladyboys / shemales as they generally have a good idea about who their are. I am not into effeminate men or butch men.

 

[biguy2738]

I am an emotional (bi-affectional) and integrated bisexual with an equal attraction to/preference for both genders. I not only appreciate the physical beauty in men and women (and fantasise about them), but I am also able to fall deeply in love with both genders and seek deep emotional bonds with men and women alike.

I do not seek a quick roll in the hay, but something far deeper and meaningful than that ie casual sex is a turn off for me.

I am married and I am out to my wife - I realised that I am bisexual after being married and felt that my wife had a right to know. I was also concerned about spending the rest of my life wondering if my wife loves me for me or is only in love with her perception of me. She has been phenomenal over the course of my 15 month journey and our marriage has deepened because of it.

I have experienced the kind of emotionally intimate bonding with men that I have longed for, I have fallen in love with men and I have had a bit of sexual contact as well...all of this to my wife's knowledge, support and acceptance...in fact, she has expressed a desire for me to meet my "Mr. Right" and to enjoy the kind of relationship with him, that I do with her in every way including sexually. When asked why, she explained that she desires for me to live from my inner truth and lead a fulfilling life without seeing a need to try to suppress any parts of myself in the process.

I am out to all of my friends which came as a shock since I am married and have never displayed any interest in men. Truth be told, I wasn't until one day I found that I had fallen for a friend of mine. Denial is a river in Egypt and all of that. My friends have been completely accepting and supportive. Some have asked a lot of questions in an attempt to better understand bisexuality as well as to get to know me better.

I am not out to my family for the simple reason that I do not have much of a relationship with them anyway...and they are incredibly homophobic. I just don't see any point in having to deal with their baggage for the sake of something that doesn't exist any way. At the same time, my Mom was very ill last year - she is old and I do not believe that I have any right to tarnish her last years with a "woe is me...and woe is my son" approach. Her homophobia is challenged by me whenever it surfaces to the point of her once telling my wife to watch out because at the rate that I'm going, one day I may just tell her (my wife) that I am gay. How we screamed with laughter after my Mom left...so much as I haven't said anything about my orientation, I am also raising enough questions for there to be the consideration that perhaps I'm not as straight as they once believed. In the long run I believe that it would be best for my Mom to make this discovery on her own - at her own time when she is ready.

I recently relocated to Cancun. I am out to my boss. I live from my inner truth freely...in the sense of openly attending gay clubs and discussing all of the "Mr McDreamys and McSteamys" that cross my path.

The most important thing to me, however is that I offered my wife divorce out of fear that my truth may bring pain and devastation to her life. She refused but she also knows that the offer still and always will stand because I would much rather protect her and have our marriage end out of mutual love and respect for each other...with the desire for each other to only enjoy the best of love and fulfilment, than out of heartache and bitterness. I'd be lying if I said that I don't feel incredibly guilty from time to time because I believe that I've given my wife a raw deal; I admit to myself and to her that there is a deepseated awareness that I am unable to give her what she deserves...because regardless of whether I have a man in my life or not, she can never have all of me...there are parts of me that can only be touched and owned by a man.

I think that I've covered the main parts of what my orientation is, how it impacts my life and my marriage and how I live out my life whilst being true to it.

 

[whatireallywant]

I put 100% straight, but I maybe should put "Unsure". I do think I'm physically 100% straight now, and as a little kid I was attracted to men but not to women. I did have a brief bi-curious stage in my teens and early twenties. I've also (especially in my teens and twenties) been more attracted to gay men than straight men.

I'm also a VERY nontraditional female, and grew up in an area that was very rigid on gender roles, so a lot of people thought I was a lesbian when I was growing up.

Then there's the physical vs. emotional attraction. I can separate sex from love, although I'd prefer to have both. Emotionally I am bisexual, since I think it's about the individual rather than the gender. I also don't believe the "biology is destiny" stuff about gendered behavior that is so prevalent these days (and probably always have been). I was really happy when I found the book Myths of Gender by Anne Fausto-Sterling because this was a biologist who had the same views on this that I have! However, physically I am 100% straight. I looooooove cocks! And I find pussies ugly (sorry women... but then, this also includes my OWN, so go figure!) I do notice when a woman is attractive though, just as I'd notice when a man is. I just don't want to have sex with the woman.

 

[Nrets]

I don't list orientation because I stubbornly refuse to come to any kind of conclusion.
My orientation has been an obsession after an extreme marijuana high put me into a permanent life loop of questioning my sexuality when I was 15.
I now know that marijuana brings out the truth and I have to acknowledge that I have an attraction to guys and a great deal of love. Botherly love, mostly.
Since I acknowledge this, my anxiety has subsided.

When it comes to romantic love, I think of women.
On the street I find myself checking out women.
infrequently I get the urge to check out guys, but I don't because I am afraid of seeming gay.

When I think about things romantically..like who I long for, who I want close by, who I want to raise a family with and ultimately die next to....I think of specific women who come through my life.

I fantasize about having intimate relationships with women. I cry over women rejecting me. I have had similar feelings over guys not hanging out with me when I was 10. They were my only friends, and I was a lonely kid.

I still to this day easily form intimate platonic relationships with men.

Ultimately if I am to be 100% honest...I feel something visceral when I am attracted to men, but there is something more spiritual when I am attracted to women.

I am probably one of those 60 40 people. Depending on the day it could be one way or the other.

In real life practice I am straight.

Someday, I may experiment with guys.

But for now...looking for petite mischevious women rockers with hourglass bodies and long eye lashes.

 

[Hockeytiger]

I'm not sure if I am answering this because the question is kind of vague. I was into girls as a teen because I think that was what society expected me to be with. Even when I had a g/f in the past, I found myself attracted if a hot guy walked by in the street or anywhere for that matter. I always found my head turning (way a str8 guy would turn for a chick). If a guy walked by with a hot ass and was nice lookin, I looked. As I got older I found myself yearning to experience a m2m which I eventually did. Suddenly it all made sense. In my own case I wasn't bi, and I wasn't str8. It felt right, like my natural inclinations (or whatever you want to call it) were finally being realized. To be honest to others around me I have never dated a girl again, and had to break up with the girl I was with at the time. I admit when I broke up with her I didn't tell her it was because I was gay. I had no problems growing up and attracting women and enjoyed sex with them, but it was more the lust type and getting off and "scoring" kinda thing. With guys it's much more intense for me because it's who I am. It's hard to describe and while I don't like labels, I don't sleep with women any longer, but can still appreciate a woman's beauty, big tits, etc. But that's all it is for me, an appreciation. The fire down below turns on when I see or meet a guy that interests me.

With Stephen's post in mind, let me give my reply. Growing up, as my sexuality blossomed, my sexual interest was entirely for girls. However, similarly to how Stephen put it, my head would turn for a hot guy, but for me is was for both men and women. At the time, however, I didn't put it together. I only had sexual fantasies about women. I didn't have any interest in have any sexual relations with a guy, even though I had an attraction to guys. Perhaps I was repressing those feelings. I just don't know. Eventually, when I hit college, I started having some sexual fantasies about guys too. I experimented with a guy and found I enjoyed it. However, my sexual fantasies for women remained and I had more fantasies and sexual thoughts about them than men, but my attraction and desire for men remained. It was a tough time sorting it all out. I heard gay and straight people saying that if a guy has any homosexual thoughts, then he is gay, and any heterosexual thoughts were merely a coping mechanism. That really messed me up for a while, and I didn't know what to think. I continued to have a majority of my sexual thought be about women, but that flew right in the face of what I was hearing about "bisexuality". Eventually, I came to my senses and realized that they were a bunch of morons and were no better than the fools who try to classify homosexuality as a mental illness. I know what is in my head better than anyone else. As a result of all that I came to terms with the fact that I do in fact have some homosexual desires but they don't negate my majority heterosexual desires. I have desires for both, and that's A-OK.

Okay, I'll admit that was a long preface for this thread's topic. But I think it is important to understand where I am coming from.

I fudge a little bit on my preferences. It should be closer to 80% or 70% straight, as that is closer to the percentages of my sexual thoughts and fantasies. However, I haven't had any sexual relations with a guy since I experimented back in college. It isn't that I'm trying to repress those feelings. Rather it is due to the fact that I met the woman I eventually married (and yes she knows all about my bisexual side). So that 80% or 70%, while perfectly accurate in regards to my feelings, are completely inaccurate about my sexual practices. Also, having it set at 80% or 70% tends to understandably encourage some of the more assertive gay and bi men to make sexual passes. While I'm not offended by them, I don't want to encourage it either. So having it set at 90% acknowledges my bisexual side (and I think it is VERY important that I never deny it, it is a part of who I am as a man) while at the same time takes into account my situation and discourages sexual advances.