Gay guys may only seem better put together or knowledge of where they are on a scale because of catty friends who tell like it is! But honestly, as a bear of a guy, I came to understand that various people find other people attractive. There is not an universal scale out there, as much as the media would have us believe.
Two things help solidify this belief/attitude for me. I lost a significant amount of weight about 5 years ago, and now there are guys that use to be interested in me, who don't notice me out at bars. I realized that while I am still not thin, there are guys who like my big bear look who would not be interested in me if I was thin.
Another was one night watching a group of cute twink guys at the baths chasing a very hot late twenties muscle guy. He was not the least bit interested in them and only went for guys shaped like me, but about 10-15 years older than me. This group of twinks were soooo funny to watch them parade and flaunt and get flustered by getting absolutely no attention from this guy. I thought again, "Different attractions for everyone."
Finally, I am a guy that finds attitude to be the key factor in attractiveness. A great fun sense of life, and willingness to have a good time, is much more important than looks.