Do Gay Men Hate Fat Guys?

[DrDick]

yeah i hope my poll went through if not, just tell me straight forward. is there any possibility a gay man would like a fat guy. because as far as i know, all gay men LOVE athletic guys with big dicks etc. as much muscle as possible, right?

anyway, i remember walking in downtown at one point and this obese individual, not just fat, but HUGE! so he walked past this gay guy, and the gay guy just went "UGH" in complete disgust, very openly, showing disgruntled look. i thought that was so rude! i sure hope not everyone reacts the same way :/

 

[StaringIsCaring]

Most of the men I have been attracted to are thicker.

People say this about gay men but it just hasn’t been true for me. In fact I would bet when I’ve been most out of shape men seem super fascinated by my ass in the gym shower.

So for me it’s been bollocks.

 

[Kevin123490]

Gays typically always go for Muscle gays but I prefer me a cub, Bear, & a man with a belly.
I’m one of those people that care about connection rather than appearances.

 

[zaynmlk1626]

no i actually find some thicker guys really cute, it's not just the body weight it's the whole package that i see.

 

[BlackIsKingSize]

This particular (mostly) gay man LOVES fat guys. And I’m not alone. There’s a whole community. Like any it has its own issues and toxicity to deal with but it can be more welcoming for guys rejected by the “mainstream.”

 

[Cum_is_Great]

There are men who like us obese men. But its a small subsection. They can be warm and very accepting. They made me feel like I am worthy of being loved.

But on average, yes gay men hate fat men. Obese men especially. Yes they make comments like what you heard, I've gotten them before. It's why I never wanted to come out. You are almost not human to gay men if not in shape. Or you are invisible. Constant reminders on dating apps of "No fats." Hell, even when apps say looking just for friends, no sex they don't talk to you. And I understand, fat isn't really an attractive feature for most. But they can be harsh.

 

[hypolimnas]

I think it depends. There are many factors ... I was at a supermarket last week. He said 'you can take your card out now' as I was paying ... I said 'sorry I was distracted by your eye colour and long lashes ... but I imagine you get that all the time' he said 'actually not really' lol. Then I think he nearly fainted as I walked out. He is a tall and heavier guy than I would usually notice and all I really want to say to him is that I'm jealous of whoever gets to fuck him while looking looking into his incredible eyes. Now I feel slutty even thinking that ...

 

[Gopher]

Gays love labeling and gays love to eat their young. Their is a stereotype of a gay man that is fit, well dressed, fashionable etc. I would say you can find a community of gays that dislike curvy or fat men. And you can also find a community that loves and celebrates them. If you are larger gay man looking for skinny or fit guys you may receive more comments on a dislike for your size than if you were looking for someone that same or similar to yourself.

Overall I would say gays don't hate fat guys, there are communities within the gay community that celebrate fat guys and communities that don't.

 

[deleted1074483]

surely this is a case of what people find attractive or not? its not about hating anyone (ok some exceptions but that applies to colour, race, etc as well).
There's also something about defining what we mean by 'fat' which seems to cover everything from 'average' to very obese/large guys depending on who's viewing.
for me personally i'm not attracted to very large built or so called fat guys for thre reasons, first that i'm quite a small chap and I've been literally squashed by a guy before now, second any larger guy I've been with has been well a bit sweaty in not a good way, third because these days I prefer a guy who looks after themselves, doesn't have to be muscular, defined or whatever, but just trying to be healthy as that's what I try to be.
But its not because I hate them at all. I appreciate that some guys are happy with themselves like this and that confidence others find attractive.

 

[1344903]

Most men hate me and I’m fat sooooo maybe??

 

[ativanplus]

This particular (mostly) gay man LOVES fat guys. And I’m not alone. There’s a whole community. Like any it has its own issues and toxicity to deal with but it can be more welcoming for guys rejected by the “mainstream.”

Can you point me in the direction of this community please? Online site? Dating app? As someone who went through a very traumatic experience at a young age 8 years ago (which turned my life upside down,) I gained quite a bit of weight and don’t feel adequate enough to even present myself to any gay men. On grindr, I’ve been called fat twice so I delete the app. My self esteem is in the dumps

 

[852838]

I’ve always been more interested in thicker guys and honestly dick size is irrelevant to me being a top. I know there is a lot of body shame that occurs and sadly the gay community isn’t as kind to each other as we should be.

 

[tito21]

Give me a guy with a great personality and kind eyes.

A fat guy with a great personality can lose weight. Mean while, an obnoxious asshole can’t shed that ugly personality no matter what! It’s who they are as a person and we all know that good looks don’t last long.

The thing about me is that, I’m most attracted to men that make me feel safe, and by that, i mean a guy that I can depend and lean on. The more I feel safe in his presence, the more I’m turned-on by him.

Currently, I’m living with a gay house mate with his bf. Both guys are your typical muscled gay men, narcissistic gym bunnies with hot bodies + good looks. I was really attracted to them at first sight when I first met them but after living with them for over a month. I can’t stand either one of them due to their personalities. The sight of them is really turning me off. They are everything I don’t want my bf to be. I’d rather be a monk than sleep with either one of them.

 

[deleted1074483]

Can you point me in the direction of this community please? Online site? Dating app? As someone who went through a very traumatic experience at a young age 8 years ago (which turned my life upside down,) I gained quite a bit of weight and don’t feel adequate enough to even present myself to any gay men. On grindr, I’ve been called fat twice so I delete the app. My self esteem is in the dumps

im sorry to hear that mate, but you need to deal with your self esteem issues before trying to date - apps/dating sites are brutal and if you're already feeling down, well that'll just add to your overall sense of inadequacy.

I was also very ill about 6/7 years ago now, and I put on 12/15kg (which for me at a normal 70kg is a lot) and went through all you say too. But you just need to reassess what is important, work on your weight for which there is a lot of support online or with a gp/doc and start exercising - I found it was the exercising which helped most, you start to feel 'healthier' overall and worry less about the weight. I'm back down to 69kg now, and feeling much happier and with that came a lot more opportunities with other guys just because I felt and looked more confident and am now with a super guy.

Good luck to you

 

[BlackIsKingSize]

Can you point me in the direction of this community please? Online site? Dating app? As someone who went through a very traumatic experience at a young age 8 years ago (which turned my life upside down,) I gained quite a bit of weight and don’t feel adequate enough to even present myself to any gay men. On grindr, I’ve been called fat twice so I delete the app. My self esteem is in the dumps

BiggerCity is one of the most popular sites/apps. There’s also Chasabl.com which is more social media style. Their app is called Grokio Communities.

Like I said the chub/chaser community has its share of assholes too but I’ve seen plenty of big guys commenting that joining a site where their body was appreciated helped them build confidence. I would also repeat bobbleworc’s advice.

 

[deleted1360704]

Everyone should be loved no matter what they are

 

[diver6]

Some of use cant help it but can be a lot of fun to be with. Weather medical condition or physical type we all have a quality that can be a positive in some way.

 

[malakos]

While there are theories that attempt to argue for an objectivity of aesthetic preference, I think it's typically agreeable that most aesthetic considerations are subjective and variable. We might be willing to speculate that symmetry has an objective aesthetic status. But it's not totally clear. And something like preferring vanilla over chocolate flavors of ice cream would be much more difficult to explain in that way.

I tend to see sexual attraction as similar in form to that type of highly variable and subjective aesthetic sense. Some people find protruding ears attractive. Others find it unappealing, others neutral. Nobody is clearly "right" about the status of prominent ears, so we chalk it up to personal preference. While there is a factor of cultural standards shaping preferences, and that is very much at play with physique, my view is that the cultural values are modifying a preference that at base is rather individualized.

is there any possibility a gay man would like a fat guy. because as far as i know, all gay men LOVE athletic guys with big dicks etc. as much muscle as possible, right?

There are some who prefer "as much muscle as possible", yes.

I actually think it's more common to prefer a guy who is toned and highly fit, than one who is bulky.

As for myself, I often find myself liking guys who are a little on the chunky side. Certainly I prefer that over body builders. A big mass of muscle is not appealing for me.

anyway, i remember walking in downtown at one point and this obese individual, not just fat, but HUGE! so he walked past this gay guy, and the gay guy just went "UGH" in complete disgust, very openly, showing disgruntled look. i thought that was so rude! i sure hope not everyone reacts the same way :/

No. But mentioning this seems to conflate the matters of basic human respect and sexual attraction. One can see an obese person as human and deserving of respect without being able to find their physique sexually appealing.

I'll admit that it's probably uncommon for someone to be sexually attracted to a man who is grossly overweight (assuming that's what you mean by "fat"). I think that applies to hetero/bi women too, though. This does not necessarily entail, however:

1) A lack of respect for obese persons
2) No interest ever in anyone who is at all overweight
3) A preference for guys who are jacked/ripped

There is a vast range between obese and jacked like a body builder. Those are what I would describe as physiques on extremes, the former being an extreme of fatness / overweightness, and the latter being an extreme of muscularity.

 

[malakos]

However, to acknowledge another point you seem to have been wondering about, yes, I would admit that there seems to be in Gay culture an unfortunate amount of prejudice directed against overweight people.

 

[Beardon]

There are men who like us obese men. But its a small subsection. They can be warm and very accepting. They made me feel like I am worthy of being loved.

But on average, yes gay men hate fat men. Obese men especially. Yes they make comments like what you heard, I've gotten them before. It's why I never wanted to come out. You are almost not human to gay men if not in shape. Or you are invisible. Constant reminders on dating apps of "No fats." Hell, even when apps say looking just for friends, no sex they don't talk to you. And I understand, fat isn't really an attractive feature for most. But they can be harsh.

From your dynamite pics, buddy, you are truly a fine example of what would turn me on to the max. Your beautiful black, strong cock is breathtaking. I would love to just wrap my arms around you, start to make out and then see what happens. You are a 10!