Do str8 guys "hate" women??

B_New End

Experimental Member
Joined
Aug 22, 2007
Posts
2,970
Media
0
Likes
20
Points
183
Location
WA
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
One of my favorite quotes is "Men are from Earth. Women are from Earth. Deal with it". :smile:

Cool quote.. (except the deal with it part :p )... but I totally hate that "Men are from mars women are from Venus" shite.

I also can't stand advice and quizzes in cosmo. "what does your man's preference of soda say about him in bed?"

WTF?

I totally believed (too much Oprah) until I was 23, that women actualy did not like sex that much.
 

jason_els

<img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi
Joined
Dec 16, 2004
Posts
10,228
Media
0
Likes
162
Points
193
Location
Warwick, NY, USA
Sexuality
90% Gay, 10% Straight
Gender
Male
I also can't stand advice and quizzes in cosmo. "what does your man's preference of soda say about him in bed?"

WTF?

:chairfall:

Too true!

I totally believed (too much Oprah) until I was 23, that women actualy did not like sex that much.

Wha? Women LIKE sex? I thought it was, "Close your eyes and think of England."
 

whatireallywant

Sexy Member
Joined
Jun 4, 2007
Posts
3,535
Media
0
Likes
30
Points
183
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
Cool quote.. (except the deal with it part :p )... but I totally hate that "Men are from mars women are from Venus" shite.

I also can't stand advice and quizzes in cosmo. "what does your man's preference of soda say about him in bed?"

WTF?

I totally believed (too much Oprah) until I was 23, that women actualy did not like sex that much.

I'm not really so keen on the "Deal with it" part either but I love the first part of the quote! So it's still one of my favorite quotes. :smile:

Oprah says that women don't like sex? :eek: I wouldn't have thought that... I figured she liked sex as much as I do! :biggrin1:

I went to college with a bunch of women who supposedly didn't like sex. But I think it was their upbringings. I had a rather repressive upbringing too but I was a gender rebel from the time I was a toddler! (there are pictures of me taken at age two where in one of them, I was standing with a doll stroller, looking bored, and one playing with a toy train, looking happy and occupied...my parents were open minded about stuff like that so I got a variety of toys, rather than just ones people think of as "for girls".) One of the women in college even said that sex was supposed to hurt women! :eek: Maybe she was with an inconsiderate guy or something, I don't know. Of course, there if a woman admitted she liked sex, she was harrassed for being a "slut" by the other women there (this did happen to me, and I'd only been with one guy at the time!)

I hate Cosmopolitan magazine. 200 pages of gender stereotyping! :mad: Although I have to admit that that quiz title cracked me up - "what does your man's preference in soda say about him in bed" :biggrin1: (that can't be a real quiz!)
 

B_New End

Experimental Member
Joined
Aug 22, 2007
Posts
2,970
Media
0
Likes
20
Points
183
Location
WA
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
Oprah says that women don't like sex? :eek: I wouldn't have thought that... I figured she liked sex as much as I do! :biggrin1:

Most experts on her show would talk about how women don't really like the "physical" aspect of sex, and were much more about the "emotional" aspects and the "closeness"


"what does your man's preference in soda say about him in bed" :biggrin1: (that can't be a real quiz!)
Actually, the recent one I saw, that I drew inspiration from, was from Maxim, "What a man's presidential candidate preference says about his relationship style"
 

whatireallywant

Sexy Member
Joined
Jun 4, 2007
Posts
3,535
Media
0
Likes
30
Points
183
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
Most experts on her show would talk about how women don't really like the "physical" aspect of sex, and were much more about the "emotional" aspects and the "closeness"


Actually, the recent one I saw, that I drew inspiration from, was from Maxim, "What a man's presidential candidate preference says about his relationship style"

OK, so it isn't Oprah herself, but the pop psychologists... Yeah, I think that's why I didn't want to go further with my psychology major. (well, one of the reasons.) I just don't agree with the pop psychologists out there. I think most of us like the physical and the emotional aspects both, when it comes down to it, and which one is more important to us may depend on what stage we are in in our lives, and the person we happen to be with at the time.
 

blacktightfit

Experimental Member
Joined
Mar 2, 2007
Posts
108
Media
12
Likes
7
Points
163
Location
Dallas
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
No, it's more complicated than that, Blacktightfit. At an early age I began to see how self-involved and materialistic young women were that made me slowly begin to realize that this is very skewed. At some point I think I realized all the wining and dining will not get you what you may want -a healthy, stable relationship with a person who is willing to reciprocate. Why should I engage in a game where I'm not expected to benefit from spending my hard-earned money?

For some warped reason most females I knew in school gravitated toward the bad boys/guys that treat them like shit and not the sensible/nice guys like myself. Girls were willing to hang out with the good-looking retard in the back of the class who periodically pulled his dick out than me. Women sometimes make really bad decisions just to stimulate their lives, not saying men don't. I just expected women to be a little more smarter and not think with their hot pockets when they see a Brad Pitt or Denzel Washington type.

In fact, I remember an encounter at 15 years-old that made me affirm that I'd rather be gay than to ever experience what occured with that particular girl. Believe me when I said it traumatized me to be threatened with sexual assault charges just for brushing her leg!

Don't get me wrong I do like women but I think alot of you are just really fucked up in your priorities and have issues. I'm just getting back at women in general by not contributing to their stupidity, not mention their gene pool.

But what women were you looking at to determine they were materialistic and self-involved? Are you saying men can't be that way, I live in Dallas, I know lots of self-involved, materialistic people in general. Wining and dining doesn't equate to a relationship. Trust me, I have been in situations, where I spent my hard earned money on a man who didn't deserve it, I chalk it up to experience and try to learn from it.

In terms of what women gravitate to, I can tell you I have had my share of bad boys, and jerks, BUT I also know many men who have the tendency to be drawn towards those self absorbed, materialistic women and ignore the "good" chicks because they don't have the big boobs, blonde hair, and don't walk around scantily clad in public. I know lots of guys who have actually had attraction to girls, but because the girl didn't fit into an ideal of what beauty is, not date them, because they didn't want to be shamed.

I think that traumatic experience at 15 years old, permanently turned you off from women in general. I know many men (gay and straight) who are just as fucked up and have issues. Trust me I have issues, as well. As a person who has been through therapy due to being sexually abused as a child, and going to support groups, I know people who are like me and hypersexual, as well as those who go to the opposite end of the spectrum and reject sex all the time. Things in our youth traumatize and effect us so much, but we have to take a step back and evaluate why we feel the way we do.
 

blacktightfit

Experimental Member
Joined
Mar 2, 2007
Posts
108
Media
12
Likes
7
Points
163
Location
Dallas
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
True stories:

Guy in my office was on the phone with an upset client. He'd been as patient as can be with her but after he hung-up he exclaimed, "She should go back to mowing the lawn!" Another woman overheard that remark, decided it was sexist, and reported him to personnel for sexual harassment. He was fired. She was promoted.

Just this month I was at a resort with my family and I was detained by security for taking my 6 year old nephew to another building to see a movie. They wanted to make sure I was really his uncle because they'd seen him with my brother and his wife earlier but never with me. My sister, his aunt, had taken him all over the place and nobody batted an eye. I've had similar incidents at my other nephew's playground where the very nice women I talked to actually called the police to check me out because I wasn't my nephew's father or mother. Both times my nephews were upset thinking I or they had done something wrong.

Air New Zealand and Qantas have initiated a policy where they will not place adult men in seats next to an unaccompanied minor.

Sign at the health club in the next town over states that boys under 16 must use the single changing room set aside for that purpose and are not allowed in the men's changing room. There is no similar sign on the women's changing room.

I certainly do not blame feminism for these attitudes. I blame a culture where those in power cultivate fear among the people to keep them in control. God knows how I managed to survive being a kid. I had no idea there are pedophiles hiding behind every tree, in every airline seat, or in every locker room.

In a sense, as much as a man can be, I am a feminist. I believe in the right person for the job and equal rights for everyone. My mom's an Emma Willard girl and even before she graduated in the 50s Emma Willard was teaching girls to go out and compete in a sexist world. No braces on the brains for these girls; they were taught everything that was taught in boys' private schools. As a result my mom worked before working mothers were the norm and let me tell you, the comments I heard from the other moms in the neighborhood were less than flattering. My mom worried about it but I told her I was proud that she worked if she wanted to. I liked having a mother that was well-educated and used her talents out in the world. It was different and I knew my mother was smarter, though likely just better educated, than the other moms. Both my parents and both my sisters have advanced degrees and I'm very proud of their accomplishments. In my household, and despite my father having some old fashioned ideas of women being barefoot and pregnant, I didn't follow his example. His luddism also had much to do with my parents getting divorced :wink:.

For every story you have about women getting over on men, I am sure there are countless I could tell you about men getting away with literally murder, while women don't. The example about the guy getting fired, if soley for that, is extremely sad, and isn't the norm.

In terms of the people assuming you are a pedophile, I have never had the experience of someone assuming I am a stranger kidnapping a child, so I really can't relate, and if that has happened that is truly sad, but unfortunately the world we live in, and I say as long as your nephew and you know what is going on, damn the other people. In terms of your aunts and sisters walking with the child and people not batting an eyelash, typically speaking, people make the assumption they are the mother or a care taker, as traditionally women fill those roles in our society, it doesn't make it right, but it is assumed. Kind of like people assuming when I am shopping based upon being black I am wanting to steal from them or the store I am in. It sucks, but unfortunately, I am used to it.

In terms of health clubs, men's locker rooms are known for cruising, the club maybe had too much cruising going on, or someone's parents got uptight and they implemented the rule, the gym I attend I don't think have that rule, but they also have employees constantly in BOTH locker rooms, so it is hard for anything too risque to occur in the locker rooms.

In terms of equality, in America it is very subjective. We have too warped of a history, and too much ignorance of others cultures to ever be completely equal, I have just learned to accept it, and try to counter it when ever I see it.
 

fivesalive

Sexy Member
Joined
May 15, 2007
Posts
149
Media
17
Likes
50
Points
248
Location
texas
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
i'll put it this way... i only want to hang with people i think are cool, so any female that isn't is around just for me to have sex with or try to have sex with (or because i can't get away from them).

but, the cool as hell girls are hard to come by, and i think being cool is damn sexy, which makes me wanna have sex with them too. doesn't mean i get to, doesn't mean they even know i would... but its there.

sex really doesn't have any hold on whether i think they are cool or will relate to a person tho. without it i suppose i'd just act like they're a dude, like i do already with my best friend's girlfriend.
 

jason_els

<img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi
Joined
Dec 16, 2004
Posts
10,228
Media
0
Likes
162
Points
193
Location
Warwick, NY, USA
Sexuality
90% Gay, 10% Straight
Gender
Male
For every story you have about women getting over on men, I am sure there are countless I could tell you about men getting away with literally murder, while women don't. The example about the guy getting fired, if soley for that, is extremely sad, and isn't the norm.

These aren't instances of women, "getting over on men," they're instances of a society deciding that all men are potential threats to children and women and that women are somehow unthreatening:

According to the American Anthropological Association, more than 200 women kill their children in the United States each year. Three to five children a day are killed by their parents. Homicide is one of the leading causes of death of children under age four, yet we continue to "persist with the unrealistic view that this is rare behavior," says Jill Korbin, expert on child abuse, who has studied mothers who killed their children.

We should detach from the idea of universal motherhood as natural and see it as a social response," Nancy Scheper-Hughes, medical anthropologist says.

Women in jail reported that no-one believed them when they said they wanted to kill their children. "There's a collective denial even when mothers come right out and say, "I really shouldn't be trusted with my kids." -About.com

In terms of the people assuming you are a pedophile, I have never had the experience of someone assuming I am a stranger kidnapping a child, so I really can't relate, and if that has happened that is truly sad, but unfortunately the world we live in, and I say as long as your nephew and you know what is going on, damn the other people. In terms of your aunts and sisters walking with the child and people not batting an eyelash, typically speaking, people make the assumption they are the mother or a care taker, as traditionally women fill those roles in our society, it doesn't make it right, but it is assumed. Kind of like people assuming when I am shopping based upon being black I am wanting to steal from them or the store I am in. It sucks, but unfortunately, I am used to it.

That's horrible. When I worked in the mall as a teen I saw that. What bothered me, and my brother and sister was that neither of my nephews knew what was going on. We were stopped and these people in, or what looked like, police uniforms wouldn't let us go on. That frightened both of my nephews because both put it together that if we couldn't go play then we must have done something wrong. The police situation was particularly bad because they separated us and when my nephew wanted to come back to me, the policeman wouldn't let him. I kept telling him it was alright and we can trust the police :rolleyes: in an effort to calm him, but until my sister showed-up, I was treated like a criminal though they didn't handcuff me or anything. It was traumatic for all of us. My nephew kept asking my sister again and again for weeks to tell him the story of when he and Jason talked to the police and mommy came to get him. Even if it isn't my fault, I felt guilty because I keep wondering if it was something I said, the way I was dressed, or if I did something to increase suspicion. I'm old enough to figure it all out but he isn't. My sister is a clinical social worker so I'm confident she knows how to handle all this but why should she have to?

In terms of health clubs, men's locker rooms are known for cruising, the club maybe had too much cruising going on, or someone's parents got uptight and they implemented the rule, the gym I attend I don't think have that rule, but they also have employees constantly in BOTH locker rooms, so it is hard for anything too risque to occur in the locker rooms.

It's still a sexist rule though and it stigmatizes men unfairly.

In terms of equality, in America it is very subjective. We have too warped of a history, and too much ignorance of others cultures to ever be completely equal, I have just learned to accept it, and try to counter it when ever I see it.

I can't imagine what it's like to be black here in the US. One of my black coworkers was showing me his car and I saw all these stickers on it about pre-paid legal services and PBA support. I joked him about them but he looked at me evenly and said, "You don't get pulled-over for DWB." Here, in New York, a well-dressed black man in nice car will still get pulled over for DWB. The town where my office is had a PD so corrupt that the state took it over, yet he felt he needed the stickers for other places too. I could sympathize, but I couldn't relate until these incidents happened to me and I immediately admit that my experiences are probably minor compared to what discrimination must be like for blacks in the US.

It all blows hairy llama wang. We are so uptight, so ready to see evil in our fellow citizens because we have such artificial and limited contact with them. The sensationalist media doesn't help either.
 

blacktightfit

Experimental Member
Joined
Mar 2, 2007
Posts
108
Media
12
Likes
7
Points
163
Location
Dallas
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
I'm old enough to figure it all out but he isn't. My sister is a clinical social worker so I'm confident she knows how to handle all this but why should she have to?
She shouldn't have to, but due to ignorance of others she will so that her child's questions can be answered.

In terms of the locker room, you are right it is sexist. I don't know how to resolve it except to do with my gym does and always have someone in both locker rooms to maintain it. If there is always someone there, there isn't too much to be concerned with sexual or not.

I can't imagine what it's like to be black here in the US. One of my black coworkers was showing me his car and I saw all these stickers on it about pre-paid legal services and PBA support. I joked him about them but he looked at me evenly and said, "You don't get pulled-over for DWB." Here, in New York, a well-dressed black man in nice car will still get pulled over for DWB. The town where my office is had a PD so corrupt that the state took it over, yet he felt he needed the stickers for other places too. I could sympathize, but I couldn't relate until these incidents happened to me and I immediately admit that my experiences are probably minor compared to what discrimination must be like for blacks in the US.

It all blows hairy llama wang. We are so uptight, so ready to see evil in our fellow citizens because we have such artificial and limited contact with them. The sensationalist media doesn't help either.

The media has never helped at ALL. I hate that in the media we are a collective that all thinks alike, as if we have meetings. As if Al Sharpton was elected a black leader and speaks for all black people. Per the media we all love hip hop, clothes, Crystal, and tricked out cars. We also have lots of kids out of wedlock, live in poverty, are less educated, and sport gold teeth. But it isn't like some horrible life being black in America, especially now. Yes you deal with racism or whatever other crap there is, but you get over it. Race isn't something I am obsessed over, but you always get that thing in the back of your mind when someone is following you in a store.