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Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by Chaz, Feb 20, 2007.
What do people think is the correct balance between chasing a girl while not looking too keen?
It has to be done just right. With utter confidence and by someone alluring enough to make her want to be caught. It's almost better to do luring and reeling-in rather than chasing. Only chase if you have to, or do it in combination with enticing and luring.
If you seem desperate at all...chasing won't work. If you display lack of confidence or self-assurance...chasing won't work. And if she has point blank told you to go away already...it won't work.
But many a passionate romance has its beginnings in a chase.
If you are already involved with a woman, and she runs (in most cases)...chase her! She may be feeling insecure and looking for reassurance that you really love her.
Many a passionate romance has ended with a woman walking away, and a man not having the guts to go after her.
Never chased a woman in my life. Once you let a woman know you want it she isnt in a hurry to give it up.. If i were to date a woman now i wouldnt even kiss her till mabye the fourth date. I wouldnt even touch here. I would do lots of holding doors and pulling out a chair so she could sit down.. At the end of two weeks she would be begging me to fuck her and pay for the motel. She would even put gas in my car. Then on monday morning U.P.S. would deliver a gold chain from her. It works everytime....... Well there is one i chased and im glad i did. She out smarted me at my own game:wink: :tongue: Yes woman like to be chased so they can tease you and taunt you........
You have to chase SOMETIMES....":biggrin1:
Well ok sometimes:tongue:
Well..dont really know the "formula" what I can say that some men become very attractive to me as knowing how to "dance" right when they want to have my attention. But is not something fake but natural as he is himself while doing it...its cool because his expression pop ups unique as himself and this is what it is interesting to me.
But in the end I will embrace closer when for sure there are brain vibes chemistry, sensual tension, etc etc others I will be just flatered but it will not really fly anywhere. But we all must see a "no" answer as not rejecting of our total selfs but only not a good flow matching.
What I dont like is some that keep insisting when we give clear signals "NO" and they keep insisting. Goal oriented people are great but in this area can be annoying.
Every man who's interested in a woman should read this.
The guts? Or the desire? It's one thing to woo her, which is fun, but quite another to interpret her behavior as the opposite of what she really wants. Those kinds of mind games are unhealthy. How is the guy supposed to know she's not really leaving? If she is really leaving, then having "the guts to go after her" becomes his justification for stalking her. And if she makes it clear that she's not really leaving, just demanding extra attention, then my first reaction is to think, "How often is she going to do this? And is it worth the trouble?"
In my experience, it's better to take someone at their word than to assume they're playing a game that you have to join in on. If you treat romance like a game, then you shouldn't be surprised if the other person suddenly decides not to play anymore.
I'm sure most of our female members here at LPSG would prefer to be chased, rather than to be chaste.
Yeh I do agree with you that some games can be played and some people use the "prove" games...as going away to see if he/she will run after...but it can be a 2 blade knife situation as things are not clearly estabilished inside themselves and mixing messages, lack of clear communication, stands etc etc it can get confusing.
For this motive I myself cant scape as selecting the ones who are a match for my expressing exchanging style, I'm a str8 foward person, enjoy and need clear communications to flow way before really get things more serious. If we are not into same pace I just move on and conclude we are not supose to be together anyways.
I understood the OP post a situation that is not a relationship of any sort yet, just a initial approach. We work and keep working in already estabilished relationships if its getting fruitfull and somewhere, really. I dont insist in something is already dying or dead, as much the realization of it can hurt, its waste of time delaying things that are not working.
But I do understand too that some people not having guts for going after what they really want is a red light. I still think if they really want and loose like that as not going after is not a person that we would really be acttracted to anyways, most of us go 'bad' after what we really want and are into to...or maybe a person is not even "ready" for us at that point in time or never will be, really...
I think every man and woman are different. I will tell you of a few relationships i have ruined simply by saying I Love You too soon.:smile: So to the op go slow and easy. Good luck to you........
Its nice to know a man is interested but its hard to know when/if it becomes more about his determination and getting what he wants. It happened to me before, as soon as i gave in and said ok he lost interest and become really distant and a jerk.
Yes for me too it was a tricky game to play. I remember one relationship years ago everything going great. After about a month i said I love you and things were never the same. It isnt easy for a man or a woman. Thank god i dont have to play this game anymore. I will not play this game anymore.........
Yes, I like to be chased because I love the building sexual tension; however, when I am not interested in someone I don't even engage in the game.
Man, i'm getting pissed with my present game. One minute she is all game on, next she doesn't reply to my text messages, then she is all "looking forward" to hook up, next she isn't replying to my next contact. Now i am twiddling my thumbs waiting to see if she still wants to meet. I'll give it one more try.
I'm usually an ice man but this one time is getting to me. Really trying to play the cool customer but inside i'm all wound up..... This girl is just confusing me, not sure if she just isn't keen, shy or just playing the game....
Friday will be the judge....
No luck... saturday is another day/night.........
Chaz, sounds like she's teasing, but you never know...hope she's worth it.
Chasing don't work. They can all run way faster than I can.:redface:
If you made me wait that long, I would kill you. :tongue:
But patience isn't one of my strong points.