Do women tell future partners details of past partners?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by B_starinvestor, Aug 2, 2006.

  1. B_starinvestor

    B_starinvestor New Member

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    A while ago my wife had an affair that was going on for about 3 months before I found out about it. We separated but eventually got back together. I have learned that this guy had a very long penis (figures). We know many people in common, and I am wondering if my wife ever said something like "your penis is so much longer than my husband's" to which he may have spread that around. I may be acting paranoid but has anyone had experiences like this? I have not heard anything like this, but if that rumour was spread I'm sure no one would say anything to me about it.
     
  2. Isabella

    Isabella New Member

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    First of all, I'm sorry you are having to deal with this. I'm married as well and would be devastated if my husband strayed. That being said, I'm wondering why your wife would give you details regarding his penis size...it seems obvious to me that this kind of disclosure will do nothing but add kerosene to an already raging inferno. Is she committed to mending the relationship? Are you?
    I can honestly say I would have no idea how I would handle your dilemma especially since this sounds like a guy you might see around town (if I'm reading your post correctly).
     
  3. jfrsndvs

    jfrsndvs Member

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    sounds to me that what she is trying to do is make you hurt more, if I am reading this correctly, you two were already separated when she had the affair, if so, was the purpose of separation divorce? if so, then I wouldn't put any more thought into this. however, if the purpose of the separation was to work some things out and not get a divorce, then I would question her actions of the affair.

    sounds to me that she is a evil evil woman, I hope that you don't have any kids with her.
     
  4. B_starinvestor

    B_starinvestor New Member

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    Well, we seperated because of the affair. I found out about the size thing from another woman who slept with the guy. I was the first guy my wife had ever slept with so it was something that was quite bothersome. I do think she is committed to this because we have been back together for a year now. I just would like to know what was said to people I know - its easy to feel kind of foolish. Its probably better that I don't know.
     
  5. Ethyl

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    Rumours are usually discovered by the subject second hand, if at all. Unfortunately, the truth is that men and women often talk about their former lovers to their current lovers, at least to some extent. I'm sorry to hear about your plight. I don't want to make you more paranoid than you already seem. You can't change what happened but you can decide what you want and need right now, whether she's part of the picture or not.
     
  6. rawbone8

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    Self confidence is generally considered more attractive, on balance, than merely being the owner of a long dick, and now she's back with you. Or put another way, insecurity is quite unattractive to most people. Keep your dignity and no one can ever take that away from you. It's worthwhile discussing it here, but in the end only you can make yourself feel better.

    Here's a question. If you heard from the same woman who slept with this guy, that he was only average endowment, but confirmed to have the most talented tongue in the state, would you feel just as worried? Or is this only about silly measuring tapes?

    As painful as the affair was, it's best to address and neutralize these feelings of inadequacy or worries of who heard what, and from whom. Stand tall and be the best that you can be.
     
  7. B_horribleperson

    B_horribleperson New Member

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    you got back with her????????

    that is just asking for trouble $10,000 she cheats on you again
     
  8. N2jocks

    N2jocks New Member

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    I know women talk to other women about the size of a mans cock...but I think if a straight man was to tell other straight men...they might think he was wierd or gay. As others have said...don't worry about it. By rthe looks of your oics you have a decent dick....maybe thicker than some....a lot of women liek thick over longer
     
  9. sares

    sares New Member

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    people talk and yes it's possible it will get around.

    but if you're worried about people knowing your dick isn't as big as his, you're worried about the wronnnng thing, buddy.
     
  10. Desmond_decker

    Desmond_decker New Member

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    This actaully implies that onwers of large penises would be more successful than others in sleeping will other men's wives. Which seems to be true. People who research "extra-pair matings" have some .correlating evidence this. Worst this information may be carried in scent
     
  11. jfrsndvs

    jfrsndvs Member

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    in this case, the less you know the better off you are, and don't worry about what other people have said about you, chances are whatever was originally said in the begining has been fabricated over and over again. and to be honest, she may be totally committed right now after a year, I sure hope that she did learn a valuable lesson here, but there is that little voice in the back of you head wandering if she is really at the store or whereever and not screwing around.

    as for that woman who told you that he was much bigger than you, I would have told the cheap whore to get lost! and does this woman know how big you are? did you show it to her? chances are she is getting her information about your size from a second source. I personally would concentrate more on the marriage right now, I hope that she doesn't mess around on you again. my ex wife messed around on me, I found out, and the bitch is history, and now she is on her 3rd husband.

    Good Luck and forget about what anybody is saying about you, and for gods sake don't worry about the size of the other guys pecker. there are more important things to worry about.
     
  12. Mumzi

    Mumzi New Member

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    Before we tar & feather the woman- she did not tell hubby anything, he heard this through rumor.
    People can make it work even after affairs, but it will take a long time to build back the trust. Trust would be the problem for me.

    Did she tell the guy he had great equipment, even better than her husbands?
    Maybe so. But would any women say that,no matter who was bigger?
    Maybe so. Personally I'm going with probably so. At that moment she felt this was the guy. She wanted to flatter him.

    I think most people would realize that anything she said about her husband while having an affair would be from her prospective 'at that time'.
    At that time the 'guy' was better than her husband and she (any woman) might say anything that made sense or felt right at that time.

    Would those comments be true? Who knows, but if she did tell anyone or him that he was bigger than you, most people would take it for what it is worth.
    Of course she would flatter 'him' at that time.

    Let's take it a step further. No one knows what she said to him, but him.
    Now he has lost her to her husband. He may tell someone that he is larger,that she told him he was; but that statement could his way of getting back at you. Most people would certainly realize what's going on there.
    A confident man has nothing to prove.

    I would not worry about it. There may have been things said, and there may still be things said, but at this point much of it may be sour grapes.
    Most people would know that.

     
  13. rawbone8

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    That may be your interpretation of my post, but it is definitely not my meaning nor my intent. I think you are reading and projecting your own ideas. I don't agree at all.

    Confidence can be based on many factors. My point is that another man's penis size is not this guy's real problem. Worrying about it is irrational and may contribute to his sense of injury, weakness and insecurity. My advice is to be strong, seek help if need be, but ultimately, be confident in himself.

    That, and understanding that his trust in his partner and the future of this marriage depends on him and his wife addressing the real reasons for the affair. I think it is too convenient to divert attention toward that aspect (another man's dick size and fear of gossip) instead of dealing with realities that matter. That's where the hard and possibly painful work probably lies.
     
  14. Love-it

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    In our case I pestered my wife into telling me if the reason that she had an affair was because of sexual dissatisfaction with me and if the guy she had an affair with was bigger than me, her response was that he was "about your size".

    What we finally realized was that she was totally confused about life, she had a lousy childhood. It took a year or so before we could even really talk about our life together and the affair sensibly. We went to a marriage counselor who was very good for about 4 months and then she went by herself for several years, gradually tapering off.

    The affair was 17 years ago and we are still together.
     
  15. OmahaBeef

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    Dont EVER ask a woman about how many guys they've been with, or how your cock compares to the ones she's been with....because you will NEVER get the straight answer, and even if you did you wouldnt want to hear it anyway...

    Affairs suck. Have some self respect and rid yourself of this burden you call darling.


    OmahaBeef
     
  16. sares

    sares New Member

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    bah, sez you!

    I love discussing sexual history, mine and his. it's a huge factor in understanding who we are and how we came to be that way. and if we weren't each other's best, we wouldn't be married. so there's no feelings of competition -- we've already won.

    I guess if I was still dating around I'd have to be careful of my current partner's ego. so thank god I'm not. :tongue:
     
  17. thickestone

    thickestone New Member

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    So true. Women can't seem to tell the truth or the "truth" changes so many times
     
  18. gunit56_17

    gunit56_17 New Member

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    One of my wife's gf at work has a boyfriend who is well endowed, he sends her phone pics of his cock all the time so my wife's gf shows my wife... not a good thing... she sent me a text message after one of these showings it read " I just saw Paul's not so teenie weenie again!" So I sent her a picture of my teenie weenie and told her she could show what she had to put up with. She says she didn't but I don't know for sure... I was hoping she did... but as they say becareful what you ask for or at least becareful of what your wife's gf shows her!
     
  19. rope9839

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    I've got somewhat of a reverse relationship with an ex. Basically, ever since we broke up she tells me about her new boyfriends - especially her estimations of their size and comparing to me. I know she is kind of a size queen pushing my buttons, but that's alright.

    The most recent event was kind of a double whammy. I posted awhile back about a new girlfriend with an unfortunately shallow vagina. After breaking off with her (for more reasons that a too small pussy), I was out with the ex for a few drinks. Because it is natural in our relationship, I shared my latest struggles with her. She was sympathetic and mentioned that her latest beau lacked my "natural gifts." To make a long story short, we ended up in bed and the sex just rocked. If nothing else, she knows how to make me feel like a king stud.

    We'll never end up together, as we aren't a great match as mates. But, in terms of long term fuck buddies, I think we both know a good thing when we see it.
     
  20. B_starinvestor

    B_starinvestor New Member

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    I have to imagine that in the throws of passion if a woman had never been with a large penis before she would probably comment on it and it would add excitement to the rendezvous.
     
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