I lost a friend over a jerkassboy. One of my oldest and absolutely closest friends, too.
This guy was such a jerkass that he was rude to TheBF over and over again, which is extremely hard to do, like kicking a puppy, but I suppose that he was feeling jealous over TheBF's accomplishments or something and he attacked TheBF right in front of me over some erroneous assumptions, like being a "rich boy" and having everything given to him and having the right connections that's responsible for his success. TheBF paid for his college himself, got through it in 3.5 years, spent a lot of that time using a bedroll to sleep on the floor in the cheapest room he could find so that he could make it through without incurring debt, saved up enough money for a down payment to buy his first house a semester before he graduated, and his first year after college he made more money than both of his parents combined because he comes from a modest background. He's a self-made man, and so modest about it, and sweet and kind to others, and you'd have to be a real jerkass to make him the unwarranted target of personal attacks on his character, but that's what kind of jerk this guy is. He had literally just met TheBF, didn't know a thing about him, and less than an hour later was attacking him based upon stupid assumptions that he had made, even though TheBF had been nothing but friendly to him. What a jerkass! And for what reason? :confused22:
That wasn't an isolated incident. He treated me the same way, and total strangers, and waitresses, and his "friends" too, from what I could tell.
At first I thought that his behavior was a reaction because we had met before, and he had acted like a total jackass then! I was in one of my favorite hangouts, a little hole-in-the-wall bar where my then boyfriend worked as a bartender. It was the middle of the afternoon, the place was almost totally empty and the jukebox was off. I was drinking a beer at the bar and reading a book. It was lovely. Then this arrogant jerk strolls in. I knew his type. Lots of women like men like him, the confident arrogant "alpha dog" type, as some women describe them. I call them Jerks. He was an old "friend" of my boyfriend's from school, and he proceeded to hit on me right in front of my boyfriend. I just returned from a mountain climbing vacation and I was tan and my legs were much more muscular than usual, possibly ever, and I was wearing my hiking boots and shorts which showed them off. He struck up a conversation and we talked about mountain climbing. He claimed that he was currently working on a movie about mountain climbing that was going to be shot on a particular mountain, which he said was in Mexico (he got the country wrong, which I noticed immediately), and that if I wanted to come along, I could! He could arrange it, and wouldn't that be exciting and fun? He was obviously just trying to sleep with me and he assumed I'd be so easy that telling me about this movie would make me roll over and spread my legs for him. What a jerk. My boyfriend kept looking at him like, "You are still a jerk." I was amused by his pathetic attempt to pick me up and I formed a strong opinion of him.
So I initially thought that his jerkass behavior towards me and my love were because of that original embarrassing encounter with him years ago. Nope. It turns out that he's a jerk all the time. To everyone. In lots of different jerkass ways. He's a Master of Jerkishness.
The final straw happened when I went to visit my friend and I stayed the weekend with her and this jerkass. He attacked me non-stop, and she kept making excuses for him. I felt bad for her and I wasn't bothered when she acknowledged that he acting like a jerk and she was clearly embarrassed by his behavior and she would explain that he had issues from being adopted by wealthy people (Yeah, the hypocrisy, right?) who treated their biological son better than him, and his abandonment issues, etc, etc, etc. It was when she began justifying his behavior that my feelings towards her began changing. That's when I began noticing how she never said anything when he was a jerk. She never called him out or intervened, no matter what the situation was. For a long time, I thought she was just attempting to be diplomatic, but then it started to seem like she just didn't think his behavior was really that bad, and then it began to seem like sometimes she was on his side! It was like she was around his obnoxious behavior so much that she had lost all ability to discern what was appropriate behavior and what wasn't. He turned her into a jerkass, too!
