Do you avoid sleeping with people, because you are afraid they will fall in love?
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Principessa
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New End have you tried being less spectacular in bed? It didn't work the 2 times I tried it; but it might work for you. The only thing more awkward than that next morning wondering why they are lingering, is when he calls to ask if you want to get together for a movie or dinner. I can remember stammering out, "uhmm no, I thought that was a one night stand."
:lmao: So don't bring them home, go to their place. Leave when you want. Problem solved. :tongue:
No, but I am suddenly glad I am not prone to one-night-stands anymore.
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HazelGod
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nashboy
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- art,
Agree even before the clothes come off the boundaries of the evening. Like say you have an 8 o'clock class, even if you don't. Or you've got to get home early because your brother needs to borrow the car. Or you've go to go to work.
(BTW, I would use all of these excuses at once!)
The point if, the guy knows in advance that he's not staying much beyond sunrise, so make the most of the the time you've got.
If the sex is great, call him back for a date on a night when your next day's schedule is more "open" and maybe you can spend some more quality time snogging and snuggling in the mutual afterglow.
I never want to spend the next day with one-night stands. The whole point of the encounter is it's a cute guy you don't know, but whom you hope is sexy and sweet. (And showered and wears clean underwear....I could go on for days!)
(BTW, I would use all of these excuses at once!)
The point if, the guy knows in advance that he's not staying much beyond sunrise, so make the most of the the time you've got.
If the sex is great, call him back for a date on a night when your next day's schedule is more "open" and maybe you can spend some more quality time snogging and snuggling in the mutual afterglow.
I never want to spend the next day with one-night stands. The whole point of the encounter is it's a cute guy you don't know, but whom you hope is sexy and sweet. (And showered and wears clean underwear....I could go on for days!)
YES. THIS IS MEEEEE. and i would also be more willing to experiment with another guy, except its hard to find another 24 year old in the same position as me... most guys willing to experiment with me are gay or bi with experience. i am afraid of them being too attached. but the same goes for girls... i am not willing to commit myself to anything at this stage in my life.
kalipygian
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No. Rather it is a disappointment when a guy gets off, and then rolls away and ignores me, and does not want to cuddle.
strike4
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I definitely have the problem of people becoming attached...
It doesn't stop me from having good sex, but it makes me think twice about who I will take home. If you are only looking for sex, a bar is a good place to meet people. When you go home with someone from a bar, there are few expectations for the next day. It gets trickier when it's someone in your social circle.
It doesn't stop me from having good sex, but it makes me think twice about who I will take home. If you are only looking for sex, a bar is a good place to meet people. When you go home with someone from a bar, there are few expectations for the next day. It gets trickier when it's someone in your social circle.
D_Ollyvalle Treegirth
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I don't avoid hook-ups, b/c I never assume in advance this (the otehr guy getting a crush) could happen. but it DOES. It's distressing to think that a simple roll in the hay could give someone the worng impression. I can't bear to hurt anyone, and would have avoided the whole tihng to begin with if I'd known. There are a lot of people out there who really are lonely I think. I'm not blaming them, but hunting for sex is probably not the best way to find a partner.
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Well, it's not easy if she is hot chick, lol. But, after first sex, i try to put it clear, what I am interested in... Usually after while they accept it well. If not, then goodbye...
I must admit i do get attached easily at times (but only in relationships). If I ask for only sex then its fine. He wont expect a relationship and i surely wont. Maybe fucking partners or something. sex on a regular basis would be fine without being in a relationship if it is agreed to. If the sex with this person is really good i probably would only have sex with that person but because there wont be a relationship i would still flirt, talk and have phone sex with others.
Yeah, this has always been one of my issues too. I used to think I was strange for not wanting commitment from girls - like I'd make out with one at a party or something and she'd assume we were together from that moment on, whereas I'd be like "what? I never wanted that". It happened often enough that I thought there was something wrong with me. It's only as I get older that I realize what a faulty system cohabitation/monogamy etc. really is - I can't believe any man is genuinely okay with it. To be fair, I've never been in love or even in awe of any woman, but a lot of guys I speak to have the same reluctance with regards to getting attached. It seems at times that as a man, you can even be perfectly happy with your partner and still want more. Even if I do meet Ms. Right, I still get the feeling that I'll never want to stop sowing my wild oats.
Yes...well, at least I think about it. I like to be wanted. I like that feeling. So I don't want to hold back. I want whoever I'm with to love me. I don't know how to be into someone enough to make sex great for them, then tell them that I don't like them that much. It's less a concern as I get older. I think the key is to just be honest with your partner and remain firm if he/she becomes attached.
midlifebear
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I must be living on a completely different planet. The majority of these posts make no sense to me at all.
Lex
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- Lex,
A lot of people confuse sex with love. AlteredEgo made some really good posts about this in another thread. When I dated women, I was totally honest about NOT loving them if I didn't. I never said "I love you" just to get laid and I never said I was dating someone exclusively if I wasn't. With dating men, well, it has never been a problem (confusing sex with love).
- Lito,
Yes, I've been avoiding some problems lately. Frankly, I feel guilty when I see those 'loving eyes' and all I want is for the person to get out so I can enjoy my own company for a bit.
And, no matter how clear you are, people do get attached. Red flags all around when I get a call for a movie...
There's the other side of the coin too... not wanting to sleep with someone so I won't get attached.
oh well, life was never supposed to be simple, I suppose.
And, no matter how clear you are, people do get attached. Red flags all around when I get a call for a movie...
There's the other side of the coin too... not wanting to sleep with someone so I won't get attached.
oh well, life was never supposed to be simple, I suppose.
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