Do you consider yourself "marriage material"?

[Riven650]

Me too :redface:

:tongue:

 

[D_Petherick_Poundlouder]

Not in the least.

I'm 21, love woman but recently became sexually confused, in college, don't have the slightest idea how I'm going to get my dreams out...well that's a lie - I have a great idea how - but executing it. Well, that - that is where the real work will come into, and I'm scared. Therefore I'm feeling moody, insecure, unsure of myself, which leads back to that first sentence.

Not in the least.

 

[Riven650]

I'm sure you won't always feel like that about it Ajoi.

 

[sxjTheFirst]

I am a bit pissed by these people who seem to presume that those of us who aren't interested in marriage are somehow to be pitied.

1. back in the early days of civilization humans lived isolated tribes and it was distinct possibility that a plague or natural disaster would wipe out an entire civilization. Also the chances of being invaded by an hostile tribe was high. So they had to maximize their numbers and have a lot of males who could fight. So they came up with assembly line reproduction aka monogamy and marriage. Not just the alphas but all men and women would produce children and keep the tribe stocked. Is any of this applicable in our overpopulated world?

2. contraception wasn't that great and pregnancy was the result of sex so to take care of the children they needed to have someone support the kids. Now we can plan pregnancy a lot better.

3. women weren't financially independent so if they had children they needed the support of the man preferably the one who fathered the child. Now women can have a career too.

So is it really that bad to not be interested in an archaic institution? I am OK if some people love the concept. I try not be patronizing to them and I expect the same from them.

 

[spiritsong72]

Am I marriage material? Depends on the situation. Every circumstance is different. Every relationship is different. I may be marriage material in one relationship but not in another. Further, is the person I'm dating marriage material for me? Again, every relationship is different. Sometimes yes, sometimes no. I will say it sucks when one is picking out china patterns and the other is planning their escape route.

Do I eventually want to find someone to marry? Yes. But just because I'm the "marrying kind" doesn't mean I'll find someone that is willing to marry me. Add to that if I did find someone I wanted to marry, we'd both have to be on the same page as far as seeing marriage material in the other person. And most of all, we would have to share enough core values to make that marriage work. Haven't found that yet and he hasn't found me, but I refuse to give up hope.

"Be the person you want to marry."

 

[D_Cock_Hudson]

I would hope that everyone would consider themselves to be marriage material, even if like me, they have never met someone they'd think about marrying. The missing piece in the jigsaw has always for me been the intellectual side, the common interests and outlook.

 

[stratedude]

I've come to the conclusion (at least in my case) that marriage is only for raising children. I thought I married my best friend - a girl that I was extremely attracted to and I got along with her very well. We liked the same shows on TV and enjoyed doing a lot of things together. But most of all she SEEMED like to to talk about the same things and agreed on most points.

Well it turns out she was artificially creating my perfect mate in order for me to marry her. She has since changed her preference in a lot of things which makes us much less compatible, and the icing on the cake is that she can't bring herself to watch her weight anymore which has ruined our intimacy.

Now I feel like we are tolerating each other to give our kids the best chance at a decent future. But the way things are now, I can't imagine wanting to stick around if there weren't kids involved.

My advice to all you guys and girls out there - BE YOURSELF AND BE HONEST. If your mate doesn't like you for who you are and you have to fake it, how long do you think you can keep up with the charade? Years? Decades? Why would you do that?? And please put less emphasis on looks especially if you are a guy. Because you have a very small window in which you will be physically attracted to them before they no longer have it in them to stay fit. After that you'll need to be compatible on a deeper level.

 

[MercyfulFate]

I did but now I think marriage is a stupid sham, so no.

 

[deleted3782]

I think the idea of marriage material is a moving target. Marriage in order for it to work means WORK and the ability to compromise. There are some for whom this is not necessarily a priority. THere is a term for them out there. They are called "Quirky Alones".

from the website Relationships & Romance at Romanceopedia

Single and fulfilled?

Absolutely!

In fact, those who fit this simple, yet, startling description can now formally refer to themselves as "quirkyalones."

The phrase was recently coined by Sasha Cagen, a thirty-year-old author, who refers to those seemingly happy and solitary singletons (single or resingled) using this new term throughout her book of the same name.

Those who qualify for this cute but descriptive title will find themselves in good company with the likes of Cher, George Clooney, Steve Martin, and Oprah Winfrey, to name just a few. They are part of a growing population in our society who live full and fun lives without feeling the need to be party to a formalized marital relationship. In fact many quirkyalones see no reason to even date for the purpose of coupling. Their approach to being with others has more to do with friendship and companionship without the need for pursuing a primary relationship. Their need for independency, for any number of reasons, precludes the necessity for a "significant other" in their lives.

Read more here.

 

[invisibleman]

I am not gay marriage material. Happy for those who are marriage material.

Life and love is unfair for some. And it seems that I am successful at being unsuccessful at gay dating.