Do you get revenge or move on?

[Rubenesque]

I get the whole - living well is the best revenge thing. But he lives in Sheffield and I live in Peterborough. We don't know any of the same people or mix in any of the same circles. And I'd want the mofo to know I was living well.

So, as I can't hold my head high and show him I'm doing fine without him... I want to ruin him. Is that wrong? haha

 

[Fleur]

Moving on is the best revenge. It helps too if your life is much better (i.e. more healthy, happy, successful etc.) after the fact...

 

[Fleur]

So, as I can't hold my head high and show him I'm doing fine without him... I want to ruin him. Is that wrong? haha

But what would ruining him prove? Probably that you are petty, mean-spirited to others even if you're not...after the anger settles down, it's not going to be worth it. If you go through with any kind of revenge, the perceived euphoria/happiness you'll get out of it will fade and the anger and pain is still going to be there.

It's fine to not wish him well...but, showing you're fine without him is the best revenge, trust me. Especially because it's the kind of "revenge" that will actually benefit you. If he at all said to you that you couldn't be fine without him or couldn't do x, y, z with your life, why not prove him wrong?

 

[Fleur]

That is the best revenge.

My first ex, whom I haven't talked to or seen in over 24 yrs calls my mom from time to time just to find out about me. Her answers are always the same. "She happy and has a wonderful life." What better revenge is there than that?

Exactly. My ex does the same and I haven't spoken to him in several months (break-up happened about a year ago)...I still occasionally speak to his mother as we were close and she'll ask how I'm doing and she has always had a big mouth...so she takes anything I say to her and tells him when he asks about me...this can be good and bad, but I only tell her good things...

...but whatever I tell her gets to him (and his new wife who she doesn't like) and he hears I'm much better without him which is true (which is the best part) ...and that's the best revenge I've ever gotten and it's not intentional...I only found out recently that she still talks to him about me. And I was never really mean to him for all he put me through. I think most people would have gone nuts...

 

[rob_just_rob]

No, I can't be bothered, usually. And I don't think - being as objective as I can - that I have really been treated all that badly by very many exes.

Although I have successfully wished a couple of people dead, they weren't exes. :biggrin1:

 

[LeeEJ]

But what would ruining him prove? Probably that you are petty, mean-spirited to others even if you're not...after the anger settles down, it's not going to be worth it. If you go through with any kind of revenge, the perceived euphoria/happiness you'll get out of it will fade and the anger and pain is still going to be there.

It's fine to not wish him well...but, showing you're fine without him is the best revenge, trust me. Especially because it's the kind of "revenge" that will actually benefit you. If he at all said to you that you couldn't be fine without him or couldn't do x, y, z with your life, why not prove him wrong?

+1. I was going to say the same thing.

Seeking revenge is stupid, petty, grade-school bullshit. You've got to grow up someday.

Man, I'm glad that my exes haven't been like that. I don't take kindly to petty bullshit.

 

[Skull Mason]

moving on is the best revenge.

 

[King_ding_a_ling]

"Revenge is a dish best served cold."

--Khan from Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan​

Big Bang Theory anyone?

 

[Fleur]

Big Bang Theory anyone?

I <3 that show.

 

[Gillette]

Although I have successfully wished a couple of people dead,...

Teach me how?

 

[Principessa]

moving on is the best revenge.

Actually living well is the best revenge. :wink:

 

[rob_just_rob]

Teach me how?

I can't prove they weren't coincidences. But after it happens more than once, it's at least coincidental.