Do you have an egg to spare?

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by D_Barbi_Queue, Feb 13, 2005.

  1. D_Barbi_Queue

    D_Barbi_Queue Account Disabled

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    Ladies, could you ever consider donating an egg to an unfertile couple?

    It's something I'm actually considering lately. I haven't put much research into it yet to find out the logistics though. I'm still trying to get past the point that I could have a biological son or daughter out there that I'd never meet if I went through with it.
     
  2. InsertHere

    InsertHere New Member

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    I think I would consider it but, like you, I would have to do some research. I believe this kind of donation involves surgery, doesn't it?

    I would be much more willing to do this than to be a birth mother (like Phoebe on Friends) because I think there would be less of an emotional connection to the baby.

    If you do consider it, I would see if you could keep in contact with the couple and the child. Be an "auntie" or something. I think that would make it a lot easier while keeping your biological child in your life. It would also make it a lot easier to break the news to the child when they're old enough to understand.

    My sister had a baby which she then gave up for open adoption, but they're not in contact anymore. I think this will make it a lot more difficult to explain to her (the child) exactly where she came from and why she doesn't look the slightest bit like her siblings!

    I hope that gave you some more things to consider and helped with your decision. You are very generous even to think about it! Good luck
     
  3. wonderland

    wonderland Member

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    The process is difficult because you have to take a lot of hormone shots and the eggs are harvested with the biggest needle u have ever seen. My friend worked in a fertility clinic and was involved in harvesting the eggs. Usually eggs are harvested from women for their own use so they are motivated to go thru the process but from what I have read egg donors make about $2000. It doesn't seem like enough compenstion for what you can go thru physically and emotionally.
     
  4. Pecker

    Pecker Retired Moderator
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    As usual, this morning I was checking the refrigerator for breakfast goodies.

    Eggs were suddenly quite unappetizing for some reason.

    I guess Post Grape Nuts and toast will have to do.
     
  5. D_Barbi_Queue

    D_Barbi_Queue Account Disabled

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    I'm sure that I would have to remain sexually inactive too....unless I want to become pregnant again (which I do, but not right away).

    That would probably be too hard to do.
     
  6. godiluvabig1

    godiluvabig1 New Member

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    I could do it, but would only do it for someone I know...
    But, then again, I have a 2 year old daughter, who I put up for adoption because I was so young... I was 15 when I got pregnant and 16 when I had her (I'm 18 now)...
    and you're right, InsertHere, there is a sort of emotional attachment that complicates things... It wasn't easy, and I have my moments where I cry about it, but over all, I know I did what was best for her, and not to mention the fact that her parents are unable to have children of their own...
    Generally, though, I view this experience as an eye opener, considering the fact that I was being young and stupid (like so many in my generation)... But, then again, I was able to gain more maturity from it as well...
    Fortunately, I get to see her regularly, and I get pictures from her on all the major holidays, so it wasn't a total loss...
     
  7. jonb

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    I've considered donating sperm. Of course, I'm a guy, so we basically have an infinite supply of the little buggers.
     
  8. D_Humper E Bogart

    D_Humper E Bogart New Member

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    I'm tempted, for financial reasons, (heck, I'd be there EVERY day!) But in the UK, they're creating/created laws that mean offspring can track down their fathers.

    Also, there's the whole aspect of being a father.

    Anyway, someone would choose my sperm over thousands of others? How desperate are some people??
     
  9. Imported

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    Sweet Caroline: I'd echo godiluvabig1 on this. I'd consider it for a loved one, but I couldn't accept the risk and interruption of my life for someone I didn't know. This is surgery we're talking about, not a simple donation.

    For me the "biological offspring" doesn't play into it much. I'd guess it would be very, very different from giving up a child that you actually carried and gave birth to. I would think there may be an intellectual "gee wiz, I have a biological kid" factor but I wouldn't expect I'd have the same emotional attachement. Of course, who knows how I'd really react.....

    Carrie
     
  10. jonb

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    Yeah, I got tested once. I'm actually a pretty good candidate for surrogate fatherhood: 120 million per millilitre. That's slightly above even the 1940 average, when sperm count was much higher.

    As for why they allow kids to meet their donors as adults, if they didn't, the risk of inbreeding would be too great.
     
  11. D_Humper E Bogart

    D_Humper E Bogart New Member

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    I'm sure I'd know if I was about to hump my own daughter though?

    I mean, I'd probably go "shit, you inherited your clit off me!"
     
  12. madame_zora

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    I am pretty sure my age would be a deterrant for egg donation now, but had I been approached when I was younger, I would have done it for a friend. I don't know if I could have done it for a stranger, but who knows. I don't think I would have felt much attatchment to the child because for me that happened as a result of my pregnancy and giving birth, which I wouldn't be doing. Texass, I know you'll make the decision that suits you best, if you do decide to go through with it, I'm sure you'll be bringing a great deal of joy into the lives of a childless couple that at least you know WANT to be parents.

    Godiluvabig1, we all make difficult choices when we are young, your generation is no worse than any of the preceeding ones. FWIW, I am proud of you for deciding to have your baby and give it up for adoption to a couple who wanted a baby, it was more than I could do. There is room for all of us to learn and grow, sharing here has been a good part of that process for me so I'm glad you're here too.
     
  13. jonb

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    Yeah, those five-inch clits should give you a clue. LOL Seriously, it gets to be less of a problem after the F1 generation, but you should still watch yourself.
     
  14. godiluvabig1

    godiluvabig1 New Member

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    Thanks, Zora... I appreciate that...
     
  15. Imported

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    NelsonMuntz84: My gf is going to do this for her sister in the next year or so if other treatment etc is unsuccesful. It was quite funny in the sense she was nervous about telling me, but I'd only have been shocked if she'd said no.

    Their hasn't been a huge discussion about it, I think she just wants to do it and let her sister have a baby. It probably helps that neither her or to a much lesser extent, me, think of the baby being her's.

    I dont expect the child will ever be told of it, or it will ever be discussed again after it happens, they are that type of family and personally I dont see the big need for it.

    Godiluvabig1, all anyone can do is put their child before themselves, and thats what you did. Its easy for people to talk the talk, its much different for someone to walk the walk like you have.
     
  16. godiluvabig1

    godiluvabig1 New Member

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    <!--QuoteBegin-NelsonMuntz84
    @Feb 20 2005, 06:46 PM
    Godiluvabig1, all anyone can do is put their child before themselves, and thats what you did. Its easy for people to talk the talk, its much different for someone to walk the walk like you have.
    [post=284756]Quoted post[/post]​
    [/quote]

    Ya know, I was just thinking and realized...
    I&#39;m glad you guys understand the decision I made because a lot of people really don&#39;t... Although I know I did what was right for my daughter (and likely myself in the process), several people I know don&#39;t think it was smart... But then again, they don&#39;t have the ability to "put themselves in my shoes"... like I had mentioned earlier in this thread, it wasn&#39;t an easy thing to do at the time, but now I&#39;m much more open about the whole thing (it helps that I get pix of her and get to see her)... There are times, though, when I feel the pain associated with the decision... but then, it&#39;s not all that bad, cuz I&#39;d hurt way more if I couldn&#39;t have kids like her parents couldn&#39;t... So I understand...
     
  17. D_Humper E Bogart

    D_Humper E Bogart New Member

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    By the F2 point, it&#39;ll be a miracle I&#39;m still alive, I&#39;d have thought.

    <!--QuoteBegin-NelsonMuntz84

    My gf is going to do this for her sister in the next year or so if other treatment etc is unsuccesful. It was quite funny in the sense she was nervous about telling me, but I&#39;d only have been shocked if she&#39;d said no.[/quote]
    I find it very touching that your gf is so dedicated and that you&#39;re behind her all the way. Perhaps in the future, even egg donation wont be neccesary.
     
  18. jonb

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    Yeah, but I meant two children from the same donor. By the time sex with a direct descendant or ancestor is bad, you&#39;ll most likely be dead. Unless it&#39;s a direct male line consisting of a series of Mary-Kay Letourneau-style relationships: Usually, girls menstruate before they&#39;re physically ready for pregnancy.

    Jon (That reminds me: What kind of insult is it to be cuckolded by your wife&#39;s twelve-year-old student?)
     
  19. D_Humper E Bogart

    D_Humper E Bogart New Member

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    Don&#39;t tell me that&#39;s happened to you.
     
  20. jonb

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    No, but that&#39;s what happened to Mr. Letourneau.
     
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