Do You Hold Back Your Sexuality?

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by openmatrix, Jun 23, 2011.

  1. openmatrix

    openmatrix New Member

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    Here's something I noticed on this board. It's exclusively for the women as it's a very psychological and philosophical point, it probably has something to do with cultural standards too.

    I was just reading a couple examples of women "holding back their sexuality" either at the beginning of their relationships or even while the relationship has been going on for a while.
    Why would one do this? I saw some explanations like to "keep the SO feeling comfortable or not to scare him away" but details on that and explanations for reasons why a girl would do this would be interesting and informative. What could one do to reverse this?

    Do you hold back your sexuality from your S/O or fwb?

    To be more specific I don't mean holding back from sex, I mean suppressing the more sexually adventurous side of yourself.
     
    #1 openmatrix, Jun 23, 2011
    Last edited: Jun 23, 2011
  2. B_Hickboy

    B_Hickboy New Member

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    Yes, then i spue it allover her tits and face.
     
  3. MickeyLee

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    holding back? *blink*

    like, nothing that might draw blood on a first date?

    i try to restrict permanent marks until after a relationship (FB and up) has been established :tongue1:
     
  4. ManlyBanisters

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    I'm unclear on what you mean. Do you mean the Women's Issues forum here - it's not exclusively for the women.

    By 'holding back sexuality' do you mean not fucking?

    If you do then no, I don't. I fuck because I love fucking - I would not want to be in a relationship with anyone who couldn't accept that I love to fuck. Luckily HickBoy loves my love of sex and I love his - neither of us held back.

    As for fwbs? What's the fucking point of a fuck buddy you won't fuck? Sheesh!
     
  5. ManlyBanisters

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    He does, you know! It's beautiful :smile:
     
  6. openmatrix

    openmatrix New Member

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    I edited the first post to clear it up. I meant sexually adventurous parts of yourself. I know the specific sub forum is not just for women, but it's a women's issue that I'm interested in a female's perspective in. I can make a good assumption as to the male perspective
     
  7. EllieP

    Staff Member Moderator Gold Member

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    Well, since I'm married I usually hold back my sexuality with just about everyone I meet.

    But when I met my husband, yes, I was cautious about overexposing myself. Of course, there's only so much I can do, since some early man equated boobs with sex, which is another thing beyond my understanding, but anyway here we are.

    I did hold back until our second or third date. I think he got an inkling the second time we went out, and I guess I was testing the waters. He's a little bit older than me, so I assumed wiser, too (still do, Darling), so I sure didn't want to a) think I was a slut or b) think that sex was the only thing I was thinking about. Of course, I realize now that either would have made him happy.

    Don't even know if this is remotely close to what you were looking for but it's out there anyway.
     
  8. ManofThunder

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    I like your definition of sexuality. :biggrin1:

    I don't hold anything back (unless you use HickBoy's definition) with a lover/partner, what's the point? If I'm sleeping with someone, I'm already at least friends with her and feel no need to hide my true-self. If it's a 'non-sexual' friend I won't go into great detail or make a point of discussing sex, but won't hide from it either.
     
  9. B_Hickboy

    B_Hickboy New Member

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    I prize directness and openness in all their forms, as long as they manifest in a balanced fashion.

    That said, Hickboy is not to be taken as a balanced entity. Anybody who responds to him as such is a fucking stoned-out idiot.
     
  10. HiddenLacey

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    There are parts of myself that I have kind of built walls around and I'm not forth coming with information like I should be in real life. If I were having sex with someone and I was asked about any of these things, I would probably do my best to be as truthful as possible about the subject, but I doubt I would volunteer the information unless asked. I don't intentionally try to hide things, it's more that I'm unsure how to broach the subject.
     
    #10 HiddenLacey, Jun 23, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 23, 2011
  11. redbear52

    redbear52 New Member

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    I knew a couple of girls who at first seemed to be very shy and retiring whom I later found to be very sexually experienced and sexually adventurous.

    I rather suspect that some women are reluctant to immediately disclose the more sexually adventurous aspects of their character out of concern that they would be taken to be a slut or a pervert.

    Men, on the other hand, have a tendency to take it for granted that most women are going to assume that they are a slut and/or a pervert, so they don't have such scruples.
     
  12. The Dragon

    The Dragon New Member

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    I ease into filth.
    I have very few hard limits when it comes to sexual expression and I can flat out scare the average straight vanilla soul.

    Taking a slowly slowly approach helps to find their limits..after all you can't unring a bell.
     
  13. dolfette

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    some scenes are great with one guy and suck balls with another.
    why would i leap straight into what could end up relationship ruiningly horrible?
    i wait to find out slowly what works with each guy.
     
  14. The Dragon

    The Dragon New Member

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    Exactly right!

    Walking out of the bathroom wearing my biggest strapon and toting a 4ft signal whip possibly won't go down well with a casual Friday night pick up from the local pub.:biggrin1:
     
  15. ManofThunder

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    Sounds good to me! :eek: (Just as long as I'm using the whip and get to use my built-in strap-on.) :tongue: :rolleyes:
     
  16. The Dragon

    The Dragon New Member

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    Silly Boy. :wink:

    Just for your sake..(because I like you so much) I'll leave the brass knuckle dusters and the urethral sounds in the cupboard!:biggrin1:
     
  17. ManofThunder

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    Ahh, cool. Thanks, I think. That's a very kinky cupboard you have! Does it lead to a sexual Narnia? (I like you too! :tongue:)
     
  18. The Dragon

    The Dragon New Member

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    God gets mentioned a lot during the times I don't put a gag on the sub so I guess so!:biggrin1:
     
  19. ManofThunder

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    You should be my sub - the tables need to be turned! :biggrin1: :rolleyes:
     
  20. The Dragon

    The Dragon New Member

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    Silly Boy! :wink:
     
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