I'd say it's for each individual couple to agree upon together. My dude knows to wake me first. I also know to wake him first. Cheek kissing is okay. Hugging is okay. I think putting my cold hands on his warm body is fine. I haven't asked, but he hasn't objected. If someone does something to me I haven't asked them not to do, I make sure the boundary becomes clear, and expect them not to deliver a repeat performance. I might not like what has happened, but if I liked them enough to share a bed in the first place, or give a key to my house, then I'm not going to hold it against them. I would assume they meant well.