Do you think that dating is harder now than it used to be?

[Crimsonlurker]

The birth rate of industrialized nations is going to decline rapidly because of mass internet use, people just don't know how to actually connect with others in the real world. Some on here say it is easier to meet people due to the internet, I say that is bogus because if you ever look at online dating sites the "about me" sections are filled with a checklist of demands for a potential partner. I think the other issue, as someone has mentioned on here, is that people are constantly looking for something better, there isn't anything necessarily wrong with that but when you've found a great guy or girl you connect with and you are still looking.....something is wrong.

In a way I think this is kind of a good thing that these people will straggle to ever find meaningful relationships, because they are toxic and selfish individuals with nothing to offer. Try to imagine these types of people raising children, that is a scary thought to say the least. I actually had a conversation about online dating with a class mate a couple weeks about this. He was saying how he was having a hard time finding a girl who was single, most quality females are always in relationships, and some other guy suggested trying online dating sites. I told him to not waste his time on there as practically every woman had the check list of demands without having anything to offer besides her vagina, most of them were also not very attractive physically and many were single moms.

From a man's perspective, we live in a bad time due to this feminist society we live in but these issues have a negative impact on both genders, and what you are discussing is an example of this.

You mean from one lonely man's opinion? Yeah feminism didn't and doesn't have that much of a negative impact. Sure, some women do take it too far but thats because men have been in power since the beginning and have used that power to abuse women for about the same amount of time in many many different ways. I said in my previous post that ignorance is bliss. And it is. A lot of men are unhappy now because they have to respect women. Women will not longer just submit to some guy just because he's a guy. That's i'm guessing why you're unhappy.

Women did have less rights back in the day. Thats why things were happier for men. They had less to do and less to think about. Now men have to be considerate and respectful of women. Which burns some guys up from the inside out. Why? They feel they own the world. They feel that women shouldn't have requirements and don't have anything else to offer but pussy. These men dream of the old days because they think they would have had it easier. Truth is they probably would have found who they thought was the one but were deeply mistaken because she couldn't fully express who she was.

Theres just more competition now. Thats it. Women and feminism didn't make dating difficult for anyone. No, variety did that.you have and would treat a woman. Seriously, why is the concept of respect so hard for most guys? Sure, you may not always get that respect back but trying to blame a group for your insecurities will only make your problems worse.

 

[sangheili90]

If you choose to marry a woman who likes money, but hates working, that is entirely your choice. Many men choose to do that because they want all of the control in the relationship.

So it is always the man's fault lol, you realize that this response of yours is exactly what I am talking about with how men are afraid of getting married. Fuck, maybe I was on to something about not getting involved with women, this is a horrifying thought. Stop trying to put a bad label on all men because you got involved with the wrong one and paying the price for it, this is ridiculous. There are a lot of great men out there and they do not deserve this type of treatment.

This is why I made a vow to myself to marry someone who comes from a background where family values are honored and respected, instead of getting involved with a woman who comes from a place where this type of thinking is acceptable.

 

[sangheili90]

You mean from one lonely man's opinion? Yeah feminism didn't and doesn't have that much of a negative impact. Sure, some women do take it too far but thats because men have been in power since the beginning and have used that power to abuse women for about the same amount of time in many many different ways. I said in my previous post that ignorance is bliss. And it is. A lot of men are unhappy now because they have to respect women. Women will not longer just submit to some guy just because he's a guy. That's i'm guessing why you're unhappy.

Women did have less rights back in the day. Thats why things were happier for men. They had less to do and less to think about. Now men have to be considerate and respectful of women. Which burns some guys up from the inside out. Why? They feel they own the world. They feel that women shouldn't have requirements and don't have anything else to offer but pussy. These men dream of the old days because they think they would have had it easier. Truth is they probably would have found who they thought was the one but were deeply mistaken because she couldn't fully express who she was.

Theres just more competition now. Thats it. Women and feminism didn't make dating difficult for anyone. No, variety did that.you have and would treat a woman. Seriously, why is the concept of respect so hard for most guys? Sure, you may not always get that respect back but trying to blame a group for your insecurities will only make your problems worse.

You obviously don't get what I was saying, read my follow up posts.

 

[rtg]

So it is always the man's fault lol, you realize that this response of yours is exactly what I am talking about with how men are afraid of getting married. Fuck, maybe I was on to something about not getting involved with women, this is a horrifying thought. Stop trying to put a bad label on all men because you got involved with the wrong one and paying the price for it, this is ridiculous. There are a lot of great men out there and they do not deserve this type of treatment.

This is why I made a vow to myself to marry someone who comes from a background where family values are honored and respected, instead of getting involved with a woman who comes from a place where this type of thinking is acceptable.

I think she was just referring to the whole prenup thing... I don't think she was saying that all men are like that.

If you are afraid of getting married because a woman will take all your money and screw you over, then that's probably something you need to deal with before you enter into a relationship.

 

[Crimsonlurker]

You just summed it up in your post, people not getting married and women being single mothers is a result of the negative impact feminism has had. From a man's stand point, other guys of my generation are hesitant to ever consider getting married because they know if they get divorced, which is very likely to happen, they will get gutted like a fish. When children are involved, divorce courts favor women overwhelmingly over men. Men are afraid of approaching and chasing women because they are afraid of getting in trouble for sexual harassment, this is an actual offense in Sweden btw.

I realize there are a lot of dead beat guys out there, but there are a lot of very high quality men who will never consider marriage out of fear of what I mentioned. Speaking for myself, I have far too much going for me to not take these things into consideration and how they will affect my life, which is actually rather sad since I should be getting married and having a lot of children.

Yeah what you've seen in the courts is a reaction to men leaving their wives without a penny. Deserting them in their time of need like..."manly men"? It's funny how that whole "the man brings up the blah blah" bullshit goes out the window when you are no longer attracted to someone. And sure, there are gold diggers out there but had men not sexismed all over women with their sentiments about being the better gender and i might add screwed women out of rights....left and right it wouldn't have gotten to that point. Also that had nothing to do with feminism.

I'm sorry but you don't speak for all men. I would venture a guess that actual totals laugh in the face of what you just said. Once again sure, there may be a number of men hesitant but pretty sure it isn't the number you're implying. Not to mention you're assuming about the why to a very large extent. There are a million reasons people do or don't do things. So far you're just trying to point a very large finger at feminism because you were told to.

You say you realize but you still think there are more good guys than dead beat ones. I'm guessing thats because you think dead beat only means broke. No, there are guys out there who would happily hide the fact they were cheating on their wife with another guy. While continuously telling the world not only that their straight but go after other people they think are cheating. There are guys out there who only marry so they'll have someone to physically and psychologically abuse. And then there are guys who only marry for the image. Using their wife to improve their careers.

 

[950483]

So it is always the man's fault lol, you realize that this response of yours is exactly what I am talking about with how men are afraid of getting married. Fuck, maybe I was on to something about not getting involved with women, this is a horrifying thought. Stop trying to put a bad label on all men because you got involved with the wrong one and paying the price for it, this is ridiculous. There are a lot of great men out there and they do not deserve this type of treatment.

This is why I made a vow to myself to marry someone who comes from a background where family values are honored and respected, instead of getting involved with a woman who comes from a place where this type of thinking is acceptable.

Being all whiney and victimized doesn't win the argument unfortunately. Neither does denigrating me or insinuating anything about my background.

I agree that there are a lot of great men out there, and they are the ones that would appreciate me having my autonomy and doing my best to pay my own way. I would only choose to be in a relationship with an equal; I am not a chattel or a pet.

 

[EllieP]

I'm just going to jump in and answer the original question: yes, I believe it is harder now. I was married at 18, divorced at 20 and didn't date for a couple of years. This was before everyone was so connected.

If I were thrown back into the dating pool now I think I'd jump out, towel off and grab an umbrella drink to enjoy alone under the umbrella. All of this swipe right crap befuddles an old fogey like me. I just don't get it.

I feel like people have to do a lot more work to attempt a relationship now. It makes me tired just thinking about it.

 

[sangheili90]

I think she was just referring to the whole prenup thing... I don't think she was saying that all men are like that.

If you are afraid of getting married because a woman will take all your money and screw you over, then that's probably something you need to deal with before you enter into a relationship.

Which is why I would get a prenuptial before getting married, as a type of insurance policy. If I get married and it ends in divorce, and lets theorize that there are no kids involved, the woman may potentially be entitled to half of everything I own. I'm 26 and financially in an awesome position which has allowed me to have a ridiculous degree of flexibility with my life, I've posted about this in another thread. I could marry a woman who at the time may be an awesome fit for me, we get a long and what not....but I'm intelligent enough to realize that things and people change. She doesn't have to be a conniving snake from the start who has been secretly plotting this for years, in this case it is not really anyone's fault but it is not fair to the man to have to forgo half of everything. I have a lot to lose, if I was dirt poor it would be a different story.

 

[sangheili90]

Being all whiney and victimized doesn't win the argument unfortunately. Neither does denigrating me or insinuating anything about my background.

I agree that there are a lot of great men out there, and they are the ones that would appreciate me having my autonomy and doing my best to pay my own way. I would only choose to be in a relationship with an equal; I am not a chattel or a pet.

No one cares that you can support your kid on your own, stop acting like it means you should be appreciated for being able to do this. Being a single mother, meaning there is literally no father in the life of the child at all, is not something to be proud of, society has unfortunately deemed it acceptable when it should be the exact opposite.

 

[someperson]

Being all whiney and victimized doesn't win the argument unfortunately. Neither does denigrating me or insinuating anything about my background.

I agree that there are a lot of great men out there, and they are the ones that would appreciate me having my autonomy and doing my best to pay my own way. I would only choose to be in a relationship with an equal; I am not a chattel or a pet.

that is why most women hate him cant get laid lol

 

[sangheili90]

@Crimsonlurker

I'll try to do my best to explain this to someone who doesn't grasp where I am going with this.

I'm 26 years old and have been blessed with an awesome life that very few will ever enjoy. I purchase and renovate homes for either reselling or for the purpose of turning them into rental properties and because of this have enjoyed a great amount of financial success while also doing something that I enjoy. Due to this success, I am able to enjoy a ridiculous degree of flexibility in my life, I spend the summer months living in MA and the rest of the year in AZ. This very summer I spent 2 months In MA renovating a future rental property and had an awesome time. I'm also beginning my training this fall to compete in the multi events in track and field (Decathlon, Heptathlon etc.) and able to pursue this while also going to school full time without having to work. However, the major issue is that my time pursuing such things has not allowed much opportunity to meet young women who I would be interested in, and because of this I am unhappy with my relationship status.

In regards to positive qualities I can make a list for you

- 6'4"
- Very good looking
- Fit and healthy
- Don't drink, smoke or do drugs
- Very high IQ
- Supportive of people I know, I always help them without asking for anything return.
- Have a canine companion
- Vegetarian, which is generally a sign that one has a higher degree of empathy.

As for what I am looking for in regards to a relationship. I want to get married and have children, by the time this happens I'll be in an even better position financially where I can easily provide for them. I want my wife to be a stay at home mom, which is one of the most respectable professions a woman can have, and because of my financial independence I'll be able to be there for my family, meaning I wont be at the office 24/7. So, I'm a traditional family man who wants a traditional and feminine wife to provide for, if this sounds like abuse or not good enough than something is seriously fucking wrong.

So, I have a lot to offer and I have a lot to lose if I get a divorce, which is more likely to happen than survive if I marry a typical spoiled rotten western female.

 

[sangheili90]

I'm just going to jump in and answer the original question: yes, I believe it is harder now. I was married at 18, divorced at 20 and didn't date for a couple of years. This was before everyone was so connected.

If I were thrown back into the dating pool now I think I'd jump out, towel off and grab an umbrella drink to enjoy alone under the umbrella. All of this swipe right crap befuddles an old fogey like me. I just don't get it.

I feel like people have to do a lot more work to attempt a relationship now. It makes me tired just thinking about it.

Tinder absolutely disgusts me, just a monument to how failed my generation is as a whole.

 

[rtg]

@Crimsonlurker

I'll try to do my best to explain this to someone who doesn't grasp where I am going with this.

I'm 26 years old and have been blessed with an awesome life that very few will ever enjoy. I purchase and renovate homes for either reselling or for the purpose of turning them into rental properties and because of this have enjoyed a great amount of financial success while also doing something that I enjoy. Due to this success, I am able to enjoy a ridiculous degree of flexibility in my life, I spend the summer months living in MA and the rest of the year in AZ. This very summer I spent 2 months In MA renovating a future rental property and had an awesome time. I'm also beginning my training this fall to compete in the multi events in track and field (Decathlon, Heptathlon etc.) and able to pursue this while also going to school full time without having to work. However, the major issue is that my time pursuing such things has not allowed much opportunity to meet young women who I would be interested in, and because of this I am unhappy with my relationship status.

In regards to positive qualities I can make a list for you

- 6'4"
- Very good looking
- Fit and healthy
- Don't drink, smoke or do drugs
- Very high IQ
- Supportive of people I know, I always help them without asking for anything return.
- Have a canine companion
- Vegetarian, which is generally a sign that one has a higher degree of empathy.

As for what I am looking for in regards to a relationship. I want to get married and have children, by the time this happens I'll be in an even better position financially where I can easily provide for them. I want my wife to be a stay at home mom, which is one of the most respectable professions a woman can have, and because of my financial independence I'll be able to be there for my family, meaning I wont be at the office 24/7. So, I'm a traditional family man who wants a traditional and feminine wife to provide for, if this sounds like abuse or not good enough than something is seriously fucking wrong.

So, I have a lot to offer and I have a lot to lose if I get a divorce, which is more likely to happen than survive if I marry a typical spoiled rotten western female.

Ok but why would you want a prenup if you don't want your wife to work? If you are the only one allowed to work and bring home the bacon, and if things don't work out and she doesn't get a penny... Then what is she supposed to live on? If she hadn't been working it would probably then also be hard for her to get a job and she may have lost whatever skills she previously had. Then you leave the marriage with all your money, and she leaves with nothing?

Why wouldn't you support a woman wanting her own career and both of you can raise the children together... As equals?

 

[sangheili90]

Ok but why would you want a prenup if you don't want your wife to work? If you are the only one allowed to work and bring home the bacon, and if things don't work out and she doesn't get a penny... Then what is she supposed to live on? If she hadn't been working it would probably then also be hard for her to get a job and she may have lost whatever skills she previously had. Then you leave the marriage with all your money, and she leaves with nothing?

Why wouldn't you support a woman wanting her own career and both of you can raise the children together... As equals?

If we have children then I would happily support them, but I would use the prenup agreement as a back up in case the marriage turns south shortly after it began and before any children are involved. I don't want someone to marry me and then ditch me for money, there is nothing wrong with me taking some precautions for my own benefit.

She is my equal, I support the family financially and she has the very important task of raising and caring for the children. I know society try's to make it out like being a care taker is a bad thing, but it is one of the most important roles a woman can have, human societies thrived off of this for centuries and biologically this is the nature of things. There are studies that show traditional families are far happier and more likely to survive compared to more modern family units, where both parents work, and single family households.

 

[Crimsonlurker]

@Crimsonlurker

I'll try to do my best to explain this to someone who doesn't grasp where I am going with this.

I'm 26 years old and have been blessed with an awesome life that very few will ever enjoy. I purchase and renovate homes for either reselling or for the purpose of turning them into rental properties and because of this have enjoyed a great amount of financial success while also doing something that I enjoy. Due to this success, I am able to enjoy a ridiculous degree of flexibility in my life, I spend the summer months living in MA and the rest of the year in AZ. This very summer I spent 2 months In MA renovating a future rental property and had an awesome time. I'm also beginning my training this fall to compete in the multi events in track and field (Decathlon, Heptathlon etc.) and able to pursue this while also going to school full time without having to work. However, the major issue is that my time pursuing such things has not allowed much opportunity to meet young women who I would be interested in, and because of this I am unhappy with my relationship status.

In regards to positive qualities I can make a list for you

- 6'4"
- Very good looking
- Fit and healthy
- Don't drink, smoke or do drugs
- Very high IQ
- Supportive of people I know, I always help them without asking for anything return.
- Have a canine companion
- Vegetarian, which is generally a sign that one has a higher degree of empathy.

As for what I am looking for in regards to a relationship. I want to get married and have children, by the time this happens I'll be in an even better position financially where I can easily provide for them. I want my wife to be a stay at home mom, which is one of the most respectable professions a woman can have, and because of my financial independence I'll be able to be there for my family, meaning I wont be at the office 24/7. So, I'm a traditional family man who wants a traditional and feminine wife to provide for, if this sounds like abuse or not good enough than something is seriously fucking wrong.

So, I have a lot to offer and I have a lot to lose if I get a divorce, which is more likely to happen than survive if I marry a typical spoiled rotten western female.

rtg already elaborated on a lot. And she's spot on. Trust me you aren't as smart as you think you are. Also, there isn't much to grasp either. Of course though i'm thinking maybe i should give a bit of this a rest for now. I'm thinking the reasons why you are and could be wrong shouldn't come from me. I mean if you insist sure but for now maybe i shouldn't. Once again though etg has an insanely valid point. Something i've seen happen countless times.

 

[sangheili90]

@rtg

I meant to say single parent households.

If I'm still in the same boat as I am now when I'm married than it would be awesome to have my wife work beside me, I forgot to mention that. However, raising children takes a lot of time when they are me when they are younger and I think it would be unfair to expect her to do both this and help me. I want her to also have a life outside of the family and be able to do the things she enjoys, so if a nanny helps her with this than I'd pay for that.

 

[sangheili90]

rtg already elaborated on a lot. And she's spot on. Trust me you aren't as smart as you think you are. Also, there isn't much to grasp either. Of course though i'm thinking maybe i should give a bit of this a rest for now. I'm thinking the reasons why you are and could be wrong shouldn't come from me. I mean if you insist sure but for now maybe i shouldn't. Once again though etg has an insanely valid point. Something i've seen happen countless times.

Good riddance loser, I'm a good guy and have way more to offer than you ever will.

 

[sangheili90]

@rtg I'm open to a discussion with you about this, as you are being completely fair and respectful with your questions. Jealous losers like @Crimsonlurker will just be put on my ignore list, I'll let him think upstanding guys like me who want to be providers are somehow abusive assholes.

 

[Crimsonlurker]

Good riddance loser, I'm a good guy and have way more to offer than you ever will.

Oh really Mr "who wants to see my face because i'm in desperate need for attention". Seriously, you listed all that on a site about big dicks because your feelwings were hurt. Yes, people thought you were a good guy until you pulled this and other shit. I would venture a guess at them slowly beginning to understand exactly the type of guy you are. You brag about the things you may or may not have because deep down you know you have nothing else. You don't have a good personality, charm, knowledge or anything else that doesn't include material things. You my friend have a paper penis and would love to swing that puppy around and net all the ladies. For you it isn't about making a connection with someone because you don't know how. That part of you is and has been stunted for years. I'm guessing the better part of your life.

To you women are yet another material thing. Some princess doll you can hold in your little castle for safety. Not their safety mind you, yours. The second you stepped foot in the politics section i knew exactly who you were and why. This just further confirms it. Put it like this. You are two relationships away from a red pill group. Why? Your emotions. Guys like you never even attempted to deal with them. Never attempt to understand whats going through someone elses head. Everyone and everything in your world is about ownership, control or manliness. Which in turn makes you very easily understandable.

Just so you know i tried to back off because i knew your feelings were hurt. Knew you were gonna try to piss all over the thread in an attempt to mark your territory. Wanted to avoid having to embarrass you. So how about this. How about you just cut the act and go into how women hurt you already. And how that justifies your actions. You'll get there anyway. Why wait. Oh and good luck dating. Most women will see through you. They aren't as stupid as you think they are.

 

[Crimsonlurker]

@rtg I'm open to a discussion with you about this, as you are being completely fair and respectful with your questions. Jealous losers like @Crimsonlurker will just be put on my ignore list, I'll let him think upstanding guys like me who want to be providers are somehow abusive assholes.

Seriously, jealous of what? You just made a thread about dating entirely about you like a five year old in a candy store who didn't get what he wanted. What exactly would there be to be jealous of? The ladies of the site (and the guys) can clearly see that you were offended by even the chance of being wrong or not what you said. You shot first and horribly i might add. And no you're following it up by running with your tail between your legs in a thread that wasn't even about you to begin with. So what exactly do i have to be jealous about. You could have all the money in the world along with the best body in the world and still have had people see who you really are by way of your actions. I'm sorry buddy. All you're trying to do is put lipstick on a pig.

Really dude. The least you could do after having started an internet fight is...stick around. Running off while nan nan a boo booing the person you insulted looks exactly how it sounds. Ok back to the topic.....

...It's abusive because you want to cut of a woman's ability to do or go anywhere. And then you want to rail against her being able to recup any of her loses should you act like an immature bag of playdoh. Which you've already proven you would totes do. That in a nutshell is you attempting to lure women into a situation they can't get out of. Sure, there are women out there who want that sort of thing but the majority do not. And they do not want that because if a guy were to in any way shape or form did slide towards being abusive....theres no way out of it. To be fair there are programs out there to help women in situations like that but they're few and far between. Mainly because guys with the same ideology attempt to cut those programs funding. Leaving those women without a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of.

Which once again is why divorce blah blah blah. It's a reaction to men trying to and most times successfully getting away with harming women. And now the actual insults. You sad poor excuse for semen. So yeah not jealous in the least. If anything i feel bad for you. Hence why i hesitated to engage you. You worthless piece of steamy cow dung.