Do you think the older you get the more open you are to sexual experiementation?

earllogjam

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Hot, thin, perky tits? Geez, picky much? I'm no expert in picking up nymphs. Being a nymph myself has not helped me identify them myself. You might be on your own there, my friend.

Relationship history questions? Be honest, just leave out the gender portion. Might not even come up. Any ONS I've had, I couldn't care less about his relationship history - I wanted him naked, and I wanted him naked NOW!

As to your looks? Yes, I think you're very good looking. And that is a truly honest answer. I haven't seen you from the neck down - perhaps it goes all pear shaped (maybe even literally :eek:). But I also think you're a great person - funny, smart & thoughtful. Plus, you're sort of Canadian - that has endeared you to me forevah!

See I don't even know that thin with perky tits are a rarity in the straight world. :confused: God, I feel like the 40 yr old virgin.

Are there many good looking women who actually welcome and solicit ONS?
Say at hotel bars and such? I don't know the first thing about picking up chicks.

I have been cruised by women while eating alone at a cafe or browsing at a bookstore and it makes me very uncomfortable but I know I can pass as a straight guy. But how do you know if a woman is just looking for NSTA sex without being rude and asking her? In the gay world 99% of the cruising is for sex so it's a no brainer. Women are so hard to read for me.

I'm not pear shaped or fat but would say I'm on the stocky side, def not lean and trim. I fit into the muscle bears category in the gay world. I'm hairy. Lot's of guys think it's hot but not sure women would.

Thanks for saying I'm attractive Femme. Never seen a pic of you but you sure have a wonderful personality. Must be the Canadian in you. lol.



Yes, I think you are a very handsome man. Truly. Just looking again at the pic you posted, and oh, my God yes. You are. If you like, I'll enumerate the reasons why I think so.....

As far as the questions and whatnot. I sincerely doubt it will come up. Most women, if they're looking for NSA sex/one night stands, it won't even come up. I'd say, try a club or a bar. Just be yourself, and you'll do fine.

Nah, please don't enumerate. I feel uncomfortable with the sexual attention my pic gets as it is. Not very good at taking compliments. But thanks nonetheless. Not sure straight women have the same tastes as gay guys, anyways.:redface:
 

Drifterwood

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There is a generalised pattern (obviously not universal) for your standard straight couple. Sexual monogamy at the beginning of a relationship to bond and show commitment, genetic monogamy to have kids that are your own and to help to raise them, and then after this the bets can come off a bit.

The liberation of the last fifty years has made experimentation far more safe and acceptable before the settle down relationship and many sexologists feel that this is also why so many more marriages now are ended within a few years with or without kids.
 

mickstl

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And I am NOT that adorable. :mad:

:tongue:

Been out of town for a few days w/spotty internet access...and see what I miss.

I think you are. That whole very hairy thing thing mentioned later piqued my interest as well...

Do you and the hubby have the kind of relationship where something like this would work? I don't think you'll find you were missing anything though -- you've done it w/women before. Whatever made you focus on men is still there.
 

earllogjam

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:tongue:

Been out of town for a few days w/spotty internet access...and see what I miss.

I think you are. That whole very hairy thing thing mentioned later piqued my interest as well...

Do you and the hubby have the kind of relationship where something like this would work? I don't think you'll find you were missing anything though -- you've done it w/women before. Whatever made you focus on men is still there.

I don't think sex and love are mutually inclusive - that you can sex with someone you aren't in love with or will never love is OK with me. It's been so long since I was with a woman and it was a pleasurable experience makes me want to experience it again. It just seems so much more complicated and harder to get now than in college. lol.
 

Smaccoms

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Ok you do understand that this is for people who are older, not for you

So you agreed with someone who is 28 and is still learning. You can fuck right off, what a bitchy response

I'm with you on both these accounts, although I'm only 22. I must say I am really looking forward to aging. I think sex and sexuality should always have a positive influence on your life, never a neutral or negative one. Naturally, one's age has an influence on this kind of thing. I am excited for my generation to age because of our unique experiences in this day and age. I have to wonder how I'll be having sex in my thirties. I'm already looking forward to more experimentation once I move to San Francisco (it's going to happen).

I had girlfriends in college and enjoyed fucking them. Nothing quite enjoyable as ejaculating into a nice tight pussy. Looking back though it was clumsy sex. My problem is that its been over 20 years since I've been with a woman. Not sure what exactly to do. I don't think my heart or libido would be 100% into it either. I am curious though. It would have to be pure NSTA sex.

I think it's more likely that the woman would say "meh" or "ick". lol.

And I am NOT that adorable. :mad:

I am curious myself. I think it would be fun, a new and different experience. I like being adventurous, and I like the experience we gain (as humans) from that kind of attitude!

Dude out of all the photos I've seen on this site, yours is the MOST adorable!
 

dolfette

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lol, how transparent!

in my youth i tried group sex, public sex, open relationships, sex & blood, gay sex, anal sex, bondage, sex & drugs, and rock & roll... all manner of stuff. perhaps people who were open and experimental when they were young become less so, having already tried so much shit and figured out which of it isn't worth repeating. and perhaps people who were less adventurous become more relaxed and confident to try new things.

a person can have tried pretty much everything that's legal by the time they're 19 and settled into only wanting to do the things they like by 22. it's more about experiences than years. a 70y/o virgin wouldn't automatically have a more valid POV than an experienced teen.

and anyone who thinks i should do shit i don't like can still fuck right off.
 

Solvejg

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lol, how transparent!

in my youth i tried group sex, public sex, open relationships, sex & blood, gay sex, anal sex, bondage, sex & drugs, and rock & roll... all manner of stuff. perhaps people who were open and experimental when they were young become less so, having already tried so much shit and figured out which of it isn't worth repeating. and perhaps people who were less adventurous become more relaxed and confident to try new things.

a person can have tried pretty much everything that's legal by the time they're 19 and settled into only wanting to do the things they like by 22. it's more about experiences than years. a 70y/o virgin wouldn't automatically have a more valid POV than an experienced teen.

and anyone who thinks i should do shit i don't like can still fuck right off.

^^^^^
This.
 

Smaccoms

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lol, how transparent!

in my youth i tried group sex, public sex, open relationships, sex & blood, gay sex, anal sex, bondage, sex & drugs, and rock & roll... all manner of stuff. perhaps people who were open and experimental when they were young become less so, having already tried so much shit and figured out which of it isn't worth repeating. and perhaps people who were less adventurous become more relaxed and confident to try new things.

a person can have tried pretty much everything that's legal by the time they're 19 and settled into only wanting to do the things they like by 22. it's more about experiences than years. a 70y/o virgin wouldn't automatically have a more valid POV than an experienced teen.

and anyone who thinks i should do shit i don't like can still fuck right off.

Well this is part of the point, isn't? Not everyone is afforded the same experiences during their lifetimes. Personally, I did not have access to these kind of experiences growing up in the environment in which I did. I took advantage of what sexual opportunities I could, however.
Another strain of thought under this topic is that age influences one's sexuality. Your opinion (over the years) has clearly intensified to an extreme point. Progress suddenly doesn't cease because "there is no more progress to be made". You cannot stop learning because "you've learned everything there is to learn". Your position appears stagnant and foolish with what you have presented thus far (imo).

Do you honestly believe sexuality ceases to progress, grow, and change simply because you've participated in a particular number/variety of experiences?
 

dolfette

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it may be foolish in your opinion, but perhaps sex and sexuality are a hell of a lot more important to you than they are to me. i have no interest in developing my sexuality at this point. there are far more interesting and important things! sex being high priority for you does not mean it is/should be so for everyone else.

nope, i'm perfectly happy to settle into something comfortable or settle for nothing at all. either is ok with me. i'll save the expanding and discovery for aspects of my life which inspire excitement and aspiration.

younger me thought that there might be a thrill somewhere, seeing as society insisted it must be so. older me knows that there are all shades of sexuality in the world and that not being a very sexual person is every bit as valid as being highly sexual.

foolish would be doing it because people like yourself tell me it's the best way to be. it's not. it's just a way to be.

i see your values, i respect your values, i reject your values.
 

Smaccoms

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There is more to sexuality than sex. In fact, a lot of people partake in sexual acts much more often than they realize. Attraction takes many platonic forms, which is why it's a part of your life overall. This is why I believe ceasing to understand one's sexuality as it changes over time is to cease to understand yourself and how you relate to the others around you. That cannot a good thing.
IN summary:
Due to the fact sexuality is just as much platonic as it is sexual, it is an important aspect of our self-identities; it remains a part of our lives even if we cease to have sex.
 

dolfette

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who says a person ceases to understand themselves just because they stop experimenting? you seem to look down on people who find that aspect of themselves less important than you do, assuming a lack of emotional intelligence and self awareness.
 

aninnymouse

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I think the point the both of you are trying to make is that sexuality, and sexual experience, does exist on a continuum. Where you are on that continuum, and what you are willing to do is a very personal thing.

That's why I think anyone, from barest age of majority, to 70+ years of age has a right to answer the question.

Here's a question, smaccoms; You're 22 now; but say if your first sexual experience was on your 18th birthday, and you've had a few different experiences over the past 4 years, or so....wouldn't that mean that you're sexually a different person from when you've had that first experience?

I think you have to apply it on a case by case basis....
 

Smaccoms

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@dolfette My point was that sexuality is much more than sex. It grows, changes, and has impacts on your life in more ways that just sexual. It can influence who we end up in a conversation with when at a co-worker's party for example and end up making a coffee date afterward to get to know each other (as friends). Our sexuality is embedded in our lives one way or another. Being aware of that so you can manipulate toward your own goals I think is quite healthy.
For example, if I am aware of the fact the power straight men posses culturally over gay men, I can understand why I might be sub-consciously attracted toward those straight men who take advantage of it. I can therefore steer myself somewhat around that obstacle in terms of judging people's character.

@aninnymouse It's funny because the criteria you give very closely match my experiences. I lsot my virginity 3-4 months after I turned 18. Since then, I have guestimated to have had 20-30 partners and having anal intercourse 30-40 times. My sexuality most certainly is different now than it was when I first lost my virginity. Thus far, I have come to understand one's sexuality to have three independent categories. They have a dynamic interplay I think to help create the over sexual identity in each individual. They are as follows:

Orientation: psychological portion
Behavior: social portion
Practices: archives

What do you think?
 

dolfette

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@dolfette My point was that sexuality is much more than sex. It grows, changes, and has impacts on your life in more ways that just sexual. It can influence who we end up in a conversation with when at a co-worker's party for example and end up making a coffee date afterward to get to know each other (as friends). Our sexuality is embedded in our lives one way or another. Being aware of that so you can manipulate toward your own goals I think is quite healthy.
For example, if I am aware of the fact the power straight men posses culturally over gay men, I can understand why I might be sub-consciously attracted toward those straight men who take advantage of it. I can therefore steer myself somewhat around that obstacle in terms of judging people's character.
you make a great many assumptions there...
mainly that i'm a complete moron who does not know the obvious.

just because a person does not agree with your POV, does not mean they must not understand your POV. a person can understand and still not agree.

these examples you list, despite most not applying to my day to day life, are nothing to do with the OP's question which i answered.

is my self awareness reduced by choosing not to be experimental in bed? no.

are my daily interactions affected by my choice not to be experimental in bed? no.

is my awareness of social interactions reduced by my choice not to be experimental in bed? no.

but perhaps you may convince me that they are if you can make your tone just a tiny bit more patronising.
 
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in my youth i tried group sex, public sex, open relationships, sex & blood, gay sex, anal sex, bondage, sex & drugs, and rock & roll... all manner of stuff. perhaps people who were open and experimental when they were young become less so, having already tried so much shit and figured out which of it isn't worth repeating. and perhaps people who were less adventurous become more relaxed and confident to try new things.

a person can have tried pretty much everything that's legal by the time they're 19 and settled into only wanting to do the things they like by 22. it's more about experiences than years. a 70y/o virgin wouldn't automatically have a more valid POV than an experienced teen.

All of that. I've done an awful lot of experimenting already. It makes me more likely to want to just keep doing the things I've discovered I liked. And it gives me a fair idea of things that I won't like. I'm roughly in the middle because there is quite a quantity of things I do want to try, though.