Does "friend" status on this site mean anything to you?

Discussion in 'Et Cetera, Et Cetera' started by Calboner, Feb 10, 2010.

  1. Calboner

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    When this site first added the "friend" function (much to my annoyance), I found myself having to deal with requests from members of the site with whom I had nothing whatever to do. To me, "friend" status would have to indicate someone with whom I had at least had a friendly exchange of private messages. So I made it my policy to turn down "friend" requests from total strangers, and wrote it into my signature that I do so. Despite that, the requests from strangers continue to arrive.

    Now I wonder whether there is any point in continuing to regard "friend" status as meaning anything at all. I am thinking that, rather than be selective about accepting requests, maybe I should just treat it as the meaningless piece of bullshit that I think it is for most people on this site and accept all requests.

    So I ask you: what, if anything, does "friend" status on this site mean to you? Do you exercise any selection in approving requests?
     
  2. molotovmuffin

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    Calboner I am so glad you brought this up. I personally seem to be a collector of friends, friends and more friends. Come one and all... but I plan to remove many of those. I prefer to keep it to those members that I actually like to talk to. With that said... I guess this is fair warning... lol.
     
  3. lfmbstyle

    lfmbstyle New Member

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    To me, the "friend" status is a function that can be used either for adding friends, or when someone becomes interested in someone else, keep in contact, or get in touch with this person... I recognize many people do not respect its name "friends" and spawn adding everyone they find interesting.
    If you don't feel comfortable enough to add strangers people that might become your friends in the future(or not), is completely understandable
     
  4. naughty

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    It depends upon the person. I understand that for some individuals it is seen as notches on the belt. However, there are others for whom it is an entree into the larger LPSG community. It is what you make of it.
     
  5. helgaleena

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    The folk I interact with here rarely ask me to 'friend' and I have seldom asked anyone to be my LPSG 'friend' either. I don't think it's anything important except that there comes a little notice when those people are online at the same time as you. That perhaps would mean something functional if I were one who likes to use the chat area. But I do not chat so it becomes a collection of decorative link-icons only, much like at Myspace or similar.
     
  6. invisibleman

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    Online friends are just that. I don't really "expect" online friends to be REAL life friends. I know some peeps on MySpace with thousands and thousands of friends on their accounts. Do you really think that they are sending their online friends gifts on Christmas? On their birthdays? Do you think that all of these online friends get invited to Thanksgiving? Who would be cooking for that daunting task? NOT I. :smile:

    I don't really have a criteria or an application list for people wanting to be my "online" friend on LPSG or any social networking type site. I usually will accept a person's friend request on here if a person requests it from me. I don't do much friend requesting. I usually allow people to decide if they want to be my online friend.

    But when it comes to meeting people in real life...I do have some criteria. That is private...and does involve a bit of instinct and some common sense. I don't meet people for sex via LPSG. I can get sex without computer intermediaries or websites.
     
  7. molotovmuffin

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    Why not? If that's the case then why bother and just call them online acquaintances... which is what they are... just like in real life.:mad: Someone called you my imaginary friends....
     
  8. D_Portelay Porquesword

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    While it may be difficult to distinguish the motivation behind an otherwise stranger's friend request. It is not totally unheard of here.

    Some people view this site as a source of eye candy, others read the endless posts and contribute accordingly.

    Since this is the day and age of the vanishing social graces, on average, people will send a friend request without having first had a friendly exchange. This has happened to me as well.

    Not to sound anything other than complimentary, for someone as attractive Cal there is going to be the usual barrage of friend requests. He is handsome, intelligent and he has a nice knob. *wink*

    I set my friends list to private, I don't accept invites from people I do not know, I am not a "notch filler" and after a time if that person who did make the effort doesn't leave a visitor's note or pm me. They go bye bye.

    A friend had stalker issues last year, that mental reject stalker person still roams the web like a ravenous beast looking for clues to my friend's whereabouts and he knows we remain in contact so I put everything "friends only" accordingly.

    I used to think it was a contradiction in terms when setting your profile to private on any form of networking site. I no longer feel that way and as a result I am VERY guarded.

    I cannot fault Cal for his frustrations at all.
     
    #8 D_Portelay Porquesword, Feb 10, 2010
    Last edited: Feb 10, 2010
  9. vince

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    Well I use to be selective, but now I just accept almost all requests and then if they have not made any contact through profile comments or pm or in the forums, I delete them. The list is due for a culling right now.
     
  10. invisibleman

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    I don't really understand the :mad: and the imaginary friend statement. Elaborate further.
     
  11. B_Nick8

    B_Nick8 New Member

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    I'm pretty selective about who's on my friends list. I don't view the people I meet here as "just internet friends"; they are people I respect, admire and enjoy (and whom I have often met in real life) and I like my list to reflect that.

    I don't accept people with whom I've never interacted, or who joined last week (or 4 years ago) and who have no posts to speak of because I simply don't know them. I'm reasonably clear about that in my signature so when I get requests from people who don't even bother to contact me first, it indicates to me that they're simply collecting avatars or "friends". Even when contacted, I reply thanking them and explain that I would like to get to know them first before we get to that next level. I find that rarely happens

    I've been told I'm taking it too seriously but I really don't think so. It's simply a matter of preference. From the whole "known by the company you keep"/ "birds of a feather" perspective, it's rather reflective.
     
  12. Countryguy63

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    My friends list contains some of my friends here, but some are folks that have requested, and then never heard from again.

    However, my "friends" here are my real friends also. I have met some wonderful, genuine people here.
     
  13. invisibleman

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  14. Hand_Solo

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    I pretty much just add anybody who requests it, and then forget about it. It's pretty meaningless IMO. I think I only talk to one of the people on my list of friends.
     
  15. B_mitchymo

    B_mitchymo New Member

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    I'll add anyone and everyone to be honest out of pure nicety knowing that i'll have a quarterly spring clean and say bye bye to those who i don't interact with.
     
  16. D_Andreas Sukov

    D_Andreas Sukov Account Disabled

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    I thought about being selective, but then i just add anyone. My real friends on here know who they are. I sometimes clean it up abit, but i seem to fail at it as people still appear as online.
     
  17. L_Lynn

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    Since 3 of my 4 albums are private, I expect to have some interaction before accepting a friend request. I like to be wooed. :biggrin1:

    When I reach 20, I go through and remove anyone I don't communicate with reglularly.
     
  18. HazelGod

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    Sagely put.
     
  19. gymfresh

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    I actually look at my friends list every day and think about each and every person on it. From time to time I let people know how much I appreciate them befriending me here. I'm open about including people as contacts, but pretty selective about friends. For the first year and a half my friends group was only 6 people that I had exchanged messages with and/or admired for their thoughtful, articulate posting. Since I don't have pics up at the moment, I don't get a lot of random friend requests. I like it that way.

    So, in answer to Calboner's question, friend status on LPSG most definitely does have meaning for me.
     
  20. unique_exposure

    unique_exposure New Member

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    Yeah it does actually mean something to me, I do try to correspond with those who want to "friend me", even if its just hi or a quick chat.

    I have 22 friends in my list, 2 of whom are dead, 4 have been banned, but I like to see their names there.

    But then again you're not going to click with everyone, as two people from this thread made pretty clear when I tried to friend them. Lesson learned.
     
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