Does it get better? anyone else feel like this? experiences?

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1036627

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I’m 28 and after experimenting for my entire adult life until now, I’ve come to the following conclusion about my sexuality. I like men and women for different reasons and different times.

I yearn for dad figures for intimacy. I love to watch them shower and pee and get dressed and I love to hold them and be held against a hairy older man. I love to subtle dominance, a gentile squeeze of reassurance on the back of my neck or a push on the small of my back to tell me to walk in front of them. I love their decisiveness and the feeling of being chosen as special and protected by them. I don’t yearn for them sexually though. I like to watch them fuck women in porn but I don’t want to be kissed or touched in that way myself. Yet thinking about them uses 90% of my interest. I’m jealous of women with they with these dad types, and of the kids that got to be raised by them.

With women, I like pussy and them physically, I like being in that dominant roll when I’m feeling up to it, but they emotionally turn me off completely. The way they talk and even look at me sometimes kills my buzz, I don’t find them interesting or watch to watch them shower or change or do any of the things I want to be involved with older dad type men. Things I know other 28 year old men probably jack off too.

Again I have experimented and this is as far as I got. Has anyone else felt like this? I have talked with therapists and have gotten a range of responses. It’s just infuriating because I’m never quite satisfied.

Thanks in advance
 
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Trevor

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Just curious was your dad around when you were growing up? Now that I am older I run into younger guys in their 20s all the time who are looking for a masculine dad type. Most were raised by single moms, or their parents divorced when they were very young and their dad was never around or if he was around he was a jerk, a drunk, or emotionally distant when they were a boy or even worse an abusive asshole who beat the shit out of him.
 
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Hey Trevor,

He wasn't, i was basally raised by my mom and sister. Its a big thing for me, yearning just for a dad but I haven't found a way to find one. Looking online they only want sex so Ive never found a healthy solution. Have you seen any solution?

Thanks
 
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Just curious was your dad around when you were growing up? Now that I am older I run into younger guys in their 20s all the time who are looking for a masculine dad type. Most were raised by single moms, or their parents divorced when they were very young and their dad was never around or if he was around he was a jerk, a drunk, or emotionally distant when they were a boy or even worse an abusive asshole who beat the shit out of him.
Sorry I didn't @Trevor!
 
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maybe just tell them you just want a cuddle buddy. haha. I have several younger guys I meet up and hang with just to cuddle and stuff like that. no sex.
fuck, why cant i live in Virginia ha
 

dickthrobbing

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I’m 28 and after experimenting for my entire adult life until now, I’ve come to the following conclusion about my sexuality. I like men and women for different reasons and different times.

I yearn for dad figures for intimacy. I love to watch them shower and pee and get dressed and I love to hold them and be held against a hairy older man. I love to subtle dominance, a gentile squeeze of reassurance on the back of my neck or a push on the small of my back to tell me to walk in front of them. I love their decisiveness and the feeling of being chosen as special and protected by them. I don’t yearn for them sexually though. I like to watch them fuck women in porn but I don’t want to be kissed or touched in that way myself. Yet thinking about them uses 90% of my interest. I’m jealous of women with they with these dad types, and of the kids that got to be raised by them.

With women, I like pussy and them physically, I like being in that dominant roll when I’m feeling up to it, but they emotionally turn me off completely. The way they talk and even look at me sometimes kills my buzz, I don’t find them interesting or watch to watch them shower or change or do any of the things I want to be involved with older dad type men. Things I know other 28 year old men probably jack off too.

Again I have experimented and this is as far as I got. Has anyone else felt like this? I have talked with therapists and have gotten a range of responses. It’s just infuriating because I’m never quite satisfied.

Thanks in advance

Yep, pretty much the same except now being older I like younger guys paying me attention, they have a much quicker recovery after cuming than i do now. I can understand you point about not necessarily wanting to have sex, I have meet with a one or two young guys who just wanted be around me, even spend the night in bed but no sex, although one did change his mind once I gave him a BJ.

I am emotionally attracted to women and my relationships are with women
 
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@dickthrobbing Thank you for your reply thats great. May I ask, did you have a dad growing up too? Do you tell your women about your- I call it father hunger, but your yearning for men? thanks!
 

dickthrobbing

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@dickthrobbing Thank you for your reply thats great. May I ask, did you have a dad growing up too? Do you tell your women about your- I call it father hunger, but your yearning for men? thanks!
Yes my father was present when I grew up and through most of my adult life.
I do have one girl friend who is into BDSM she likes to see some of her boys enjoy each others company and actually supervises it, and usually gets involved with her srtapon, usually fucking the guy who thinks he's the top

When I was younger I did not yearn for older guys as a dad figure, I was quite happy to get good sex with any range, same today; its just now being older there are some lads who desire the dad figure some are not into sex although most do venture into sex
 

flooble

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I mean, it seems relatively obvious that you're yearning for the daddy figure you never had, and because you're an adult, intimacy and sex are intertwined.

Beyond that...try looking for daddy types on Scruff, Silverdaddies, or Daddyhunt. They all have more room for profile information than Grindr does, you could be pretty granular and explicit about exactly what you're looking for. I think there's probably a lot of daddy-type guys who'd love that level of caring intimacy with someone without it having to be sexual Olympics all the time.
 
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@flooble Thank you I will sign up for those now.

@sdbg Wish we were closer you seem to be exactly when I yearn for.

When did you guys start to figure this stuff out for yourselves? You just learned though experimentation?