Does it make me a racist if I'm only truly sexually attractive to white guys?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by matt121matt121, Jun 3, 2009.

  1. matt121matt121

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    Just curious:
    Does it make me a racist if I'm only truly sexually attractive to white guys?

    I mean its just what I'm use to I guess, since in the midwest where I lived before (and grew up lived for like the first 24 years of my life) the only real choices were white, black, and mexican.

    I mean I've meet a few latino guys that are cool, but definitely not into cuban, overly spanish guys, I've never really been into black or mexican guys.

    And if I was to expect to be in a long term relationship I just think that the chances of it lasting longer would be highly increased if it was with a white guy.

    There are lots of things to consider such as commonality in language, clothing, music, activities, friends, families, etc.

    So my question is does this make me racist, or a bad person?

    I mean I'm not against people of other races, I just don't want to date them or have sex with them in most cases, though there is always the possibility of exceptions to every rule.
     
  2. SEXXXX

    SEXXXX New Member

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    not racist if you don't brag about it in public

    hey, everyone has preference
     
  3. Incocknito

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    Does it make me homophobic if I'm not attracted to men?
    Does it make me anti-semitic if I'm not attracted to Jews?
     
  4. morsecode

    morsecode New Member

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    No. But what I bolded, what is it?
     
  5. SensualHer

    SensualHer Member

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    People like what they like... Does it mean that I'm prejudice against short men because I like tall ones? What about the fact that I'm disgusted by a guy with a gut versus a guy with flat tummy? The beer bellied short guys are going to riot outside my home! Guess I'll stay in tonight...!

    I think that you just need to expand your horizons as far as clothing, music, activities, friends, families, ect. Go to ATL for gay pride.
    I'm no opposed to dating any race. I just require them to be intelligent, athletic, and very well rounded. No PUN INTENDED.. TEEHEET! :smile:

    Maybe if you added this to your criteria you'd find what you're looking for?
     
  6. laughatbig

    laughatbig New Member

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    No it does not make you racist. What would make you racist is if you could not tolarate being around other races and if you find stereotypical remarks to say about other racist that are harmful. Do not bother yourself with your preferance, you are a good person.
     
  7. DiscoBoy

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    You've left yourself open for the possibility, so nobody can call you a racist. We don't choose who we're attracted to so there's no reason for you to feel guilty. Also, I feel the same way. I'm not attracted to them per se, but I'd never rule out dating a non-white person. To be completely honest, I'd rather not even date a person of my own race, because through my own experience, I've found that a large portion of them are completely obnoxious (listen to a Portuguese man talk about Cristiano Ronaldo and his key role in leading Man U and you'll understand what I mean).

    And for the recrod, I'm as dark as many of my South American friends.
     
  8. overninept5

    overninept5 New Member

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    NO, not at all. But I will say this, as has already been stated, open yourself up to some other things. Ya might enjoy them. We like whom we like! I do think, it shows you are open to questioning, and that is always a good thing. Good for you guy.
     
  9. LongandBigSub

    LongandBigSub New Member

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    I don't think your racist. You just have preferences. Your not condoning
    anyone of another race from doing anything. You're just focused on
    how you live your life; not how anyone of another race chooses to live theirs.

    But I think it's ignorant to be non white (asian, black, hispanic)
    and have others of your own race (asian, black, hispanic) call you a
    "traitor" because you date people outside your own race. I mean WTF?
    So there's reverse "racism" there too. I mean we can date who we want
    to date, and not feel we're dissing our race. Isn't that the point of
    overcoming the label of a minority? You can do what you want to do, and
    date who you want to date, even if you're perceived as not following
    what is perceived as the majority.

    Botton line - do what feels good to you. And it's your preference.
    I mean no one complains if you prefer Coke over Pepsi, because that's
    what you like. The same applies to other avenues of what you like or
    don't like in what you want to have in your life.
     
  10. D_Ireonsyd_Colonrinse

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    matt121matt121 writes:


    Just curious:
    Does it make me a racist if I'm only truly sexually attractive to white guys?

    Now, allow me to selectively quote.

    ".. its just what I'm use to I guess... midwest... the only real choices were white, black, and mexican... definitely not into cuban, overly spanish guys, I've never really been into black or mexican guys... does this make me racist, or a bad person?... I'm not against people of other races, I just don't want to date them or have sex with them... "



    matt. You sound very troubled. This post can be viewed as a psychological Rorschach test. You feel driven towards the white cock, yet you feel like a bigot because the black and hispanic cock doesn't turn you on.


    Here's an easy test:

    Did you vote for Barack Obama as president? If you voted for Barack Obama and do not like black cock, there's a chance you may not be racist.

    If you did not vote for Barack Obama and also do not like black cock, then we see a pattern emerging.

    Your post indicates that you have a problem with mixed-race cock also. That you still veer towards a whites-only approach to sex when there's a Derek Jeeter in the room. If you found out one of your past sexual partners was, in fact, mulatto, would you feel retroactively non-sexual? (you don't have a "one drop rule" to your whte sexual partners do you?)



    :wink: ok. my friend Nick8 has instructed me to always put "wink" smiley at the end of such posts as this. So people will know I'm just joshing.
     
  11. drrionelli

    drrionelli New Member

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    Welll, first of all matt, let's define "race."

    Now, what is it about non-whites that you find unappealing? The commonalities you mention are really just that...things in common. Any of your fellow countrymen will have more like you than they will be different from you. So, while it doesn't seem that you're a racist (whatever that actually is), you seem to be something of an isolationist. Which is to say that you seem concerned with wanting to separate yourself from others more than you separating others from you.

    To each his/her own. However, do know that you're missing out on a lot of interesting people and learning about this great diverse world in which we live. After all, even the people we are dating, or even those with whom we're just having casual sex, are complex beings with more of interest and depth than just their genitalia (no pun intended, of course).

    It seems that you're after a perception of what is White rather than what actually is. And, willtom27 raises a cogent point: Suppose you found that a past partner were actually biracial or of a non-white background. Would that compromise your feelings for him? Or, better yet, suppose that you found yourself attracted to a fellow, but learned that he was, despite outward appearances, not Caucasian? Is it really your feelings that concern you, or is it how you feel that others will view you?
     
    #11 drrionelli, Jun 3, 2009
    Last edited: Jun 3, 2009
  12. invisibleman

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    No. It doesn't make you a racist if you aren't attracted to people of color sexually.

    Consensuality is key. I have met white men who only date dark skinned men. I have met women who date only dark skinned men. And if I liked a white guy and he liked white women...white guys...or whatever...I would have to deal with that and respect that. But
    some people aren't mindful of those things.

    For example. When I was in my mid-twenties, I liked this white guy. But I didn't know the protocols of dating and the consensuality of it. I didn't make any moves on the guy. I did get to meet him for coffee. He didn't like me at all. (I didn't know any better. I took it kinda personal.) He said some things to me that weren't nice and I didn't date blond guys for a looooonnnnnggg while. :frown1: I avoided that guy at the club and at other places where he would be around because of that conversation with him. I dated a whole bunch of brunet guys for three years. And then I met a blond guy that was really nice to me...but his dad didn't like the fact he was dating me. And he assaulted and verbally abused --many times-- his own son over being with me so I broke up with him in a really nice and loving way. We both cried.

    Another example: I have been chased and cruised by a lot of women. And I wasn't doing anything to warrant all that. I am not into women at all. The crazy thing is that most of these women know that I am gay. I have had a lot of public dates with guys. But I think that lately, they think that because I am not dating any men that I am bi or something. Crazy shit.

    Man, after my last relationship...and the way it ended...I am pretty disappointed. If I were bi, I guess I would date the opposite sex after all of that BS. But I am wanting a man...but I am unsure if I will find that man. A man that is the one for me. And I am not going through the drama for a man with tendencies for drama.

    So, I have learned. I don't bother too many people. I am a consensual minded person. If I liked a guy and he didn't like me because he liked only white guys. I respect that. I stay away from him.

    I have met a few anti interracial dating people before. Those people have the inability to see that people of differing races could date. And it is hard being around those people.
     
    #12 invisibleman, Jun 3, 2009
    Last edited: Jun 3, 2009
  13. ejection_handle

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    No. A racist can be sexually attracted to another race by the way. You should know if you are a racist or not by the way. But just think about your assumption this way; is there at least one person who is not white that you find sexually appealing. I am totally into white cock only but if A-Rod was ever available I'd be batter up and ready to go.
     
  14. SEXXXX

    SEXXXX New Member

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    maybe racist is not the word, CULTURIST is something more appropriate in explaining some rejections on cross cultural relations
     
  15. StormyB

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    No it doesn't lol but it is a bit shallow of you, not to worry though we are all a bit shallow. Most of us want a sexy "girl/boy" some of us want a smart "girl/boy" and some of us are greedy "me" and want both. Some of us want a really tall "boy/girl" while some of us prefer an average or short "girl/boy" it's all the same really. So unless you don't mean it in a racist way like "I don't like non-white people" then it's not racist...just a little, tiny bit shallow...but that's ok....because we all are....except me.....because i'm perfect :smile:
     
  16. AG08

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    I don't think it makes you racist. I'm only attracted to people from my race as well. I once made out with a girl who was mixed (white and Asian), but she really didn't do anything for me, so I didn't pursue it. She wanted our realtionship to go further, but I cut it off because you can't force something that isn't there. Every other girl that I have fooled around with, had sex with, dated, and now married to was/is white. You are attracted to what you are attracted to. I knew a white girl (blonde hair, blue eyes) in university who was only attracted to black guys. You like what you like, that simple. Even though I'm straight, I find some men attractive and enjoy checking them out at the gym and in the locker room and shower. Personally I only find white guys attractive to look at and admire in those situations. Other races just don't do anything for me.

    **Please guys, don't get all over my back about claiming to be straight, but finding some white guys attractive. All guys find other guys attractive, but for cultural reasons won't admit it. I'm secure enough in my sexuality to admit that I find guys attractive. However, that doesn't mean that I want to have sex or an intimate relationship with them, I just find it enjoyable to check them out.
     
  17. Dave NoCal

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    Matt and all, something to consider are the strong, sometimes unspoken "rules" here in the U.S. that people of different cultures/races really shouldn't voluntarily associate with each other. You can be polite and pleasant at work. Office functions after hours are cool. However, carrying it beyond social obligation is viewed with suspicion. Obviously this varies between individuals, social groups, and regions of the country. Still, for example, it is widely assumed that there is something "wrong" with a woman who dates/has sex with/marries an African American man.

    I think these messages are powerful and permeate our consciousness. I also think that it is important to recognise that these "rules" exist to limit everyone's options and keep minority people isolated from the mainstream of society. Matt, as others have, I encourage you to broaden your horizons. There is ample opportunity where you are living now. You never know.....

    Dave
     
  18. widenine

    widenine New Member

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    I'm sure you have your preferences for many things. But fundamentally, by excluding other races just because they are other races is off putting to me. Archie bunker was supposed to be a racist "on TV", and you have mirrored many of his remarks. Only you know what's in your heart and how it got there. I don't , however, believe it rings true that you like what you like because that's what you've known. I really hate that "I'm from the white part of America" argument.

    There's way too much information available in our world for that kind of rationale to persist. If you think "white" is pretty and non-white is Less pretty, you need to just say it so that the healing can begin. Enough with the re-hashed, unbelievable excuses. What you're telling us is that you're not used to having even close platonic friendships with other types of people.
     
    #18 widenine, Jun 3, 2009
    Last edited: Jun 3, 2009
  19. invisibleman

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    Well-- I wonder if everyone could date everyone, would everyone be happy? I know that I am not sure. I find myself frustrated at times. I don't date many men like I used to.

    I really don't like people telling me who I should date. Especially when people think that they are cute and I don't find them attractive. If people don't like me dating who I want, then, they can get a life. Date the people you like.

    Someone loves Justin Timberlake. Someone loves 50Cent. But I don't like any of them sexually. But I am of the opinion, there are people that would love to fuck them--I am not interested in them. Everything is gravy.

    I was watching an episode on "Hard living as gay in the hood " on Tyra Banks Show on YouTube. And a black guy on the street was interviewed and he thought that gay men were gross and disgusting...and he intimated that HE was going to do something about those gays in his "hood" (violence was the implication). I was like "DAMN". :eek::frown1:

    Why I bring this up? It is relevant. People have their clear-cut ideals...but in reality--people aren't as clear-cut. We are the same yet very dynamic individuals. Yet we have these religions. We have laws. We have media infrastructures. Molding public opinions into confined parameters. And if you as a human being fall outside those conventions...you are branded with big Scarlet A and ostracized.



    But I may not be able to date people that other people like. I never tell anyone who they should date regarding their race or their gender.
     
  20. B_VinylBoy

    B_VinylBoy New Member

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    It's a bit much to call someone racist because they have a particular sexual preference to a certain type of male. Personally I wouldn't turn down a good opportunity for a good lay regardless of the person's skin color, even though I do have my own personal preferences.

    I could be in the mood for beef... but if a nice cut of pork comes along in the process I'll definitely give it a taste. :wink:
     
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