Ok Ive been talking to a guy for a few weeks now online and a had a few dates. He says he really likes me alot but i dot feel anything for him. how do i go about break it off with out breaking his heart?
Dont feel for him
- Thread starter redvsblue35959
- Start date
Be honest with him. Getting your feelings hurt blows, but in the end I would want someone to be honest with me rather than lie to my face.
Principessa
Expert Member
Do it quickly, but gently, like pulling off a band-aid. Tell him you just aren't that into him. :redface: Do try to avoid cliches such as: "It's not you, it's me."
I agree. Instead, how about "It's not me, it's you" ?:biggrin1:
Sorry. Seriously though it's never easy but has to be done and the other person will be pleased you are honest although a little upset but that's how it must be.
I have heard a theory that if someone fancies you then you always have the capacity to fancy them. I think this is not true.
Principessa
Expert Member
That's ridiculous! I do however believe that in any relationship there is always one person who loves just a little bit more than the other person.
You can't break his heart after just a few weeks. Pretending to like him for 10 years, then breaking up, THAT would break his heart. Just be honest, and go your separate ways. Saves you both time.
I agree with Jovial, you've only had a few dates with him, hardly long enough for him to enter deeply into a relationship. Tell him sorry you don't want to see him anymore, don't make any excuses, just be honest.
scottbud
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dudepiston
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Ha ha ha! Oh, REALLY, Jovial? I guess you've never really fallen hard for someone! Of course this guy can be "in love" with the original poster after just a few weeks! Haven't you ever really fallen hard for someone? Maybe you don't have a heart that breaks so easily, but some guys (me incl) do. I think it's sweet that he wants to break it to him gently and is trying to be thoughtful of the guys feelings. Kudos to him! But yes, I'm in the "be honest" camp. Dragging it out longer will only make that band-aid harder to pull off, and hurt more in the long run.
No, I've never fallen hard for someone. The OP said they only had a few dates, so it sounded like it couldn't be too serious. The point is, like you say, the longer he waits the more it will hurt. And it adds to the hurt when someone doesn't think you could handle the truth, and that can lead to anger also.
MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK
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Dig it- That's been a well used, time honored quote for yours truly. Does it without making the other person feel like they've been shot down.
That's absurd- if you just don't feel a connection, then time has no limit to disclose that to the other person, years, days, months weeks, etc., etc,etc.. Beats dragging it out after a year of not feeling anything & then decide.
