Drifting away from a friend

[jeff black]

Yeah yeah, you always say that...

You don't bring me flowers
You don't sing me love songs
You hardly talk to me anymore
When I come through the door
At the end of the day

...Jus sayin' Jeff. :wink:

Dude, nothing hurts more than feeling like you are giving more into a relationship (whether it be friendship or otherwise) only to discover the other person has lost complete interest in you.

I'm just offering him a few solutions so that he can assess the sitaution.

 

[deleted3782]

Dude...

*Takes flowers and love songs and goes home.*

Lighten up, its only Sunday.

 

[morsecode]

@ jeff. Thanks for the post, and the advise, I really appreciate it. But, there are some things I have to specify, I guess, I'm not from Canada, I met her in my country of origin a couple of months prior to the move, so I don't know if I'll see her again, and because of the move most of our relationship developed on e-mail and MSN. I don't know anyone else, just the people I go to school with, and I would call them good friends, I have never been frinds with anyone else before her, I'm kind of a functioning antisocial, if that makes sense. So, I guess the relationship ran its natural course and hit a wall, maybe in the future will be different I don't know, hopefully it will, I love her dearly...I remember when I became depressed and practically fused with my bed for a month, she was the only one outside my family who was worried, I mean, I didn't go out at all, and when I got better I found a barrage of worried e-mails from her, because she hadn't heard anything from me for a while...so I don't know, I just hope she's happy, and she gets to do what she loves, and get out of that shitty country.

 

[rbkwp]

Really interesting thread
Over the years i have lost contact with quite a few of .. at the time very close friends
While other friendships have developed these latter ones are a lot different to the earlier ones
Dont know but i think when yr younger they tend to be more of an 'emotional attatchment' type of friendship
Latter ones of course as you mature so do the type of friends you make
and so it goes on
Wish i was like xcuze and maintained those earlier friendships .. many overseas now and just seems no way of regaining there trust & friendship etc.. even thru there Parents.
So .. i have really come to accept .. its the way it goes
Lot easier and less drama,s
enz
sidenote- went to fiji when 18 odd
got about 20 souvenier swords engraved with
'family,friends and love' .. important to me at the time
over the next 6/8 years i gave each friend one of these swords....have to laff now..as i DONT expect any one of the then friends to have retained such a childish?? thing still..ha

 

[nitsud]

Dude, nothing hurts more than feeling like you are giving more into a relationship (whether it be friendship or otherwise) only to discover the other person has lost complete interest in you.

I'm just offering him a few solutions so that he can assess the sitaution.

Dude you are so right. A friend once told me that "All good things must come to an end". Even if you are not ready.

 

[jeff black]

@ jeff. Thanks for the post, and the advise, I really appreciate it. But, there are some things I have to specify, I guess, I'm not from Canada, I met her in my country of origin a couple of months prior to the move, so I don't know if I'll see her again, and because of the move most of our relationship developed on e-mail and MSN. I don't know anyone else, just the people I go to school with, and I would call them good friends, I have never been frinds with anyone else before her, I'm kind of a functioning antisocial, if that makes sense. So, I guess the relationship ran its natural course and hit a wall, maybe in the future will be different I don't know, hopefully it will, I love her dearly...I remember when I became depressed and practically fused with my bed for a month, she was the only one outside my family who was worried, I mean, I didn't go out at all, and when I got better I found a barrage of worried e-mails from her, because she hadn't heard anything from me for a while...so I don't know, I just hope she's happy, and she gets to do what she loves, and get out of that shitty country.

Well, that does change things a bit. Missing out of friendships, of course you are going to mourn the potential death of one. I still stick with my original comments, but I add this:

As hard as it is being antisocial, you need to take that next step, speak with those friends from school and try to grow as an individual. It's a pain in the ass to do, but if you succeed, you will feel alot better about this particular situaton.

Though, to be fair, I've never been antisocial in the slightest. However, i have had friends drift away from me as life changed direction. It does happen.

Good luck, morse.

 

[D_Relentless Original]

Similar here, things these days are so much faster, people are busier, stresses are more prominant.

Sounds selfish but look after yourself first and friends secondly otherwise you could hurt, i have been there.

 

[whatsup123456]

It is always really sad when friends exit our lives, but usually it happens because we aren't tending to the relationship like we need. Unfortunately, being in a distance relationship without a sexual bond can be very hard to maintain... she may be moving on and she may be getting what she once got from you from other people. Honestly, you need to express what that friendship means to you in a way that she will understand. Then tell her that you fear its ending. Either she will warm up or she will continue to drift. If she continues to drift you will have to deal with it when the time comes... but unless you get it out there she will never know.