Rubenesque
Expert Member
- Joined
- Oct 12, 2006
- Posts
- 2,611
- Media
- 5
- Likes
- 109
- Points
- 193
- Location
- United Kingdom
- Sexuality
- 100% Straight, 0% Gay
- Gender
- Female
Yep tuppence is a common one..... and halfpenny (pronounced apeknee for some obscure reason).
embarrassing moments with parents
- Thread starter dave2006
- Start date
Denise I am unashamably stealing flim flam from you and using it all day today I LOVE it.
My parents are really open, but this one thing shocked me last time we visited ( they are 66 and 65)
Me: It's hard raising teens now with Extacy being so big in clubs etc, I don't now how to go about eductating her on the dangers etc.........
My MUM : mmmm...yes, big issues. Do you know anyone who has any, could you could post it to us? Your dad and I saw a documnentry on ABC and thought we'd like to try it, we enjoyed acid in the 60's
I almost died of shock ( they are very conservative) and apparenty they wanted to have sex on it as they heard it was good....aggghhhhhh....erase that from my mind someone please!!!!
:biggrin1:
Honey
My parents are really open, but this one thing shocked me last time we visited ( they are 66 and 65)
Me: It's hard raising teens now with Extacy being so big in clubs etc, I don't now how to go about eductating her on the dangers etc.........
My MUM : mmmm...yes, big issues. Do you know anyone who has any, could you could post it to us? Your dad and I saw a documnentry on ABC and thought we'd like to try it, we enjoyed acid in the 60's
I almost died of shock ( they are very conservative) and apparenty they wanted to have sex on it as they heard it was good....aggghhhhhh....erase that from my mind someone please!!!!
:biggrin1:
Honey
I seem to recall P.T. Barnum using flim-flam as a word/expression meaning fakery etc. (No, I'm not old enough to know Barnum, I was in the stage show once!)
Rubenesque
Expert Member
- Joined
- Oct 12, 2006
- Posts
- 2,611
- Media
- 5
- Likes
- 109
- Points
- 193
- Location
- United Kingdom
- Sexuality
- 100% Straight, 0% Gay
- Gender
- Female
Rubenesque
Expert Member
- Joined
- Oct 12, 2006
- Posts
- 2,611
- Media
- 5
- Likes
- 109
- Points
- 193
- Location
- United Kingdom
- Sexuality
- 100% Straight, 0% Gay
- Gender
- Female
Actually, thruppenny is traditionally rhyming slang for tit... common phrase - lovely pair of thruppennies (pronounced thrupknees). Have never heard it used in relation to clit though.
digdugm2000
Loved Member
Once when I was about 13 I went on a family vacation with my two older brothers and Mom and Dad to resort/cabin. I had to sleep in a bed with my brother and we all had to use the same bathroom. After a few days I was so horned up I had to jack off so I did it in the shower. When I finished I pulled the shower curtain back and there was my Dad in a towel, shaving and staring at my hard on. I was super embarrased and tried to grab a towel as fast as I could. He said "Jesus Doug that thing is huge" I got really embarrased and got out of there ASAP.
Later on he told me that jacking off was normal and that it's OK to do. and to use some lube so I don't get sores. He also told me that my dick was pretty big and some of the other boys might tease me about it. (Which they did)but that I should be proud of my big dick (which I am). He also told my mom to get me some new underwear cause the little boy briefs she had me wearing were not big enough. At the time I was humiliated about the whole thing but in retrospect Dad was pretty cool about it. I am glad he took the time to talk to me about it.
Later on he told me that jacking off was normal and that it's OK to do. and to use some lube so I don't get sores. He also told me that my dick was pretty big and some of the other boys might tease me about it. (Which they did)but that I should be proud of my big dick (which I am). He also told my mom to get me some new underwear cause the little boy briefs she had me wearing were not big enough. At the time I was humiliated about the whole thing but in retrospect Dad was pretty cool about it. I am glad he took the time to talk to me about it.
My grandparents were in their late 80s and they were going along just fine together, in very good shape with lots of mental and physical activity. My mother went to visit one day and while talking to them she noticed a bottle of Viagra on my grandfather's dresser!
Well!
About a month after that my grandmother forced my grandfather to trade in his car and buy a sports convertible. She said, "I'm tired of you driving an old man's car. You should be driving a convertible like when we first met."
We all laughed and called it the Viagramobile. My mother was worried about them straining themselves but apparently that wasn't a problem.
After my grandmother broke her hip at age 90, she needed full-time nursing care so they hired a nurse to come in. They didn't allow the evening nurse to come in until at least an hour after they had gone to bed but a few times the nurse would hear something or need to make sure my grandmother was sleeping in a proper position, and worry it was my grandmother's CPAP machine falling down or becoming dislodged. On one occasion I was there for that and the nurse and I crept to the door listening to make sure we weren't disturbing anything and both of us distinctly heard my 90 year old grandmother say to my 92 year old grandfather (she called him by her nickname for him which we just then discovered the reason for), "Oh Rock! I love that thing between your legs!" :banana::banana: :yikes:
Well!
About a month after that my grandmother forced my grandfather to trade in his car and buy a sports convertible. She said, "I'm tired of you driving an old man's car. You should be driving a convertible like when we first met."
We all laughed and called it the Viagramobile. My mother was worried about them straining themselves but apparently that wasn't a problem.
After my grandmother broke her hip at age 90, she needed full-time nursing care so they hired a nurse to come in. They didn't allow the evening nurse to come in until at least an hour after they had gone to bed but a few times the nurse would hear something or need to make sure my grandmother was sleeping in a proper position, and worry it was my grandmother's CPAP machine falling down or becoming dislodged. On one occasion I was there for that and the nurse and I crept to the door listening to make sure we weren't disturbing anything and both of us distinctly heard my 90 year old grandmother say to my 92 year old grandfather (she called him by her nickname for him which we just then discovered the reason for), "Oh Rock! I love that thing between your legs!" :banana::banana: :yikes:
My parents have never really said anything embarrassing about sex in front of me. However, I recall many times trying to watch TV while they were in their room alone. I'd hear this SMACK SMACK SMACK. For years I've told myself it was just dad slapping his knee because of a funny joke. FarmerHedgehog is a sick and twisted woman and tells me dad is slapping something besides his own knee. Maybe he's smacking his thigh?
On another note, mom used to read my mail even when I moved into my own apartment. One time my parents were coming over, I stuck a used condom in the middle of a card I'd gotten to break the habit. Mom got this horrid look on her face when she found it, but dad just gave me a GOOD JOB look.
At a family reunion, my aunt was asking everyone if they knew what the word fellatio meant since she'd heard it on tv.
At the dinner after Grandma's funeral, the fair included hotlinks. Her nephew, a pastor, forked one and said, "In Kentucky we call this a Tube steak". Unable to keep my mouth shut, I replied "We call something else a Tube-steak in Oklahoma." Then I turned to the wife and offered to feed her one that night. Half the family was offended, the other half was trying not to choke while laughing.
On another note, mom used to read my mail even when I moved into my own apartment. One time my parents were coming over, I stuck a used condom in the middle of a card I'd gotten to break the habit. Mom got this horrid look on her face when she found it, but dad just gave me a GOOD JOB look.
At a family reunion, my aunt was asking everyone if they knew what the word fellatio meant since she'd heard it on tv.
At the dinner after Grandma's funeral, the fair included hotlinks. Her nephew, a pastor, forked one and said, "In Kentucky we call this a Tube steak". Unable to keep my mouth shut, I replied "We call something else a Tube-steak in Oklahoma." Then I turned to the wife and offered to feed her one that night. Half the family was offended, the other half was trying not to choke while laughing.
I've had a couple embarassing moments when my parents walked in on me. When I was 16 my dad came in to my room while I was jacking off, smirked, and walked out. Later he just told me that I had a big dick, like him, and wondered why I wasn't getting layed.
Another time in my senior year I was fucking my girlfriend at the time and it was her first time, needless to say things got a little messy and we ended up getting blood all over the couch. I had to ask my mom where the hydrogen peroxide was, this demanded an explanation, and after I BS'd a story about getting a bloody nose she decided to clean it up herself. Yeah, she definitly figured it out, and although we laugh about it now, she was really disturbed at the time.
CE
Another time in my senior year I was fucking my girlfriend at the time and it was her first time, needless to say things got a little messy and we ended up getting blood all over the couch. I had to ask my mom where the hydrogen peroxide was, this demanded an explanation, and after I BS'd a story about getting a bloody nose she decided to clean it up herself. Yeah, she definitly figured it out, and although we laugh about it now, she was really disturbed at the time.
CE
- Wrat,
Don't think I would be able to justify striking someone just for something they said. Not as an adult, anyway. Not for just making a stupid rhyme.
It would embarass me to lose control of myself in front of my family, for sure.
I'm digging the Honesty stuff and all...
You wanna know? OK.
You don't wanna know? OK.
No questions? No problems.
You wanna know? OK.
You don't wanna know? OK.
No questions? No problems.
SomeGuyOverThere
Sexy Member
- Joined
- Dec 2, 2004
- Posts
- 1,382
- Media
- 0
- Likes
- 27
- Points
- 258
- Location
- Glasgow (Glasgow City, Scotland)
- Sexuality
- 60% Gay, 40% Straight
- Gender
- Male
The most embarressing thing is probably when I was telling my mother about a guy who I knew asking me about wanting to see my cock. He wasn't forcefull or unpleasent about it, he was just curious enough to open his mouth and ask(we were both about 13/14).
I had been quite shocked though and was talking to my mother about it (shes very supportive and I talk to her about a lot), I told her that he had asked me how big it was, and this was her response:
"I hope you said 8 inches. If your father is anything to go by, you should be pretty big anyway."
Talk about a conversation killer.
She was dropping me off at school, and it took me all day to get over the mental scarring.
A close second is when me, my mother and my second cousin who's a doctor. We'd gone through several lovely labels in her wine cabinet with her, and we were all rather merry. Then my mum and her started discussing their sex lives, I began wanting to curl into a ball and cease to exist, and my mum turned to me and said: "Well, you must have heard us! I tell him to keep it down but he can get carried away". Yes I had heard them, no I didn't want to think about it or acknowledge it. >_<
I had been quite shocked though and was talking to my mother about it (shes very supportive and I talk to her about a lot), I told her that he had asked me how big it was, and this was her response:
"I hope you said 8 inches. If your father is anything to go by, you should be pretty big anyway."
Talk about a conversation killer.
She was dropping me off at school, and it took me all day to get over the mental scarring.
A close second is when me, my mother and my second cousin who's a doctor. We'd gone through several lovely labels in her wine cabinet with her, and we were all rather merry. Then my mum and her started discussing their sex lives, I began wanting to curl into a ball and cease to exist, and my mum turned to me and said: "Well, you must have heard us! I tell him to keep it down but he can get carried away". Yes I had heard them, no I didn't want to think about it or acknowledge it. >_<
Okay came home after living on campus for few months and grandma says
- Oh youve lost weight
To which my mum repsonded
- Must be all that protein youre wasting!!!
- Oh youve lost weight
To which my mum repsonded
- Must be all that protein youre wasting!!!
Similar threads
