Embarrassing situation...

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by D_gcx11cv, Jul 22, 2011.

  1. D_gcx11cv

    D_gcx11cv New Member

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    Okay guys, I've never posted a thread on here before, but I feel like I need to now. First, a little background info:

    My 65 year old dad is staying with me for a while because he had hip replacement surgery a few weeks ago and is still unable to climb stairs, and he has a post-op infection and is on an antibiotic IV that a visiting nurse needs to come and check on twice a day, and I only live three blocks from the hospital in case he should need to go back. Plus, I live in a one-storey house, I've never married and have no children, and things are just very convenient for him here. I usually get home from work around 5:30, but today I had to go to the grocery store and I called him to let him know I'd be about an hour later than usual, depending on traffic. It didn't take as long as I thought and I got home a bit before 6:30. Now here's the embarrassing situation:

    When I walked into my house today, I caught my 65 year old father butt-assed naked on my couch, jacking off and watching porn on my laptop. I was quite surprised, and all I could say was "Oops. I'm sorry." and I walked into the kitchen. I was so embarrassed that I was shaking when I put the groceries in my kitchen. My dad didn't even bat an eye. He didn't try to cover himself up and he didn't stop what he was doing. All he said was, "Okay. I'll be done in a little while." About 7:00 he called to me and told me he was done and asked if I could help him get up so he go to the bathroom and get a towel to wipe up.

    I took him a towel and his robe so he could put it on before I helped him up. I couldn't even look him in the eye and I'm still so embarrassed that I don't know if I should talk to him about this or not. I don't care that he was masturbating, but if he had been doing it in the guest room, where he's staying while he's here, I wouldn't have caught him. Should I ask him to jack off in his own room or should I just get over it and assume that he'll not do it in my living room anymore?
     
  2. cumonmee

    cumonmee Member

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    Just ask if how he would have felt to have walked in and caught you masturbating on he and moms bed, when you were younger.
    Don't be mean but be firm.
     
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  3. D_Chaumbrelayne_Copprehead

    D_Chaumbrelayne_Copprehead Account Disabled

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    Yeah, it's your place, it's fine to ask that he do it in the guest room. How do you feel about him using your laptop? Did you allow him to use it in general? That would feel like a violation to me if I hadn't cleared it in advance.

    This is not about masturbation, right? It's about behavior that's OK for you in your place. Your place, your rules.
     
  4. psguy64

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    Noticed you used 'my house'. If situation was reverse, I wonder what would be his house rules?? May be you will be more flexible than your father but agree guest bedroom or some area/room is more appropriate than the living room. Beyond an embarrassing situation, think any level of discussion would be fair. I wonder what or how I would of reacted with my son or if situation would be reversed, I think I know...
     
  5. nudeyorker

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    I think it's important when you have guests (friends or family) to set some guidelines. How often do you get to say to your parents..." If you are going to live under my roof you have to live by my rules?"
     
  6. D_Roland_D_Hay

    D_Roland_D_Hay Account Disabled

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    Wow...its gonna take a lot of therapy to get that image erased from your mind.
     
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  7. CUBE

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    Say this,
    "Dad, I left some towels by your bed so you can have some privacy in your room from now on. I will leave my computer in there too for you while I am at work."

    (...Once again, CUBE solves the problem with no fuss or muss)
     
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  8. nudeyorker

    Gold Member

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    Can I come live with you?
     
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  9. D_gcx11cv

    D_gcx11cv New Member

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    Right. It's not about masturbation. I always assumed that since he is a male over the age of 13 that he masturbates, and it's not even about the laptop. I told him he could use it while I'm at work, and if he watches porn then that's his business. I just wish he had been in his own room instead of in my living room masturbating.
     
  10. D_gcx11cv

    D_gcx11cv New Member

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    Can I get an "amen!" I've never seen my dad fully naked in my life, although I have seen him in his underwear before. But to walk into my living room and see him not only naked but masturbating is an image that I'm prepared to pray for amnesia to forget.
     
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  11. shady ace

    shady ace Member

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    lol. you never beat off in his?
     
  12. D_gcx11cv

    D_gcx11cv New Member

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    Thanks, guys, for your advice. Sometimes it really is easier to ask advice from strangers than people one already knows. I think that I'm going to say nothing to him, but I am going to leave a few handtowels next to his bed. Maybe he'll get the hint and just "do his bidniss" (as we say in the south) in there.
     
  13. D_gcx11cv

    D_gcx11cv New Member

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    No. When I was still a kid and living at home, I never beat off in the living room. Always in my bedroom or the bathroom, and quite often in the barn where the only eyes that spied on me (to my knowledge) were the horses. If anybody else saw me, they never let me know it.
     
  14. readytocum

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    did your dad had laptop before...maybe it was new to him?...bar are empty, cruise area are empty...sex is on internet now...to bad but reality...why are we here????
     
  15. D_Kitten_Kaboodle

    D_Kitten_Kaboodle Account Disabled

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    This is your answer, and yes CUBE, no fuss, no muss.
    This is about one thing and one thing only.... Location, Location, Location!

    Good luck, if you and your dad have a good relationship (as it appears you do b/c he was comfortable with you seeing him in the midst of such a private act) then this issue can easily be solved using CUBE's suggestion.

    ((Also, never assume that it won't happen again in the LR if you don't address it!))
     
  16. rbkwp

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    Wow...its gonna take a lot of therapy to get that image erased from your mind.


    Now Now rico27 .. ha i thought of that but have no guts to say it ha
    however i will say OP you should consider suggesting to dad to do his Pvte bizness in his own room, its only fair to both of yous, and prevents the possibility ..God forbid, that it may happen again . and again??
    enz

    Good on him for retaining the Spirit of it all ha
     
  17. D_gcx11cv

    D_gcx11cv New Member

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    Thanks. My dad and I do have a great relationship, which is why I think that he decided to come stay with me while he convelesces. I'm not going to make a huge deal out of it, but I am going to leave some handtowels in his room for him for future, and I'm going to leave my laptop in their for him, as well, since I have a desk computer in room. I want him to feel at home here, but not *that* at home. Again, thanks.
     
  18. shady ace

    shady ace Member

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    I digress.
     
  19. CUBE

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    Say these words to him! If you just do the actions alone he won't get it. You don't have to face him. Just say it kind of from you in the kitchen to him on the couch.

    The good thing is...you dad jacks off. I mean, seriously, this is some tension relief for him and he must feel kind of bummed with the hip situation. He had two choices when you came in the door. He could be all embarrassed or not be embarrassed. He really took the higher road. Keep the man in porn dam it. He is a man (and we need to feel like a man) so just don't shame the guy. I mean, I know you won't, but keep it simple and drop it. Cheers
     
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  20. D_gcx11cv

    D_gcx11cv New Member

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    My dad and I just had a talk. He brought it up, not me. He told me that he's sorry that I walked in him in *that* situation, but that he was "too far gone" to just stop. Well, what he actually said was "I was too close to cumming to stop." Then he said that since we're both men he didn't think that I would make too much of a big deal of it. I told him that catching your father naked and jerking off in your living room is a pretty big deal, but that I'd get over it. He apoligized again and said, "I'm just glad you didn't have anyone with you" and we both laughed at that. I told him that I'll leave some towels in his room from now on and that he can use my laptop while he's here to help him "relieve his tension". He said he would appreciate it. I asked him why he chose to do it in the living room when he could have taken the computer into his room. He said he thought that the computer had to be in the same room as the wireless router, otherwise he would have. I guess that's a reasonable answer since he's never used a wireless computer before, and I always leave it on the coffee table in the living room. But, guys, all is well and since he's not embarrassed (or doesn't appear to be, anyway) I don't think I should be either. After all, he's 65 and I'm 41, and it's not like he was doing anything that would bring about the end of the world. Now I feel quite silly about the whole thing and having bothered you guys with it. My dad is really a cool guy, and I should have known that he would talk about this sooner rather than later and smooth everything over.
    Thanks again, y'all, for your good advice.
     
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