I think that this is a big issue, and I am interested in the different takes that people may have and what relevance their sex and orientation has on their thoughts.
I have emotional bonds (friends) where there is no sex. I have friends with whom I have had sex, but our friendship is the stronger bond. People with whom I have made a strong sexual emotional bond, but are not friends as such.
Great sex does develop in my experience a strong emotional bond. But this does not have to lead to lasting friendship or relationships. I just wonder whether maybe not understanding these things and not having the experience to recognise the differences is something that creates problems in relationships.
For example, those who do not believe in sex before marriage. You may have developed an emotional bond, but you might find that that bond is not strengthened by the emotional bond that good sex gives. Do you believe that the mere act of sex is enough to strengthen that bond irrespective of its quality and emotional value to you?
I wonder whether men are generally able to be more open to the distinction whereas our culture still teaches women that you can't have a strong sexual emotional bond without having a friendship/respect emotional bond beforehand. Or are women generally and genuinely different in this respect?
I say generally because I do know women who are not interested in relationships at all, beyond the bedroom. And for the record, when I was younger, I was forever confusing a strong sexual bond with a wider relationship bond.
I have emotional bonds (friends) where there is no sex. I have friends with whom I have had sex, but our friendship is the stronger bond. People with whom I have made a strong sexual emotional bond, but are not friends as such.
Great sex does develop in my experience a strong emotional bond. But this does not have to lead to lasting friendship or relationships. I just wonder whether maybe not understanding these things and not having the experience to recognise the differences is something that creates problems in relationships.
For example, those who do not believe in sex before marriage. You may have developed an emotional bond, but you might find that that bond is not strengthened by the emotional bond that good sex gives. Do you believe that the mere act of sex is enough to strengthen that bond irrespective of its quality and emotional value to you?
I wonder whether men are generally able to be more open to the distinction whereas our culture still teaches women that you can't have a strong sexual emotional bond without having a friendship/respect emotional bond beforehand. Or are women generally and genuinely different in this respect?
I say generally because I do know women who are not interested in relationships at all, beyond the bedroom. And for the record, when I was younger, I was forever confusing a strong sexual bond with a wider relationship bond.