what gives you that release? i know a lot of people feel frustrated if they do not orgasm during sex. that build up of pressure and tension without the release. i was never consciously aware of feeling that during sex but i certainly got it during masturbation. i just don't orgasm during sex but i've recently found that i get an enormous sense of physical and emotional release, far more so than with an orgasm, from my partner making me cry during sex. it may be partly because i cry so rarely and keep my emotions under constant control. a tad vulcan i suppose. so, for me, breaking down those controls provides release. i'm sure other people have their ways and means to achieve the same. share.