Ever give the "shy guy" a chance?

[D_Hammond Happydipper]

I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with women pursuing men, but it's really rare, and she probably have to really like you a lot to do it, and then you would have to be extremely lucky to find that that particular woman is one that you're interested in also! You might be waiting forever for love to find you, when you could just go out and live life and have experiences worth having (even if some experiences you have end up being negative) and have a life worth looking back on. It's up to you.

I consider my self fortunate, when it comes to that . But I screw up on the talking part. at:
I do keep my self approachable, so that does help.

 

[mexdude]

I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with women pursuing men, but it's really rare, and she probably have to really like you a lot to do it,

7 times happened to me, i dnt know what the h3ll i was thinking each one of those times

 

[The Dragon]

No, I wouldn't.
Why?
Because I have no use for and I am not attracted to men with no self confidence.
Shy men do not bring out my inner nurturer/earth goddess/protector and in fact, for me, they are passion killers.
While this lily livered milk sop is fretting, soft soaping his hands and trying to figure out where the devil he put his balls, at least three REAL men with cojones who know what they want and how to get it have beaten him to the punch by buying me a drink or putting moves on.
Pfftttt...sure I'm going to go for some simmering, wavering, undecided "maybe" over someone who has taken a chance and has made up their minds.

 

[petite]

I consider my self fortunate, when it comes to that . But I screw up on the talking part. at:
I do keep my self approachable, so that does help.

So it hasn't worked out for you, either? If they were interested in you, how did you screw up the talking part?

7 times happened to me, i dnt know what the h3ll i was thinking each one of those times

Seven times! And why didn't it work out? Did you not bite?

 

[mexdude]

Seven times! And why didn't it work out? Did you not bite?

Probably they where 10-15, cause 7 where as straightforward as it gets, other may have been more sutil, and i never noticed a thing, why? , I unconsciously sabotaged myself back then each time, most of those girls where on the very hot line, but i believed that i was not worthy of being with a girls like that

 

[AlteredEgo]

No, I wouldn't.
Why?
Because I have no use for and I am not attracted to men with no self confidence.
Shy men do not bring out my inner nurturer/earth goddess/protector and in fact, for me, they are passion killers.
While this lily livered milk sop is fretting, soft soaping his hands and trying to figure out where the devil he put his balls, at least three REAL men with cojones who know what they want and how to get it have beaten him to the punch by buying me a drink or putting moves on.
Pfftttt...sure I'm going to go for some simmering, wavering, undecided "maybe" over someone who has taken a chance and has made up their minds.

As has already been discussed in this thread, shyness does not automatically translate to low confidence. Funnily, while you're waiting for Mr. Cajones to make something happen, bold, gregarious women like me have already charmed him, several like him, and a couple of the cute, shy ones, and made plans to see each other again some time. But you go on ahead and sit on your ass and wait for life to happen, and hide behind the notion that a real man will find you. Go on.

 

[blasianluv85]

My guy is shy....but he is confident in himself. He doesn't talk too much or engage in a lot of conversation so it took a while to notice him. But when I did, and we started dating, boooy....lol

Uncut, really thick golden cock, with an athletic smooth body.....reward for me being non-judgemental I guess.

I think women these days should really stop using that ( if a, then b ) thinking. If he's shy then this. Or if he's this tall then that. Awesome sex, big dicks, matches made in heaven, and what not varies across people of every culture, continent, and instances.

 

[D_Hammond Happydipper]

So it hasn't worked out for you, either? If they were interested in you, how did you screw up the talking part?

Usually I get caught off guard and the conversation doesn't lead anywhere .
I end up coming off as if I was not interested, even if I am :frown1:.

 

[bananaclubcock]

As has already been discussed in this thread, shyness does not automatically translate to low confidence. Funnily, while you're waiting for Mr. Cajones to make something happen, bold, gregarious women like me have already charmed him, several like him, and a couple of the cute, shy ones, and made plans to see each other again some time. But you go on ahead and sit on your ass and wait for life to happen, and hide behind the notion that a real man will find you. Go on.

Yep. I am one of those shy-arrogant kind of guys. I'm just not into the whole 'salesman routine' where I am super aggressive with new people, that is my shyness. But I have plenty of confidence in a lot of matters and have tangled with many so-called alpha males in ways that they will never regret: it just depends upon the setting.

I also like your owning up to your attitude being a key to making it work with the shy guy. I posted earlier that I had found better luck with stronger/tougher women, they were actually less likely to dismiss me for not coming on strong at first. To me this all points to the need for everyone to do some trial and error and reconsider the value of ourselves and others. I get a little weirded out by so-called 'confidence' being treated as the one thing that makes guys successful with women. Yes it is important in many situations, but like a large penis it is far from a guarantee of success. To me, thinking differently about women has been much more helpful than trying to become another aggro guy.

 

[pervasiveone]

My guy is shy....but he is confident in himself. He doesn't talk too much or engage in a lot of conversation so it took a while to notice him. But when I did, and we started dating, boooy....lol

Uncut, really thick golden cock, with an athletic smooth body.....reward for me being non-judgemental I guess.

I think women these days should really stop using that ( if a, then b ) thinking. If he's shy then this. Or if he's this tall then that. Awesome sex, big dicks, matches made in heaven, and what not varies across people of every culture, continent, and instances.

very well said!

 

[xX_Sarah_Xx]

Ugh, I hate the making eye contact thing. I try it and women always seem to get very uncomfortable and it eventually gives way to either a grimace or a "you have no idea what you are doing" type of grin.

I must be doing it wrong or something.

Never exchanged looks with anyone. I mean I look but no one's ever looked back.

I'm guessing you don't "exchange looks" because what you're doing is staring. All the time. At one single lady, because you hope she'll turn around and then happens to meet your eye. That's not making eyecontact. It's being a creep.

Of course women will get uncomfortable if that's what you're doing.
Women notice when you keep staring at them. When it comes to that, we have eyes on our back.

Scan the room and just let your eyes rest on her one nano-second longer than on everyone else just at the time she's turning around. Look AWAY after. She'll have registered your interest.

My guy is shy....but he is confident in himself. He doesn't talk too much or engage in a lot of conversation so it took a while to notice him. But when I did, and we started dating, boooy....lol

Uncut, really thick golden cock, with an athletic smooth body.....reward for me being non-judgemental I guess.

I think women these days should really stop using that ( if a, then b ) thinking. If he's shy then this. Or if he's this tall then that. Awesome sex, big dicks, matches made in heaven, and what not varies across people of every culture, continent, and instances.

I certainly never said that I'm not dating shy guys because they're not confident. Stop using that if a, then b thinking yourself. Women that don't date shy guys, aren't automatically judgemental. It can very well be that a shy guy just wouldn't match her personality, or that it's something she's just *not* looking for in a guy.

 

[D_Hammond Happydipper]

I'm guessing you don't "exchange looks" because what you're doing is staring. All the time. At one single lady, because you hope she'll turn around and then happens to meet your eye. That's not making eyecontact. It's being a creep.

Of course women will get uncomfortable if that's what you're doing.
Women notice when you keep staring at them. When it comes to that, we have eyes on our back.

Scan the room and just let your eyes rest on her one nano-second longer than on everyone else just at the time she's turning around. Look AWAY after. She'll have registered your interest.

I think you forgot to tell him about eye lock. That's important also.


I aways seem to scan the room/area where ever go I always wonder why I did that .

Guessing I am doing ok at following my natural instinct.

 

[DasLeezard]

I feel like a safecracker when I meet a shy guy. I love a challenge.

 

[JG11]

I will say, I act shy, but certainly not for the reasons mentioned here. I'm a take-charge guy by nature. I'm a natural leader. What I don't have time for is the games women play. I do my thing and if a woman catches my eye, maybe I'll talk to her - maybe I won't. The minute she starts to play any cat-and-mouse or mental games, it's a huge turn off. This is simply because I want a woman and not a little girl. I'd say I'm more reserved and selective. I will tend to give alpha chicks a chance first. I like a woman that wants me and goes after me. It could work out if she doesn't play any games.

Guys worry too much about the little things and not enough of being themselves. Guys - you have to get past the fact that a chick's going to like you or NOT like you for who you are. There's thousands of great gals. MOVE ON. The shyness comes from not handling repeated rejection. For a weaker man, this kills all ego. It's a Grand Illusion really. How can you please her if you can't please yourself?

 

[B_subgirrl]

I'm guessing you don't "exchange looks" because what you're doing is staring. All the time. At one single lady, because you hope she'll turn around and then happens to meet your eye. That's not making eyecontact. It's being a creep.

I'd meant to reply to basincreek's post earlier and I forgot. I agree that this is what he's doing, but I DON'T agree that it's 'being a creep'. It FEELS creepy to the woman, but the action itself is not necessarily creepy. There are lots of people who don't understand the 'rules' of the social world through no fault of their own, and basincreek could be one of them.

Scan the room and just let your eyes rest on her one nano-second longer than on everyone else just at the time she's turning around. Look AWAY after. She'll have registered your interest.

This is REALLY good advice.

Even in a conversation with someone you know well, you shouldn't hold eye contact for more than a few seconds before you let your eyes flicker away and back again.


And shy guys: I guess I do give them a chance as one of my exes was quite shy with people he didn't know. But they are much less likely to grab my attention than the more bold guys, so they might get passed over by accident. I don't have anything against shy guys in theory though.

 

[mexdude]

Scan the room and just let your eyes rest on her one nano-second longer than on everyone else just at the time she's turning around. Look AWAY after. She'll have registered your interest

Mmm, i didnt knew that, i do it most of the time, but i always tought you only where noticed if the look lasted at least 2 secods or more

 

[MoneyForNothing]

It bothers me that staring is considered creepy. I see women staring at me in public sometimes and I like it. It annoys me when a woman makes a point of walking by me without her retinas pointing at me for even an instant. I feel it as a stuffy attitude. I do some staring of my own as well. I love looking at hotness and gazing eye to eye regardless of intent.

One time there was a gorgeous girl in a library staring at me as I saw in my peripheral vision. I suddenly turned my head toward her to "catch her". She took a few seconds and then shifted eyes away. So I turn back to my computer pretending to be busy again. She shifts back to me again. I wait a bit and turn around faster and this time she was quicker looking away. Third time I whipped around and this time she was instant. A funny game IMO. Sadly, someone came along and sat down with her. I wanted to see how that would play out.

 

[B_subgirrl]

It bothers me that staring is considered creepy. I see women staring at me in public sometimes and I like it. It annoys me when a woman makes a point of walking by me without her retinas pointing at me for even an instant. I feel it as a stuffy attitude. I do some staring of my own as well. I love looking at hotness and gazing eye to eye regardless of intent.

I just don't know what to say to this. Maybe you're misinterpreting things. Every woman I have ever spent more than a few minutes with has said staring feels creepy. And yes, the topic does come up that often, because there is always some bloke about who will stare at someone, resulting in the whole bunch of women getting the heebies.

One time there was a gorgeous girl in a library staring at me as I saw in my peripheral vision. I suddenly turned my head toward her to "catch her". She took a few seconds and then shifted eyes away. So I turn back to my computer pretending to be busy again. She shifts back to me again. I wait a bit and turn around faster and this time she was quicker looking away. Third time I whipped around and this time she was instant. A funny game IMO. Sadly, someone came along and sat down with her. I wanted to see how that would play out.

Now this is not staring. This is how it's supposed to work.

 

[Enid]

It bothers me that staring is considered creepy. I see women staring at me in public sometimes and I like it. It annoys me when a woman makes a point of walking by me without her retinas pointing at me for even an instant. I feel it as a stuffy attitude. I do some staring of my own as well. I love looking at hotness and gazing eye to eye regardless of intent.

One time there was a gorgeous girl in a library staring at me as I saw in my peripheral vision. I suddenly turned my head toward her to "catch her". She took a few seconds and then shifted eyes away. So I turn back to my computer pretending to be busy again. She shifts back to me again. I wait a bit and turn around faster and this time she was quicker looking away. Third time I whipped around and this time she was instant. A funny game IMO. Sadly, someone came along and sat down with her. I wanted to see how that would play out.

ok, i'm with you on the staring is not (inherently) creepy thing, but the bolded part of your quote bothers me. i myself often avoid eye contact in certain areas or when i just don't want to be bothered -- it is a person's right to do so. your annoyance at this is suggestive to me of entitlement, and expectation that women should cater to your desire to engage in eye foreplay. some women in certain situations don't want to. period. they don't owe it to you, and it certainly doesn't mean a woman is stuck-up. she might not want to attract attention that day, she may be trying to keep herself safe, there are any number of reasons a woman might be avoiding eye contact. how presumptive of you to assume it's because she's snooty.

 

[D_Hillary_Clitton]

I'm very much drawn to shy, timid types of men because I am the exact opposite, and I enjoy drawing them out of their shells ^_^